Is it okay to "give myself away?"

posted 3 years ago in Family
  • poll: Is it acceptable in modern times to give yourself away at your wedding?
    Yes : (54 votes)
    100 %
    No : (0 votes)
    Depends on the circumstance : (0 votes)
  • Post # 2
    Member
    1040 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I’m sorry to hear about your dad. There is no rule that says you 100% have to have someone walk you down the aisle. Its just a tradition, and one that’s easily broken. Do what’s right for you, and if that means walking down the aisle alone, then go for it. If you feel self conscious walking in alone, you could even walk in with your husband-to-be. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    42546 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    candice7_3:  I am sorry to hear about your Dad.

    Modern brides don’t need anyone to give them away. Just ask your officient to delete that line.

    Post # 4
    Member
    3119 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I’m so sorry to hear about your dad to answer your original question, absolutely it’s okay. It takes guts but you are really the only one who can ‘give’ yourself away anyway. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    889 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I’m so sorry about your dad. 

    For the giving you away part, though, I actually prefer if you’re not being given away as I don’t consider myself a posession that other people can decide about. 

    What I actually really like is the concept of walking down the aisle with your husband-to-be. I always thought I’d do it that way. But as we’re having a first look just before, I think we’ll both need every bit of time “apart” before saying I do to still be all emotional. 

    I believe the Swedish crown princess Victoria walked down the aisle with her husband to be, so if she can do it … 😉

    Post # 6
    Member
    2725 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    First off, I’m so sorry about your dad, and especially sorry that it’s coming at a time that should be so full of joy. 

    TBH, I think walking yourself down the aisle is a nice way to honour your dad. It’s like saying no one else can just step in and take his place…does that make sense, or is it super cheesy?

    Either way, I don’t think there are any hard and fast rules: your wedding, you make the rules. And I wouldn’t think twice about a bride walking herself down the aisle. Do what you feel is right for you.

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    1136 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    candice7_3:  I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, my thougths and prayers are with you and your family xx

    I think it’s absolutely fine to walk yourself down the aisle, i’ve had friends do it at their weddings and no one bat an eyelid!

    I saw another bee the other day had a small photo (it might have been in a locket?) of her dad tied to her bouquet as he had passed and it was her way of having him walk her down the aisle, I thought that was really sweet!

    Post # 8
    Member
    4918 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I’m very sorry about your dad.

    As for walking down the aisle alone, I did it & it was fine.  Your dad will be right beside you in spirit.

    Post # 9
    Member
    58 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    I think it’s absolutely fine and I’m very sorry to hear about your Dad. Maybe your FI could meet you half way and walk the rest of the way with you? 

    Post # 10
    Member
    1750 posts
    Buzzing bee

    It’s really not unusual for brides to walk down the aisle alone. Brides walk themselves down the aisle all the time, and they have for many years. You won’t be doing anything that hasn’t been done before.  

    Post # 11
    Member
    9137 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    See below.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 8 months ago by  beachbride1216. Reason: double post
    Post # 11
    Member
    9137 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    Nothing I can say can alleviate the sadness you have about your dad’s imminent passing.

    There is nothing wrong with walking yourself down the aisle.  Nobody has to “give you away” so I wouldn’t worry about that.  But if you think it might upset you to walk alone I love the idea of having your FI meet you halfway down or having someone else help you down the aisle.  Are you close to your FFIL or one of the groomsmen?  But if you decide to walk down alone it’s not strange at all.

    As for doing something special, if he’s well enough now, why don’t you ask your dad to choose a reading to be read at your wedding ceremony?  You decide whether you want to read it before your wedding or have it be a surprise on your wedding day.  He could even choose a song for you to dance to with your new husband at the reception and you can dedicate it to your dad’s memory.

    Post # 14
    Member
    141 posts
    Blushing bee

    I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, and I understand you not wanting to have someone else stand in his place down the isle. Like another poster said, that in itself would be a nice way to honour him. 

    I just recieved a package from our officiant, and it actually says the traditional aspect of “giving away of the bride is discouraged” and has been replaced in traditional ceremonies by a blessing from family and friends. Perhaps that is something you can discuss with your officiant? 

    Best Wishes!

    Post # 15
    Member
    518 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m so sorry to hear about your father. I think it’s totally fine to walk by yourself, I did for my first marriage. I wanted it that way! No one even commented that I walked by myself.

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