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Is it weird that we rarely ever fight? Anyone else?

posted 4 months ago in Emotional

 
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Helper bee
JuneBride_26June2010   26/June/2010  Indiana

Ok - so I was talking to Mr. JuneBride tonight and we were discussing our best friends. She happens to be my MOH and her husband will be one of his groomsmen...

Well - this morning I called her  and she said she'd been balling for the first few hours of the day because they had been fighting.

Thing is - NORMALLY - what they fight over are very childish things. So it got him and I to talking...

Mr. JuneBride and myself RARELY fight and in 2 years / 8 months of being together (plus now technically 3 months of marriage) - I can honestly count two times we got mad at each other - but worked it out that night. And both times it was over the same issue.

I'm just not one to get mad at him for things. Ever. I'm a very complacent person when it comes to my friends and family. I CAN get very mad at co-workers (but don't say anything, i just call my mom up to complain to her - lol - but our relationship is like that, we call each other up when we're mad at other people and vent).

For the most part though I DON'T ever yell at him or get angry - and even he's asked me before WHY i don't and he even thinks it's weird...

I'm just curious if anyone else doesn't ever get angry at their SO. 

 
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eloping     

my hubby and i never faught until we became engaged... then we were snapping at eachother until we decided to elope

since we made that decision - no more arguments, sniping or hurt feelings

we dont argue - yes i get moody and yes his personality is so easy going he usually hangs out in his office until im over it and then we can talk about it. we've only ever once had a full on argument with raised voices and even that didnt last long before we were both apologizing

sometimes he frustrates me or i frustrate him but we both adult enough to say this outloud without making it a big thing

and im glad... i was raised in a alcoholic household where communication was to yell and scream so im not going to have this in my home

 

 
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mandalynn17   June 19, 2010  Medford, OR

Oh sure, my man and I get angry from time to time.  Actually I would say frustrated is a better word.  But we don't fight much.  We tend to work things out quickly, don't let things get too far.  Plus we're both really laid back people.  I think we probably dated for 2 full years before getting in a fight.  We've had more since then, not many though.  I don't think it's weird. Every couple is their own entity and I think it's important to not measure your relationship against other peoples'.

 
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Jenniphyr   August/September, 2012  Alberta, Canada

We hardly ever fight. =) When we do, it's usually me who gets frustrated with him, and he just kind of sits back and lets me gripe at him until I'm done -- and then I feel awful and guilty, and he gets to make me feel better.

 
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JuneBride_26June2010   26/June/2010  Indiana

btw, i just realized there's a related post in relationships...  I just posted a response there - but still curious how many others don't fight! 

 
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bluespurrs   08/07/09  South-central PA, USA, Earth

My FI and I have been together for over 2 and 1/2 years and haven't had a fight yet. Oh we have gotten a little snappish with each other, then we seem to back off and then everything is right as rain again.

 
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sparkle     

We've had one huge fight that resulted in us not talking for a couple hours and one other small argument in the last two years. We both get frustrated but we work through it. 

 
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365   November 3rd, 2012  Ontario

We rarely fight and if we do, it's almsot always worked out in the same day.

 
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Future Mrs M   1-11-11  Michigan

We don't ever really fight either. We have been together almost 2 years and have had one big fight that only lasted not even an hour. Sure I get hissy around that certain time of the month, but he always knows thats why and so he doesn't make a big deal about it. I look at these people who fight ALL the time and i just can't understand why you would want to be in a relationship like that.

 
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mambinki   October 17, 2009  Seattle, WA

We get in little arguments here and there and they are usually resolved quite quickly.  We had to learn HOW to disagree though, which took a bit of time.  We're both pretty calm most of the time, but can get hot tempered when it comes down to it. 

It used to be that I wanted to talk and talk and talk and he needed time to think and felt pressured.  So now we take it kinda easy on eachother when things start to get heated- he'll sit and talk even if he doesn't want to and I'll give him some time to think on it, even if I don't want to.  It actually works quite well. 

 
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moderndaisy   6-12-2010  Live in NYC, Wedding in Philadelphia

It's all about learning how to communicate which avoids fights in the first place. We definitely had to learn, but now it's VERY rare if we even get ina slight argument.

 
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RoddyBride09   09/05/09  Moving to Bethlehem, PA

My FI and I rarely fight as well. They really are disagreements that are always worked out. We never go to bed mad or wake up mad at each other. We always talk about things and never hold it in because that always makes things worse. This really works out for us. 

@Future Mrs M: I completely agree with you. I could definitely not be in a relationship where fighting is the norm. I don't know how those people do it. I feel that puts too much strain on the relationship.

 
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Crash   09/09  

We hardly ever fight either. We've had 2 big fights, one where I very seriously considered breaking up, in our almost 5 years of dating. It's not that we agree on everything, but we do agree on basic values and ways of looking at things. We have friendly, respectful debates about the rest. I have never understood the mentality that fighting keeps it 'interesting.' It's already very interesting!

It's nice to hear there are other couples who rarely fight too. We've just started premarital counseling, and the book and counselor both make us feel like weirdos (or in denial) for not fighting.

 
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Thao   June 19, 2010  Columbus

We rarely fight either ... at first I thought it was strange, since I was used to having, how shall we put it, volatile relationships, but now I'm just happy with the way we communicate. I don't think fighting is a big deal as long as you can resolve it in a timely and thorough way. Congrats on having such a stress-free relationship! 

 
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MyFavorite   June 2009  Springfield, MO

We've been together for 7 1/2 years and have had very few arguments and maybe like one occasion I could possibly classify as a fight.  We usually talk things out pretty quickly and move on.  I used to think it was strange, but now I just think about how lucky I am to not have to deal with fighting and the aftermath!

 
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maryjane   09/09/2009  Grand Forks, ND

I don't think Mr. MJ and I ever fight. Occasionally (and I mean very occasionally/rarely) one of us will hurt the other's feelings, or we'll get on each other's nerves or get a little snappy, but we never yell or argue. We communicate pretty well, and if we disagree, we're good at being respectful about the way we exchange our opinions about things. I too have lots of friends who get in to yelling/crying fights with their significant others though; I don't know how i could deal with that.

 

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