Is being rude just the norm in corporate America??

posted 2 years ago in Career
Post # 2
Member
3735 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

BurlapnLace:  I get prefacing things in nice ways and how it can get you better results depending on the person. However, it does seem more efficient to be direct and state the need instead of using flowery language. I do always say please and thank you but sometimes it really is an “I need…” kind of situation.

I try really hard not to use “could” too because that gives an option. I use “would you please…” because I’m trying to tell you nicely to execute something.

Post # 3
Member
11731 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t think I’ve ever experienced a situation like this in any of the offices I’ve been in.  Email taskings always started with, “Hey Jiminy, Could you do..” or “What’s the status on X project?” Sorry you’re facing some rudeness!

Post # 4
Member
716 posts
Busy bee

Ha, ha, ha, yup.  You can comfort yourself with the fact that your emotional intelligence and social maturity exceeds that of the sender and that you will get farther in life and in Corporate America as a result.

Post # 5
Member
6028 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

The norm in your company =/= the norm in Corporate America.

Post # 7
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

i’m lucky to work in an office environment right now that is extremely polite and close–i work in an academic office so i LOVE my coworkers and bosses and my students too (though thankfully they don’t email me). lol

but before this i worked for a fortune 500 company full of engineers. they weren’t trying to save lives either but to them it was more efficient to send a quick email that said “i need the balance on work order 1234 asap” than it was to type “hi, when you get a chance can you please give me the balance on work order 1234 as soon as you can? thanks so much.”

i don’t think it’s their intent to be rude. they’re just trying to cut out time spend emailing i would bet. don’t take it too personally, or too seriously. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
3735 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

BurlapnLace:  “Am I going to get this today?” Yeah, that would get under my skin too. Like, who the heck are you??

Post # 10
Member
9949 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Look at the difference between these two statements:

I think you’re being too sensitive.

You’re being too sensitive.

 

They convey the exact same information, but one is “nicer” because being direct isn’t seen as “nice”.  You are being slightly sensitive, though.  Not too sensitive.

Post # 11
Member
4413 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

MrsHalpert:  +1 — some people just write emails this way and think nothing of it! My DH is in the Army, and it got to the point where I had to proofread any non-work-related emails he wanted to send out because if I didn’t, they’d read like “Are you available for dinner at our house on Saturday. 6PM, address is ____. Wife will be making chicken.”

I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt when email is involved, since it’s so hard to tell the difference between “terse asshole” and “efficient professional.” But if they’re dickish in person? Oh hell naw.

Post # 12
Hostess
9908 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

BurlapnLace:  I work in a development consulting office and we work with other consultants all the time who have different specialties.  We often have to coordinate drawings and things between companies.  I always try to remain recpectful with them and generally they treat me in kind.  It doesn’t always happen, and honestly – if you’re a jerk when you ask, you’re going ot wait longer than if you’re nice!

Post # 13
Member
2395 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Eh, email in the office is just a quick way to get info across.  I wouldn’t worry about it.

Post # 14
Member
1886 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

BurlapnLace:  Not the norm. I work for a huge international corporation and if I were sending out emails with that tone, someone would’ve already had a conversation with me about it.

Post # 15
Member
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Being rude in general in america is the norm, no matter how nice you are or professional or accommodating you are! People are just jaded and mean and don’t have a filter or manners. I’ve known people where it’s just their personality to be rude and obnoxious. They don’t even know they are doing it!

My advice is to not let it change who you are. 

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