Post # 1
. . .Before we’ve said firmly that we want to be engaged soon? We know we want to marry each other (or at least that’s what I got from when we discussed this somewhat seriously about a month ago) sometime soon after I am done with grad school (if all goes well, 2 years from now). Because I’ve fallen in love with a couple of rings on Etsy, I’ve messaged the sellers with casual inquiries about cost in my size, in the materials (rose gold and moissanite) I like best. BUT I don’t think my SO is ready for engagement! And I want to have another serious conversation with him about it (our expectations of what it means, the fact that I won’t mind being engaged for a couple years if it happens soon, etc.), but have not entirely clarified in my head what I need to say.
Am I weird for pricing out the rings I love!!!??? 😛 holy cow, sorry the pics are so huge!
p.s. these are my current favorites:http://www.etsy.com/listing/94921609/black-diamond-engagement-14k-gold-ring
Post # 3
@Creiddylad: you’re not weird at all for looking at rings–but this is a decision for both of you–not just when to get engaged but he may want to have the experience of picking out your ring himself–some guys are really into that part (mine is) so don’t remove him from the equation
Post # 4
I think everyone likes to look at rings, heck I did that when I was single. Just save pictures of what you like for later, but don’t start planning to buy or anything. You’ll get your ring when it’s the right time, and if you know your SO isn’t ready you don’t want to come off like you’re in it for the jewelry.
Post # 5
Whilst I think it is good to have an idea on costs and what you love for rings, you may have rushed ahead just a teeeeny bit given you think he is not ready for this to happen so soon.
Next time you chat about it I would mention that you could send him some pictures of rings you love but dont talk about the pricing of it.
Post # 6
Don’t worry about looking at rings, it’s normal! It’s great that you’re figuring out what you want. I would not, however, email the sellers because you might be wasting their time if it doesn’t happen soon.
Post # 7
Those rings are so unique! That’s awesome. I think it’s totally normal to start looking and becoming educated on what you want. Make a folder on your computer and save a bunch of pics, but definitely let this be something that he decides to do when he’s ready. 🙂
Post # 8
I agree, I don’t think it’s weird to get an idea of styles you like and the price. However, I would be careful not to get too involved since you haven’t gotten the go-ahead from your SO. Honest and open communication are key and when you’re ready to have the conversation, then you can bring it up. But until you and your SO are on the same page, I’d keep the ring searching to a minimum. Trust me, it only makes waiting seem so much longer sometimes!
Post # 9
Ok, thanks bees.
I am definitely not looking to buy anything. . . would not do so unless we had agreed it was time.
I asked two sellers about pricing (despite my own reservations about wasting their time) because I felt that, when it is time for my SO and I to talk about this, it would be important for me to know the prices of the rings I find most wonderful.
I don’t think he’s the kind of guy who would feel the need to pick it out himself. Plus he knows I am very opinionated about jewelry, and fashion in general (I design and make clothes and jewelry for myself sometimes).
I agree with not going too far with this since it may look as if I’m in it for the bling– I’m not, of course! My SO and I are happy with each other and see ourselves together for the long run, and getting engaged is seeming like the logical next step. Thus I, in my silly way, spend some time dreaming over beautiful jewelry that I imagine us using to promise to someday marry one another.
Thanks everyone for the replies! (I was overwhelmed with school and work for the past week; sorry for not replying sooner).
Post # 10
I don’t see anything wrong wtih this. I actually have a Pinterest for rings.It’s mainly because I am one of those people who doesn’t feel comfortable with a choice until I’ve examined just about every possibility….