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I want to know which ladies are not going to know anything at all about the proposal and that means when he buys the ring, what the ring looks like, if he has asked your father yet ( if that applies to you ) and maybe the only thing you know is it could happen in the next 4-6 months.
I basically did not know anything! We had talked about marriage, but I did not think he was planning behind my back because we had only been together for 18 months. I did get a feeling that he was ring shopping in the weeks before he proposed, but didn't think he would propose soon because his job was laying people off at that time.
Anyways, he completely surprised me while we were on vacation in Las Vegas in March 2009. I am glad that I was oblivious and that he picked out my ring on his own. I know others want to be more involved, but the way things happened was great for us!
@jaylii9: How did you have the feeling that he was ring shopping? What gave that away? I wont be involved like you ...with picking out the ring with him.... ( he has some pictures of what I like ) I wont know anything. In a way I think thats better in the end for the surprise factor but right now its killing me.
Complete surprises are great if they pan out that way. Mine would have been a complete surprise if he did it 15 months ago.
I had absoluetly NO CLUE. I didn't even know a time frame. I thought it was years off as school was just starting up for me. Lo and behold he'd done online investigation, figured out how a ring was conflict free, figured out where to shop and how to ask my father all in the months precedding his proposal... and I hadn't a clue. I actaully really liked the surprise factor.
ETA: I didn't like the ring, BUT I grew to love it, I wouldn't have traded it even if he offered. :)
This is kind of like the ring I want......
@vmec: Do you live close to your parents? where he can stop by there after work or something without you really knowing? Or did he ask your father when you were both over there and take him aside by himself? Because my parents live about 45 minutes away and I am thinking that I would know if he went by himself over there...
I instructed him to lie to me. Because I'm pretty good at reading his body language. I guessed what my Xmas gift was weeks before I got it after minimal questioning. I sent him a couple style ideas and he's never given me a hard timeline. Just that it will happen. But I told him that if I ever press for a specific timeline to just lie. Example: if it's 8 months away tell me within a year, etc. I will obsess, and i will get my answer. :) It's for my own good because I want it to be a surprise. We live in Maryland and my parents are in Wyoming and his are in Arizona, so we've never officially met each other's families. So, I'm not sure if he will really be able to ask my dad for permission. But I am excited about how he will decide to pull it off.
@claireos: Yeah I guess they will find somehow to get it done, I need to have more faith in him. I am sure he is going to be extra sneaky about it and he isnt that easy to read which will make it not so obvious.
I won't (don't) know anything. He doesn't want help ring shopping, I'm not even sure he's going to ask my parents (it's not important to any of us), and I have no real timeline aside from the fact that he said I wouldn't have to wait until our anniversary this June.
So. Here I wait. :)
I haven't got a clue what is going on. We talk about marriage, kids, buying a house, etc. And about 1.5 years ago I showed him a picture of the ring that I wanted (and he knows where to find it on my laptop if need be). Other than that... He has never talked about buying a ring, a proposal, nothing. It is going to be a complete surprise. Which I'm fine with, but at the same time I HATE being left in the dark because it makes me feel like\think he's not doing anything to move our relationship to the next level.
Gwen
The timing of my proposal was a complete surprise. A few months prior, he'd ask for general guidelines about what ring style I would like, and then it never really came up again. I was hopeful that it would be coming soon, but we never went shopping together, I didn't know when he sat down with my parents, etc. We went to separate colleges and he surprised me by driving 5.5 hours and planning it out with my friends, so it was a HUGE surprise when I walked outside of my dorm and he was there! I absolutely loved it that way :)
Mine was a complete surprise. Our year anniversary was coming up a month later, so I thought it might come around or after that, but he surprised me by picking the anniversary of the day we met instead of when we started dating.
He completely surprised me with the ring. It's a family diamond, and I happened to talk to his mom about all of the rings that they have so I knew they were all taken, and kind of disappointed b/c I always wanted a family ring. What I didn't know was that she was going to pass down her ring (my husband's great grandma's originally) to me. It was easy for him to get it b/c he just had to pick it up from his mom's house.
He didn't ask my dad's permission, which he later explained was b/c he didn't want to ruin the surprise. My parents have big mouths, so I don't blame him for that.
@GwenvonD: Do you give him little hints here and there to let it be known that you are wanting it sometime soon? Some guys need that. Maybe have a calm talk with him to know where you both stan and leave it at that, dont bug him anymore. But some men think that everything is fine and they will keep going that way until their girlfriend gives them that little kick in the butt.
i had no idea it was coming. i mean we had looked at rings in passing but never went ring shopping and he always said in a few more years. he asked my parenst and they didnt say anything to anyone. he didnt even tell my best friend so i was in shock. He had thos whole event planned. i was so off guard that when i found the message in the bottle on the beach i thought i had found someone elses proposal. it wasnt until i turned around and he was on his knee that i knew it wsa for me. i love the fact that i had no idea. i think it kept me from thinking it was coming and being let down after we did something and the proposal didnt happen.
@Julesb81: But you had gone into jewellery stores and looked at rings together? Mine will barely let me give him pictires of what I want until I told him that I am the one who has to wear it the rest of my life so I want what I like. Were you on vacation when he proposed?
I have an idea of the ring, since we went ring shopping together. But a couple weeks ago when I showed him a ring similar to what we looked at - he said he thinks I'm going to be surprised at what he gets...I was like wtf?! Did you already get the ring...what's going on??!!! He just smiled and shrugged. :|
I know he's not going to ask my dad and we don't really have a timeline - but I'm thinking it will be on our anniversary at the end of this month. I've been waiting for over a year and I think about it all the time - so I'm not sure if it will be a complete surprise! I guess the way he does it will be a surprise though.
I'm sure it will be a complete surprise for me. We have a timeline and he asked once on his own what I want for a ring in September '10 (more like checking to make sure he remembered correctly) & then a couple weeks ago I got more specific because I once changed my mind but then changed it back and wanted him to know I changed it back to the super cheaper-but-more-romantic option. Other than that, I'm pretty sure he's going to do it all sneaky on his own. He waits until the last minute for b-day & Christmas gifts and they're always spectacular. He's also already surprised me with jewelry that he had cut from my stash of uncut gems from a gem-mining place we go to so he's already had experience with sneaking gemstones right from under my nose.
@Anxiouspeanut: He told me after the fact. Him and my Dad are both really into Porches, and they went down to the states together and he said he asked permission then. Awww. But if that didn't happen then I presume he would have just called him up on his own and took him out for dinner, privately. Hope that answers your question :)
@vmec: Yeah it does, I am just thinking how mine would do it.. cause there are never any opportunities that arise where him and m y dad would go out for dinner... but I am sure he will pull something off.
The more you think about the more you potentially set yourself up for failure. So just make it clear it is important that he does ask, after that leave it to him. It really is for him to figure out though right? I know it's hard but you're going to have to figure something out to keep you occupied, this isn't really your concern I guess I'm trying to say.
But it IS okay to tell him that your fathers permission is something you'd like him to get. If he's not a stupid idiot (LOL joke) he'll find a way :)
@vmec: It really isnt a huge deal and it wouldnt really be considered asking permission from my father but he told me he wants to have the talk with him before he does it anyways. I know he will figure it out.
I didn't know anything about it. We had been together for almost 4 years and were shopping for our first home to buy, and around Christmas time when we went to the mall together he was kinda asking me which rings I liked, but putting it in the context of what his good friend (who proposed a month before he did) bought for his FI. We always talked about our future and had been living together for a long time, but the proposal was a total surprise--he whisked me off to Atlantic City for a date at a fancy restaurant and the rest is history!
i knew nothing about it. whenever i would bring up marriage or a 'timeline' he was give me a very vague answer like 'within the next 2 years you'll be married' or 'sooner than later' it was so frustrating! he ordered the ring, picked it up and then went and told his parents and my mom, and then asked my dad for premission, later that night he asked! i was completely shocked, had no idea it had been coming. we were together just over a year and a half when he proposed, so even though i woudl ask him about marriage, i thought he would think it was too soon.
I had absolutely no idea that my proposal was coming. It happened on christmas morning. He went out christmas shopping with my mom, asked her while they were out, bought the ring, and then came home and talked to my dad about it. Two days later, we are opening presents christmas morning and he proposes!! I was completely suprised,and it was absolutely perfect. The only people that knew he was doing it was my parents, my sister, and his parents. He had told them on xmas eve while we were at his house. We went out to the car and he went back inside saying he "had to go the bathroom." Really he was letting his parents know what his plans were for the next morning.
@Anxiouspeanut:My ring looks just like that! I absolutely looooove it 
@Future Couture: Awww what a beautiful ring... So it seems that a lot of men do it all at once... Like yours went christmas shopping with your mom and then told your dad bought the ring and a few days later he proposed... I hope mine is like that... kind of in a week span....
@sarbear2814: Mine used to do that, but now I get ." I have a plan in my head its all worked out, it will hapeen when you least excpect it, maybe in the next couple of months maybe longer maybe shorter who knows" grrrrrr so frusterating....
I did not know that he was planning to propose. However, he did not propose with a ring and we picked it out together after the proposal. So yes, it was a complete surprise.
i have no clue though i did just ask how far along he was with his saving for the ring [he keeps mentioning how i liked the most expensive ring ever. bah, i did not expect to fall in love with the halo settings! lol] but other than that, all i know is that it'll happen sometime soon after he moves out here. whenever that will be.
We haven't (and probably won't) gone shopping together either. A couple of years ago he mentioned that he wanted to 'talk' to my dad, but that was 2 years ago. If he was gonna do it NOW, he probably wouldn't tell me. And my dad wouldn't tell anyone but my mom... I can read my mom like a book though, hehehe.
GVD
I won't know anything. He won't even HINT at anything. But I don't know that it is coming in the next 4-6 months. Then again, I have no clue at all.
All I know is that I will get to pick out my own ring when all is said and done.
@Anxiouspeanut:I got the feeling because we are usually together on weekends and he had a mystery appointment one day. I kind of thought he was off seeing his parent's good friend who was a jeweler. :) Last laugh is on me though because I suspected something in February and he proposed in March....I found out much later that he had already chatted with the jeweler back in December at a holiday party!
@Anxiouspeanut: oh he would say that too 'i have a plan' well...what is the plan!?! lol it was frustrating, but so worth the wait(i can say that now! haha)
I know what the ring looks like I picked it out. I told him my dad would like for him to ask for my hand. I don't however have a timeline. It's the one thing he refuses to even give me a hint about. I however have my own timeline of when I think it might happen. I'll find it if I'm right or not some time next year.
@Anxiouspeanut: Thank you :) he did so good. he knew what i would like. I'm not the type to wear a long of "bling" and I am not the skinniest girl, but have super long and thin fingers. My ring is a 6 1/4. Which is you saw me you would think is crazy. But my FI did amazing. I cried all Christmas day and could not stop staring at my ring. I still can't!
Well I am still in the waiting stage. We did go shopping together though so I know what my ring looks like, it has been sized, it is sitting in a box in our bedroom and I know where it is, I dont know if he has asked my Dad, and I hope to get engaged in the next couple of months (hopefully - Ive already been waiting since December). So yeah, I know a lot about it, but I dont know exactly when or how he will propose and Im sure Ill still be surprised and excited.
*Sorry, my computer wont make apostrophes right now...I dont have bad grammar
I don't really know anything other than we went ring shopping and picked out a ring this past summer/fall. Although because he's been laid off I'm not even sure if the ring will be purchased (unless he put it on layaway). So at this point I'm not sure when it's coming (definitely this year or else :) ) or if I will be getting the "chosen" ring. So I guess still a surprise. I'm not sure when although I know he will do it possibly in the next 4 months (that's my deadline -- 4 year anniversary).
To the bees that know their boyfriends have the ring that is a huge start. I am pretty sure mine doesnt have the ring like 99% sure. So I am going nuts because there is so much for him to do to even get to the proposal point I fear I am going to be waiting forever.
@Anxiouspeanut: I feel the same way. I'm hoping it's going to happen the end of this month - but I really am not sure if he has the ring yet. I don't think he does - so it seems like it's not going to happen! But at the same time he could just be really good at hiding it from me!
@Anxiouspeanut: That's exactly how I feel even though he's agreed with my timeline and basically agreed to getting married next May. It's like, Do you really understand all that goes into making a proposal and can you not leave it until the last possible second thereby delaying it even more?!
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