(Closed) Is it rude to invite guests to the reception and not the ceremony?

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: Is it rude to invite the majority of guests to the reception and not the ceremony?
    Yes : (64 votes)
    54 %
    No : (34 votes)
    29 %
    I think they will understand given the day of the week : (20 votes)
    17 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    745 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I’m not sure, honestly. Is there a limit on the ceremony space that you would need to cut guests? I think if you’re asking them to the party, where you’ll feed and entertain them, it shouldn’t be such a horrible thing.

    I know there is a school of thought that you’re asking them to celebrate the wedding that they don’t even get to see, which I can understand. But you’re also doing this on a Friday afternoon, which may be a challenge to attend for guests who work. 

    Personally, I would find it highly rude to be invited only to the ceremony, but I wouldn’t be particularly offended being invited only to the reception. But that’s just me, and there will likely be people who would find it rude. You can check with your family and friends to see how your circle would take it. Every circle is different.

    I know I’m no help at all =/

    Post # 4
    Member
    391 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    The reception is to celebrate what just happened at the ceremony.  In a way, you could look like you’re saying that the person isn’t special enough to witness the whole point of the day but you’re ok with them getting you a gift for it.

    Post # 5
    Member
    609 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I don’t think it’s rude, the ceremony is normally for the closest friends and family

    Post # 6
    Member
    263 posts
    Helper bee

    Why not invite everyone to both, but have separate lines on your RSVP, to subtly hint that you don’t mind if they come to one (the more convenient obviously being the reception) and not the other.

    Post # 7
    Member
    104 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    We considered doing this too, but after more thought, we decided to just invite everyone to both the ceremony and reception.  We were afraid the guests would talk and someone would say, “Oh wasn’t the ceremony so lovely…” to a guest who wasn’t invited to the ceremony and then feelings would be hurt.  I also didn’t want out-of-town guests to travel a far distance just to come to the reception when the real purpose of the celebration is the fact we got married.

    I don’t think it’s rude, but just make sure you feel okay about it.  Also ask yourself, would I feel hurt if anyone only invited me to their reception?

    Goodluck!

    Post # 8
    Member
    609 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Jamiezilla:  completely disagree with you, how is it rude to not invite everyone to the ceremony?

    Post # 10
    Member
    5075 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I don’t like it

    you’re not good enough to witness our ceremony

    but you are good enough to come to the reception and bring us a gift! come on over!

    Post # 11
    Member
    431 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    We only have space for 120 people at our ceremony so not everyone will be able to go. There will be separate invitations for both, and for reception only invites, it will state that we were married in a private ceremony. 

    Not a big deal and not rude at all.

    Post # 13
    Member
    2204 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    @GroovyHippieChick:  That’s exactly how I would feel too.

    The reception is a celebration of the ceremony. By not inviting people, you’re not even giving them the option of whether or not they’ll come. And as a guest, I would feel slighted.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2204 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    It’s ok to have a gap between your ceremony and reception. Just as long as people know about it beforehand. Maybe provide a flyer with local suggestions to kill the time.

    Is it possible to have your ceremony a little bit later?

    The topic ‘Is it rude to invite guests to the reception and not the ceremony?’ is closed to new replies.

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