Post # 1
Unfortunately we can’t afford to add any more people to dinner.
there are a handful of people who I went to college with and though we dont communciate as often, there was a time we were very close. I’ve called each of them 1 by 1 and let them know personally we couldnt extend a dinner invite, but would love for them to come after dinner for the cocktails and dancing and they all said YES and were very understanding. I’d still like to send them the Ceremony invitation along with a Reception card advising them to come at 9pm which should be well into the celebration. Just curious if this is common, or if its taboo?
thoughts? and also, not qutie sure how to word it.
My current reservation card will read:
Please join us for cocktails at half after six in the evening
Dinner and dancing to follow
CHICAGO MART PLAZA HOLIDAY INN
wolf point ballroom, fifteenth floor
350 West Mart Center Drive, Chicago, Illinois
How can I alter this to read just to come for a cocktail and dancing celerbation?
“Please join us for a cocktail celebration at Nine in the evening”
Or some ppl suggested saying “Please join us for The Afters at Nine in the evening?
Post # 3
I don’t know that I would invite them to the ceremony and then exclude them for a portion and then bring them back. I think they either come afterwards in a more informal way, or that they come to the whole enchillada.
The point of the reception is to thank your guests for coming out to share in your day. To invite someone and then tell them no dinner seems wrong to me. But if they aren’t invited the the wedding it is more informal.
Post # 4
I wouldn’t do this… I know you want to include as many people as you can, but it’s kinda insulting to be left out of the ‘more expensive’ portion of the evening. I wouldn’t have even invited people to the reception only, but I see you’ve already done that (with good results, which is great). I think it’s a little wrong to send the message that people are important enough to see you get married and party with you afterward, but not important enough to be served dinner when others are. You know?
Post # 5
Honestly, even though it’s a bit of an etiquette no-no, the fact that you talked to all your friends individually seems fine to me. It’s nice that they understand, and as long as they’re all young and local, it sounds like a great way to celebrate with your friends. But I wouldn’t invite them to the ceremony. It just makes it so much more obvious that they’re excluded from the main reception. However, if you know your friends and think they’d want to come anyway, then that’s your call.
Post # 6
Informal, or whole shebang. Pick your poison.
Post # 7
@Miss OBG: Ditto, those were my exact thoughts. I am usually big on the big “E”, but since you talked to them go for it. I would also not send them a ceremony invite.