(Closed) Is it rude to point out an error?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Is it rude to point out a mistake?
    yes. : (27 votes)
    55 %
    no. : (22 votes)
    45 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    6394 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t use titles with my save the dates, either. 🙂 Just ignore the haters.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2512 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I think the way she went around it was wrong.I am the type of person that loves constructive criticism and if she went around it in a way that wasn’t as rude, it would have been ok.

    But either way, I dont think you need titles on std.

    Post # 5
    Member
    994 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    It depends on how it is handled, but in this case, it’s falling on the side of rude. Also, it’s also a bit ignorant b/c you are totally right — STDs are informal and you should not formally address them. I’d be tempted to find something on Martha Stewart’s (or other expert’s) site and forward it back to her 🙂

    Post # 6
    Member
    46160 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    While you might perceive her action as rude, I am sure she was trying to be helpful.

    After all, it is our parents and grandparents who are our teachers.

    Which is ruder? her private email to you? or your mentioning it in your public blog?

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    470 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Definitely rude in this case.  F&*$ etiquette.  I didn’t use titles on my STDs OR my invites (although I did use titles for the doctors and my fiance’s grandparents because his grandma is insane) and anyone who has a problem with that can kiss my ass and avoid my wedding if they’re going to get their panties in a twist over something SO STUPID.  It’s not like you wrote “bitch” on the envelopes or asked them to pay for their own food, for the love of god.

    Post # 8
    Member
    560 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I did not use formal naming for my save the dates, I’m not going to for invitations either!

    Post # 9
    Member
    98 posts
    Worker bee

    This is SO funny, because I had worked on our Save the Dates, had them printed up and stamped them. I then gave the address list to FI to print out labels and mail them. Which he did.

    Well, not long after, my mom was shopping with one of our nearest and dearest friends, my MOH’s mother, kind of half jokingly asked my mom about our STDs. She is like, “What is it with this Mrs. Jones stuff? Since when am I Mrs. Jones? I’m Charlotte. I’ve always been Charlotte.” I couldn’t believe FI had been so formal about it. I think he was just thinking too hard about trying to do the right thing, bless him.

    Moral of the story: darned if you do, darned if ya don’t

    Post # 10
    Member
    9029 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    If my grandmother pointed out a mistake I wouldnt be offended at all,  I would just assume she was trying to be helpful and explain to her that I purposely chose not to use titles for whatever reason…  I hope your grandmother doesnt read your blog..

    Post # 12
    Member
    4415 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Grandmothers have reached an age where rudeness should be dismissed as being eccentric. I would dismiss it and address the actual invitations the way you planned without exception…meaning, address hers the way you would have addressed it if she hadn’t been rude. To address her invitation informally would just be petty, and you’re not petty.

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    1766 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    My MIL was the Etiquette Address Queen during my wedding planning, while I took things less seriously and was called out for abbreviating Massachusetts (oh the horror!) and other faux pas. So under her close watch, I spelled out MA on the rest of the envelopes which promted one of my guests to ask me why the hell I had spelled out Massachusetts when MA fits so much better on the envelope.

    There were also endless discussions about wedding invitation wording. In the end, I went with my casual wording and numerous guests commented on how lovely and refreshingly casual my invitations were.

    Grandma means well, but times are changing.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2410 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Eh, she is your Grandma I just don’t see it as that big of a deal.

    Post # 15
    Member
    5110 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2011

    Im sorry. Honestly may have a lot to do with the generation. But if it makes you feel better. I addressed envalopes informally for my save the dates. Its not the end of the world.

    Post # 16
    Member
    46160 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @Heart-Shaped-Heather: There’s always history. Is it your position that two wrongs make a right?

     

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