Is it bad etiquette to bring a friend as a guest to a wedding?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1080 posts
Bumble bee

@LabDarling:  Ask the bride.

Women on a website can’t tell you the right answer to this.

Sure, she wrote ‘and guest’ but she might only want people she knows at the wedding. I sure don’t want random strangers in my photos.

The only thing you can do is ask the bride.

Post # 5
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@LabDarling:  Do they know your fiance and expect him to attend?  Or did they just write “and guest”?  If it’s just “and guest” you will probably be fine.  But I can tell you after reading so many posts about whether to invite live-in boyfriends versus engaged people only, the bride might be pissed if she sees that you brought a random stranger to her wedding instead of your SO.

Post # 6
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

if i were the bride: if you explained that your fiance couldn’t come, but you wanted to bring a friend as your guest so you won’t be alone, it would be fine with me. i’d rather my guests have a good time than be alone and bored.

does the bride know this friend?

Post # 7
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My friend’s date cancelled at the last minute.. she brought her mom.. I didnt care.. but i dont really care very much about ettiquite or enforce ettiquite jail for mesing up. Im sure it will be fine, but if you want to be sure ask the bride 🙂 

Post # 8
1118 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I agree with asking the bride.  When I was single I was invited to one of my good friends weddings and I didn’t have a date.  I told her I would have fun coming alone b/c other friends would be there but she literally insisted that i bring somone.  I ended up taking a friend (but it was a male friend) and we had a blast. I think i would have had a blast either way but the bride seemed happy that I brought a date and she actually still talks about how much fun we had on the dance floor together…..

Post # 9
480 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

You need to ask the bride this one. If the wedding was in your home town, I would say yes it’s bad, but due to the long drive and the fact she already invited two of you, if I was the bride, I would be okay with it.

Post # 10
1327 posts
Bumble bee

I think it’s okay as long as she brings a gift to cover her seat – I always give cash so I’d bring a $100 gift per person.

Post # 12
402 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@LabDarling:  I was a bridesmaid in a wedding a few years ago where I brought a a male friend as my date.  Everyone else in the bridal party was already married and I didn’t want to be the only one on my own. 

If I offer a date or a +1 to a guest, I’m already counting on having that extra head and really don’t care who they bring, so long as they’re happy and comfortable!

Post # 13
491 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Just ask the bride. I had dame same thing happen to me where a friend’s spouse couldn’t attend and they asked if it was okay if they can bring a friend instead

 I was cool with that because it didn’t alter the number of guests and they had company at the wedding. 

Post # 16
490 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Doesn’t hurt to ask.  I’d be more willing to allow something if I was asked first, instead of someone just showing up.  Not the same situation, but I had a friend ask me if it was okay if she and her husband wore cowboy boots instead of dress shoes.  I would have been fine either way because I know their financial situation – they have cowboy boots but no dress shoes, and not a whole lot of money lying around – but I do appreciate the thoughtfulness.


Seriously, just talk to the bride and explain your situation. I’m sure it’ll be fine.


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