Is my bridesmaid getting out of hand?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
7281 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

I don’t get it. What, exactly, is bothersome here?

Post # 3
Member
42472 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

bananchik:  If you don’t want to share your vendors, don’t share your vendors.

 

Post # 6
Member
3941 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

bananchik:   She went dress shopping after purchasing a dress?   Why?

Will your photographer have time for an engagement shoot?  Will your friend be paying part of the photographer’s travel expenses?  

Post # 8
Member
3941 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

bananchik:  If she isn’t paying for part of your photographer’s travel expenses I don’t think she has any right to use your photographer for a photoshoot at the destination location.

Have you given your photographer a heads-up?  Your friend may tell your photographer that you gave her the contact info implying you are ok with the arrangement.

Your friend seems to be a real boundary pusher.

Post # 9
Member
42472 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It would be very unethical of your photographer to accept other work when you are paying for them to fly in to the DW.

I would contact the photographer and let them know that you are not ok with them doing other work that weekend.

Post # 10
Member
62 posts
Worker bee

I think she is being a little unreasonable. It almost seems like she is a little lazy to do her own researching and planning and just using whats already ready because you put it together. I think you should talk to her nicely and let her know that you feel a little uncomfortable with her having an engagement shoot on a weekend that is supposed to be about celebrating your wedding. I think it is okay for her to use your photographer on another day though-if I had a good experience with one, I would definitely reccommend them to my friends!

Post # 12
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

I agree with comments about sharing expenses, i think it’s a little unreasonable that she would assume there will be time and no cost for her to do so.

If there is time and she’s willing to help with cost, I think it would make sense that it benefits both of you.

Post # 13
Member
689 posts
Busy bee

I’d ask her to maybe share the expense of the photographer’s travel if she plans on using that photographer at your destination wedding. No free rides on my dime.

Post # 14
Member
7075 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If she wants to use the same photographer, I think that’s fine. Doing it during your wedding time, not cool. However, I would assume if you are paying for your photographer’s flight and hotel that they would not take on work for someone else. That would be very unprofessional IMO.

Post # 15
Member
7400 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I don’t think you get to dictate what the photographer does outside of your contract hours. So if the photographer wants to shoot another session whilst at the location for your wedding, as long as it is outside fo your contract hours then they should be free to do so. Unless it was specified in your contract that the whole time they are at your location they will not photograph anything else I am pretty sure you don’t have anything you can rightly complain about.

Your friend is under no obligation to share the travel costs with you. Those costs are something that you chose to bore when you booked the photographer. What your friend and the photographer work out for their contract is up to them. 

  • This reply was modified 2 years, 7 months ago by  j_jaye.
Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors