Post # 1
So Ill start with saying that we are paying for the wedding ourselves. We arent having anythin super crazy, just a lovely beach ceremony in Mexico. Cancun was the cheapest airport we found to fly into and all the people who said they wanted to go were really happy about that.
We are going to have to pay for FI parents to fly to our wedding and stay, since they dont have money to spend on that. I have no problem doing that, especially if it means that his parents will get to see us get married!
Ok, now onto the question…My FI has a boat he bought on craigslist about 3 years ago. We have used the boat….probably a total of 6 times in those 3 years. Dont get me wrong, I love going out on the boat and waterskiing and stuff, but we just dont use it that much. I asked him to think about selling the boat so we could at least pay for our venue. He agreed, but did absolutely nothing about it. I asked him again a couple of weeks ago and he said he would think about it. I hate to sound like a nag, but it would really, really, reallllly help with moving forward with our wedding plans.
I already have money saved from cutting back on shopping and nail salon visits
He thinks we should just take out a loan, but I dont want to do this unless absolutely necessary. I think I am really starting to get stressed out about how much weddings actually cost and Im wondering how anybody actually does it! lol
Sorry this turned out so long, but I would really appreciate some input from the lovely bees
Post # 3
Well, I don’t think going into debt for one day is a good idea, so if selling the boat is the only other option…… BUT, depending on your region, you may not get “top dollar” for you boat right now. I used to live in Tampa, and everyone was trying to sell their stuff to make ends meet in this crappy economy – so there were a lot of boats on the market and not a lot of buyers…..I can see your FI wanting to hold onto his boat right now because he might not get what it’s worth. You mentioned that you are already cutting corners – instead of nagging him about the boat, ask him what he is/can be doing to save money for the wedding – maybe there are other options?? Good luck!
Post # 4
Yeah, he bought the boat for $3000 I think, so its not a HUGE amount of money.
Thanks for the advice
Post # 5
Perhaps you should try for the discussion to be more open ended. Say you would prefer not to take out a loan, what are ways you guys can come up with the money. Maybe selling the boat isn’t the only option or he’ll realize it’s a fine option once he tries to come up with the money elsewhere.
Post # 6
I’m in the Northeast, so I could tell you that everyone selling in the fall up here is just trying to dump their junk so they don’t have to winterize and/or repair it. Usually, your best shot at selling is in the spring. If your part of Texas is warm year round, it might not be the same story. I know what you mean though. When money is tight, I try to think of what I can sell!
Do you think people will send you cash gifts for the wedding? It might not be horrible to throw some stuff on a credit card if you expect to be able to pay it off semi-quickly.
Post # 7
- Wedding: October 2010 - The Atlantic Beach Club
I was in a similar situation with Mr. Starfish. When we first started planning, we assuemd we’d pay for it ourselves. Mr. S has a sports car he works on that he’s driven about 5 times in the 7 years we’ve been together. I did mention selling it to him once when I was stressed, but it meant a lot to him. Now that the wedding is over, I’m happy he didn’t sell it. I can totally see where you are coming from, since I initially had the same though.
I know money is tight now, but if your fi loves it, I would recommend talking to him about others ways to save. If he bought it three years ago for $3,000 he may not even get close to that now. Mr. S comes from a boat town and boats aren’t selling as well as they used to because of the economy. Is there anything else you can do? I know Mr. S worked longer hours to help pay for things, as did I.
Post # 8
I totally hear you on selling the boat. BIL has a boat for approx that long and we have gone out on it approx 5 times in that span. And the only reason why I relate is it has sat on our driveway immobile for 2 summers.
I do think though however, right now, since it’s not the season for it is not a good time to sell. A good time to buy but not sell. I would consider selling after the wedding before summer to get the best price!
Post # 9
That seems to be the story with everyone I’ve ever known who has a boat–they end up rarely using it. I suspect that unless you live on the water, it makes more $ sense to rent them.
I would not consider taking on debt if there is a non essential asset sitting around collecting dust.
Post # 10
I would try to avoid a loan as much as possible. Have you thought of having a wedding on a beach close to home? That would save you the cost of his parents flight and hotel which is prob close to what he could get for his boat anyway, if not more. Also, you can go to Mexico for your honeymoon. I know it may actually be cheaper for you to have a destination wedding depending on the resort and if you need to pay for food and drinks, etc. but maybe consider staying closer to home if you can find a cheaper venue and then FI can keep the boat.
Post # 11
Yeah I agree with yoy ladies that say it would be smart to sell it in the spring or summer, opposed to right now.
Thanks for the help on this, For the couples who are paying for the wedding themselves, How did yall pay for it? How long did you save? Did you take out a loan?
Post # 12
Boats are a huge money sink, and if you aren’t using it on a regular basis, even more so. I think that’s fair, especially since he already agreed to it. It sounds like you guys haven’t had a very candid discussion about it – and you need to. You need to know his real feelings on the subject and why he is hesitating.
Also, a loan for wedding expenses = horrible idea. If you can’t afford it, just don’t do it.
Post # 13
@HoneyBear: We had some savings already that we used for deposits, and then we paid throughout the year we were engaged as we had the money. No debt. WEDDINGS ARE NOT WORTH DEBT.
Post # 14
@Honeybear – we are saving, saving, saving…..and we pushed back our wedding 12 months so we would have more time to save. We have a really tight monthly (household) budget, and I won’t lie, it kinda sucks….and I really miss our pizza and wing nights (sigh). But for us, its either give up our “extras” or just have a courthouse wedding…..most days we are OK with giving up the extras
Post # 15
@HoneyBear: We are in the same boat (excuse the pun) and are paying for our own wedding. I drafted up a budget of all of our income and all of our debits…right down to gas for our cars, groceries and etc. I figured out just how much we could afford to send our vendors every month. We absolutely don’t put it into savings because there is a chance one of us might decide we really need those new tires or to get our nails done. If it is already spent and sent to the vendors, we manage to stay on our budget.
Just a thought…
Post # 16
I can see where you’re coming from, but if you weren’t trying to pay for the wedding you probably wouldn’t have thought twice about selling the boat so I’d drop the issue if I were you. You don’t want to feel bad about it after the wedding and you don’t want any resentment lingering.