Is it bitchy not to talk them anymore?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@BlushLove:  It sounds like everyone (you included) is being immature about the entire situation. Your cousin was vindictive about having kids at a wedding (immature) your aunt and cousin didn’t attend because they were busy, but knew in advance (poor manners) and your mother stopped speaking to her sister because of this (really? they are grown women.) 

Just because your cousins, aunt and mom are being immature and ignoring each other doesn’t mean you have to follow suit. It’s family and I think you should get over it. They should also get over it. However, the only person who’s actions you can control are your own. 

Post # 4
Member
8720 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

@thenewmrsmax:  couldnt have said it better myself.

Post # 7
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

If the relationships were strained before (which you have said they were) it seems like you don’t want to fix it and you don’t have to. They were deliberately bitches to you so if it was me I’d just ignore them and move on. They obviously only care about themselves, case in point, the bitch had her 2nd wedding 2 days before you just because you were having a no kids wedding…bitchy.

 

Post # 8
Member
965 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@BlushLove:  But you are letting your Mom’s relationship with your aunt effect you and your relationship with her. You don’t have to like family or agree with them, but at long as she isn’t harming your mother, stay out of it. Sisters fight. 

Post # 11
Member
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

@BlushLove I know that’s why I think they are all just super bitchy. If my sister told me to do that (she has kids, I do not) I wouldn’t ever do it. I’d let her be petty about it and not drag me into it…apparently with these cousins if one doesn’t like it they all don’t like it. They just sound spoiled and selfish and honestly family or not, I wouldn’t allow anyone to treat me like that.

Post # 12
Member
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t care if they’re relatives:  if relationships are toxic or inflammatory, just drop them.  It’s not worth it.

Post # 13
Member
670 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@BlushLove:  Eh, I think that what your cousin and aunt did was incredibly selfish and blatantly rude. I honestly cannot believe that somebody who considers themselves ‘family’ would decide to pull something like this without the intention of dividing the family, knowing full well that this wedding of thiers would interfer with them and other members being able to attend your wedding. I suspect there must be more to the story, other than the “no children allowed” thing, but who cares. Your Cousins and Auntie are mean.

Just a little background – my DH and I were engaged about 9 months after one of his BFFs was engaged. They moved back home around the time we announced our engagement and still had not told anybody when thier wedding was going to be or anything. We basically had our date and venue booked within 2 weeks and when we told them they flipped thier sh*t cause apparently they had planned thiers for the week before ours but did not even tell anybody yet, including us. Flash forward, niether couple attended each other’s wedding, but we all did send eachother gifts and cards, etc. and we all still talk and hang out and love eachother. It sucked that the dates were conflicting, but we got over it.

Post # 14
Member
11740 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree that everyone in the situation is being immature and rude to each other, including you, OP.  The silent treatment is never a mature response to any situation, and actually takes away from any argument you may have.  If you can’t put this behind you and act like an adult, then sure, distance yourself from them.  But in the end, it’s your choice if you want to end a relationship with your family members.

Post # 15
Member
10748 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

That is stupid and petty of them. If I were you (since it doesn’t sound like you were all that close), I would completely ignore the situation and wait for them to apologize or make the first move. If not, oh well. Their loss. 

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