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Wait, you're madly in love with someone other than your significant other?
No no no!!! It always said WAS, I promise lol. I'm madly in love with my SO. But I cant help but feel a little sad about this. I can't explain it.
@Young.love: I think it's normal to feel a little twinge when an old flame gets engaged/married, but if it's really bugging you, it might be a good idea to reevaluate how you really feel about this guy, your current SO, and why it's upsetting you so much.
@Young.love: A couple questions to clear up a few points: Are you sad that he is engaged and thus no longer on the market, or are you just sad that someone else you know is engaged before you? Would you feel the same if it were a close friend or relative (male or female) who was recently engaged? Or are you just sad that someone from your romantic past is making progress towards starting the next chapter of their life, and you're not?
I don't intend to offend or be mean, please don't take it that way. I'm blunt, it's one of my faults :)
It's not bugging me to the point where I'm like OMG ITS THE END OF THE WOOOOOORLD! But there is just that little cold stab there.
It's a little bit of both I guess. But I am so insanely in love with J. I just can't help but feel a little sad.
I feel the same way when the ditzy girls in high school get engaged. They wanted to date all the boys and never got to and now they have finaces? Huh?
But an ex of mine just got engaged. And I had a tiny pang of jealousy until I realized I'm much better off. He has no direction in his life. I have a full-time job/career. BF has a full-time job/career so we will be much better off financially when we take the plunge than these people might be. And that makes me feel better.
I dunno. I think it's somehow programmed into girl DNA that we feel that little cold stab whenever an ex gets into another relationship, or gets engaged, or gets married, or gets a baby.... Like no matter what the situation was with the guy. If he was great but it just didn't work out, obviously there's that little "What if..?" that pops up. If he was a douche, somehow we still get the stab out of, I don't know... disgust that we were ever in the position of the new girl in question, or maybe a "How dare he break my heart and then end up HAPPY!!" stab. There's lots of stabs, I think. And they somehow do not disappear no matter how happily in love we are with our current guy. It's the weirdest.
The most ridiculous stab for me is the, "OMG! He's in a relationship?!? Who is this chick... *click* -- omg whatever. She has ugly [insert physical attribute with a slight imperfection]."
You know you've done this too... lol.
@littlemissmango: OMG!!! lmao!!! that is hillarious! I've done that once! But only because my Ex, started dating a girl that looks related to him and I found it a bit disturbing.
Maybe you should just delete him. I'm not friends with any of my serious exes on FB - why would I be? We're not close anymore (and sometimes I wonder if we ever really were) and I would not want it to cause problems anyhow. Unless you're still bff's with the guy who really cares? It's like good luck buddy, congrats... now moving on. :)
@littlemissmango totally nailed it. I don't think your feelings have anything to do with your current relationship. I found out both of my exes were engaged within weeks of one another. Now, I wouldn't take either of them back if you paid me, however, I still felt that little "really? They're getting married? To someone other than ME????" feeling. I think it's more a matter of dealing with past rejection again than any sort of residual feelings.
I absolutely adore my FI and wouldn't give him up for anything in this universe. Doesn't mean I'm not going to get a little catty about a chick I was dumped for or replaced with. I think we're all a little territorial that way, despite our exclamations to the contrary. It's just human nature.
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Tonight, someone who I had a very flirtatious and close relationship with has gotten engaged. This is a person who I never had an actual reltionship with, but there was some serious attraction...And I was madly in love with him, plain and simple.
Anyway...We have kept in touch through facebook over the years, and tonight...the dreaded moment came..... "Blank Blank has gone from 'In a relationship' to 'Engaged!'"
I'm so happy for him, but at the same time, I feel a twinge of sadness. Not jealousy over the fact that he is engaged and I'm not...He's older than me, why shouldn't he be??! But it's still giving me that feeling in the pit of my stomach. Is it wrong for me to be feeling like this? I feel like I'm betraying J or something.