(Closed) Is it just me?!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
307 posts
Helper bee

it’s funny that such a big fight came out of something kind of small.  i think the stress of the wedding is getting to you.  ^_^

*hugs*

i think i would have reacted the same way.  so it’s not just you.

good luck, everything will work out!

Post # 4
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

You’ll Be ok. Ur just stressed about the wedding! Just take a few minutes to yourself and take a deep breathe.

Post # 5
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Not to get personal, well OK maybe to get personal…   has he turned down – or rather "sacrificed" – other events in lieu of wedding planning/preparing? How many times has he recently said "no" to do something that he wanted to do?

If you answer is yes, he has turned down a lot of other things that he wanted to do – then maybe he’s just feeling as if he can’t do what he wants – even this ONE time.

If your answer is no, he has NOT turned down (sacrificed) events, then I can understand why you’re upset.

Tell him you appreciate all the sacrifices he’s made (only if it’s true) and say them out loud, "like when you didn’t go to happy hour" or "when you helped with the favors" etc. Can you make a date for a game after the wedding? Hang in there! Good luck tonight.

Suza

 

Post # 6
Member
262 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hey choco,

Sorry this happened with you guys, how awful.  I’ve already gotten in a fight with my FI about stupid wedding stuff and we still have some months to go.  Don’t beat yourself up over it, or him, you guys are likely way drained. 

Here are a few suggestions:

  • Make a calendar to do list and put it up where you both can see it.  If you don’t live together, make a copy for each person.  Then it is CLEAR AS CAN BE what needs to be done and when. Mu FI is all about the shared google calendar, which I don’t really like, but it helps him remember things so I use it so we cna be on teh same page.  It prevents a LOT of misunderstanding. 
  • Don’t make any planning decisions via email.  Call on the phone or talk in person.  With email it is too difficult to misconstrue what someone means when things are already feeling stressful. 
  • Try to find some time to do something fun and don’t even talk about the wedding.  Even if it is just going on a walk to get an ice cream cone, do SOMETHING.
  • Each of you should make a plan of ONE THING to do before the wedding for yourself to unwind.  Perhaps for him it can be going to the game.  Perhaps for you it can be a massage.  Do something that feels rejuvinating.  YOu’ll need energy! 

Good luck and hang in there.  It was a little tiff and these happen. 

 

Post # 8
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Choco83, I’ve been thinking about you. How did it go last night? Hope it went well. ~Suza

Post # 9
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I’m sorry that you guys had a fight so close to your wedding — it can’t be easy. The good news is that I don’t think that it’s impossible to overcome. And, if he really wants to go to the game, it means more alone-time for you to be able to complete those last-minute projects.

*HUGS* Good luck. 

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