Post # 1
I know that traditionally and ideally your dad gives you away, but in this modern world that is not always the case… I am just wanting some reassurance. Derek and I are getting married in less than 5 months, and my father will not be present unfortunately he will be passing away in the near future. (He is on dialysis, not eligible for transplant, so after years of suffering and due to another recent health concern he has made the decision to stop with his dialysis and pass away peacefully. We only have a few weeks if that :() I have 3 sisters, 2 half brothers (that I am not close with but will be in attendance). I am NOT at all close with my mother and she is currently divorcing my step-dad (her husband number SIX!) And both of my grandfathers have passed away.<br /><br />Is it alright for me to give myself away? The thought of not having my dad (we are so very close) is really breaking my heart, but I know that there is no one else in the world who can take his place…. this too means that we will be skipping the father/daughter dance.<br /><br />I am also looking for unique ways to honor my dad on my special day…. thoughts?
Post # 2
I’m sorry to hear about your dad. There is no rule that says you 100% have to have someone walk you down the aisle. Its just a tradition, and one that’s easily broken. Do what’s right for you, and if that means walking down the aisle alone, then go for it. If you feel self conscious walking in alone, you could even walk in with your husband-to-be.
Post # 3
candice7_3: I am sorry to hear about your Dad.
Modern brides don’t need anyone to give them away. Just ask your officient to delete that line.
Post # 4
I’m so sorry to hear about your dad to answer your original question, absolutely it’s okay. It takes guts but you are really the only one who can ‘give’ yourself away anyway.
Post # 5
I’m so sorry about your dad.
For the giving you away part, though, I actually prefer if you’re not being given away as I don’t consider myself a posession that other people can decide about.
What I actually really like is the concept of walking down the aisle with your husband-to-be. I always thought I’d do it that way. But as we’re having a first look just before, I think we’ll both need every bit of time “apart” before saying I do to still be all emotional.
I believe the Swedish crown princess Victoria walked down the aisle with her husband to be, so if she can do it … 😉
Post # 6
First off, I’m so sorry about your dad, and especially sorry that it’s coming at a time that should be so full of joy.
TBH, I think walking yourself down the aisle is a nice way to honour your dad. It’s like saying no one else can just step in and take his place…does that make sense, or is it super cheesy?
Either way, I don’t think there are any hard and fast rules: your wedding, you make the rules. And I wouldn’t think twice about a bride walking herself down the aisle. Do what you feel is right for you.
Post # 7
candice7_3: I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, my thougths and prayers are with you and your family xx
I think it’s absolutely fine to walk yourself down the aisle, i’ve had friends do it at their weddings and no one bat an eyelid!
I saw another bee the other day had a small photo (it might have been in a locket?) of her dad tied to her bouquet as he had passed and it was her way of having him walk her down the aisle, I thought that was really sweet!
Post # 8
I’m very sorry about your dad.
As for walking down the aisle alone, I did it & it was fine. Your dad will be right beside you in spirit.
Post # 9
I think it’s absolutely fine and I’m very sorry to hear about your Dad. Maybe your FI could meet you half way and walk the rest of the way with you?
Post # 10
It’s really not unusual for brides to walk down the aisle alone. Brides walk themselves down the aisle all the time, and they have for many years. You won’t be doing anything that hasn’t been done before.
Post # 11
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Nothing I can say can alleviate the sadness you have about your dad’s imminent passing.
There is nothing wrong with walking yourself down the aisle. Nobody has to “give you away” so I wouldn’t worry about that. But if you think it might upset you to walk alone I love the idea of having your FI meet you halfway down or having someone else help you down the aisle. Are you close to your FFIL or one of the groomsmen? But if you decide to walk down alone it’s not strange at all.
As for doing something special, if he’s well enough now, why don’t you ask your dad to choose a reading to be read at your wedding ceremony? You decide whether you want to read it before your wedding or have it be a surprise on your wedding day. He could even choose a song for you to dance to with your new husband at the reception and you can dedicate it to your dad’s memory.
Post # 13
beachbride1216: What a beautiful idea about the song in my dads memory! That is definitely something I haven’t heard of or seen myself, thank you so much!
Post # 14
I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, and I understand you not wanting to have someone else stand in his place down the isle. Like another poster said, that in itself would be a nice way to honour him.
I just recieved a package from our officiant, and it actually says the traditional aspect of “giving away of the bride is discouraged” and has been replaced in traditional ceremonies by a blessing from family and friends. Perhaps that is something you can discuss with your officiant?
Post # 15
I’m so sorry to hear about your father. I think it’s totally fine to walk by yourself, I did for my first marriage. I wanted it that way! No one even commented that I walked by myself.