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So Mr.Awesome has unique, yet well put together, style. He always dresses to the nines in a semi country boy/rocker way. This has carried over into wedding attire.
We are having a semi casual ceremony with the men all wearing nice jeans, black button up shirts, and black boots. Mr.Awesome is taking it a step farther by wanting to wear the hat pictured below. Now, I have no problem with it, we are having a small (75-85 guest) gathering and it fits his style. My mother on the other hand is VERY concerned that the skull will be offensive. (Mainly to my grandfather who is a very openminded preacher.) Her arguement is that we are being married in a chapel and she doesn't want anyone to be uncomfortable. My arguement is that yes, it is a chapel, BUT it has not had a religious service there in close to 80 years and that I highly doubt my Papa would even notice.
From an outside perspective, what do you other Bees think?
I don't think it's necessarily offensive, but I find it a little odd to wear a hat indoors?? Maybe he can just wear it for a few pictures and the reception rather than at the ceremony if it's going to cause waves?
IMO, it's a bit much to wear during a wedding ceremony, of any sort. Could he just wear it afterwards?
Sorry, but, I'm a Christian, and if I went to a wedding and the groom wore that (granted, I don't know the groom in this situation and if I was going to the wedding I probably would!) but I would find the hat...creepy...at the very least. (a skull in the middle of a cross?)
I agree with SapphireSun, I don't think he should wear it indoors.
LOL You kind of hit it on the head ladies. If I know him, he will have it off before the ceremony starts or will leave it someplace due to nerves. I don't mind as I said, but I agree, it is flashy, best used for pictures. On the other hand, it is him. Ugh.
Thanks for input! I am liking this poll thing!
I think its fine, it is so small, he probably won't even notice. I didn't notice it until after I read your post, when I just looked at the photo I didn't see it.
It's not offensive but it may be inappropriate for the ceremony. What about just putting it on for the reception? and pictures?
Yeah, I still say not offensive, but I think to wear that ON YOUR WEDDING DAY, you'd have to really feel like it was an expression of who you are, not just like a random accessory. It's definitely a statement piece, and these pictures will be what you look back on for years. I have to say that has definite "what was I thinking?" potential.
I don't find the hat itself offensive. I am one of those particular people who find it odd to wear a hat indoors at a wedding ceremony, however.
I thought it was rude / bad etiquette / un-gentleman-like to wear a hat indoors period. At least that's what I've seen / heard from family that live down south.
Honestly, I barely noticed the skull... However I agree with pp's and wearing a hat indoors for your wedding feels a bit innapropriate. IF he wants to wear a hat indoors for the ceremony I say keep it simple and unremarkable (a simple palm leaf would do) and change into that hat for the reception and some pictures.
i didnt even notice the skulls but when indoors men should remove their hat from their head
I wouldn't say it's offensive but I don't think I'd be okay with my future spouse wearing something like that on our wedding day. There are so many other choices of hats and I would prefer no hats in doors.
I don't personally find the hat offensive (I didn't even see the skull until it was pointed out) but if I recall from my days of Catholic school, wearing a hat in "the house of God" is a no-no.
Yet another response, no it's not offensive to me but it's not appropriate to wear a hat indoors. Also, while I'm all for one expressing their own unique style, this would be something I would regret to have in my wedding photos years down the road. Sorry if that offends anyone, I just look back on my pics from 2 yes ago and I'm a little sad that my FIL wore very casual jeans. While my ceremony was far from traditional or formal, our family picture was something that's hard to duplicate and it would have been nice for him to take a bit more pride in it.
Personally I think it reminds me way to much of Brett Michaels and find the hat kinda ugly. I would be offended if a groom wore that at a wedding.
It reminds me of Marilyn Manson in the music video sweet dreams. I think it's pretty cool personally...It depends what kinda vibe you have. If you guys are having an alternative/offbeat/ wedding, it would go well.
If you're blonde and wearing pastels with curls and a white lacy dress--- it might look out of place. If, however, you had a retro updo, red lipstick and a vampy dress with a black sash... it'd "match" more. I think you have to think of the overall picture of the wedding---- you don't want it to be "one of these things is not like the others"---- so it draws too much attention to itself and takes away from the ceremony. As for a teeny skull in a cross--- I really don't think it's that offensive. If the cross was upsidedown, I think it'd be much worse. :)
He shouldn't be wearing a hat inside of a chapel at all, that would offend most religious people.
Yes, it's your day, but honestly, I hate that phrase. The second you start inviting guests to take part in your day, you have to consider them as well. Granted, his wardrobe isn't really affecting the guests, but I'd still not wear the hat. It's way too casual for a wedding and would (or should) be a major 'what the heck was I thinking?!' moment.
I was gonna say no, but since you're getting married in a church yes. It is rude to wear any hat in a church if you're a guy. period. You want to get married in a church you should respect it.
I didn't notice the skull until I read what you wrote. He should wear it if you guys really want to, but you did say you're worried about it being offensive (particularly to your Papa). I'm not sure if it would be offensive or not. Have you considered asking your Grandfather what his opinion is?
I agree with the PP's. The hat itself is not offensive. However, wearing any hat indoors, especially in a church/chapel is a no no.
I don't think offensive is the right word. I think disrespectful is a better choice. I was raised to act in a reverent manner in a church (no matter what the denomination), and wearing hats inside any building, especially a church was disrespectful...I wiould just have him hold off on wearing it until after the wedding!
I didn't even see the skull until I stared at the photo for a minute. The hat isn't offensive, but men are not suppose to wear hats indoors. Maybe he can wear it for photos?
I did not even see the skull until I read your post. I am a Christian and getting married in a church - we have more traditional attire but that hat does not bother me a bit. My Fiance is from Kansas and we met due to an interest in the Old West. We both always used to wear cowboy boots and Wranglers and things - sparingly now as our lifestyle has changed, but my dad said he wanted him to wear a cowboy hat to the wedding and I said no because thats not our theme. lol.
Why don't you just ask your Grandfather about it? is he officiating?
I think it is your wedding and if that is your style, your fiances style then everyone there should know that for the most part and is there to support you. That skull is so small that only the first few rows will probably notice it, and they should be family anyway.
From my understanding the question was about the skull, not the hat itself, or a hat indoors etc.
Do what you want!
Maybe he should just wear it for the reception/ party and not to the actual cermony?
I agree with PPs...why can't he wear it outdoors for a few pics? Wearing it inside doesn't seem like a good idea to me.
I can think of about 3-5 reasons why I think he shouldn't wear the hat!!! Offending people, wearing hat indoors, having that in your wedding photos etc etc....
I had to look for the skull , I wouldnt have noticed it if I wasnt looking for it
I do think it might look a little strange and 'loud' for an indoor ceremony
The hat itself is not offensive. However it is considered disrespectful to the church for a man to wear a hat indoors and he will be asked to remove it.
My family would walk up and take any hat off of anyone if they wore it indoors. I'm sure they'd be so quick to strike they wouldn't even notice the skull =D
I say he could wear it to the reception only. The skull doesn't bother me at all, but I answered maybe becuase it could be offensive to a lot of people, the skull, the cross, or even the fact that he is wearing a hat at a wedding ceremony at all. You run the risk of offending at least one person with every thing you do, so you have to decide what will be the least offensive to the most amount of people.
I voted no but I would also suggest that he only wear it for the reception unless the ceremony was outdoors. If he still wanted to wear it, then I would have no problem.
At first quick glance I didn't even see the skull what with the way the light was hitting the cross, just made it glint a certain way to me. Nevertheless, I agree that it is more a case of proper manners to not wear a hat indoors. Plus, it'll be easier for him to kiss his bride that way instead of having to nudge the rim of the hat out of the way first!
I think it's totally fine -- there's nothing offensive about it, from my perspective. It sounds like it goes with the groom's style perfectly.
I do agree with the others that hats would normally be removed indoors, though.
The skull is small so it wouldn't really show up in pictures but I wouldn't want anything like that in my wedding. That's me though. If you have no probelms with it then he should wear it. Maybe he can find a hat a little less flashy that he likes to make your mom feel more comfortable but if not then don't worry about it. It is your day and as long as you and your groom are happy it is a success.
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