Post # 1
So, a couple questions.
1) our RSVP deadline was yesterday (though we also gave folks the option of not mailing an RSVP but emailing us an answer, and only 4 or 5 RSVP’s have come via email so far!). And we have only received approximately 34 RSVP’s out of about 70 we sent! 16 have been YES but 3 of those are in our bridal party so I’m not sure how much those “count.” Is this a bad ratio of YES for only 70 sent?
2) why haven’t we received more RSVP’s total yet? Our wedding is 3 weeks from now, basically, the RSVP deadline was yesterday, and about 35 RSVP’s are MIA. IS this normal?!?
Post # 3
Hmm, we are date twins and I have all but like 6 rsvp’s back out of 105. Our due date is next week. It does seem a little odd that you only have like half of yours back! Good luck!
Post # 4
I would be making phone calls! That happened to us as well, and we were amazed at how many people were like ohhhh it’s sitting right here on the counter!
Post # 5
I agree 100% with @MsBlueBerryBee – call EVERYONE who has not responded yet.
Post # 6
My wedding is after yours and I have all but 15 RSVPs. I would start calling them as soon as you can.
Post # 7
I would be making calls to those who have yet to respond. This way you can give your caterer a pretty accurate head count
Post # 8
If your deadline was yesterday, some people may have put it in the mail yesterday. I would wait until the weekend to begin making phone calls. But definitely call people to follow-up.
Post # 9
Thanks to everyone who has responded so far! Some varied opinions.
I’m thinking, we’ll allow people to RSVP up till the 20th or 21st, but then we’ll start calling if there are still stragglers. Because our deadline to let caterers know, etc. our headcount is two weeks prior to wedding — Sat the 25th of Sept, actually.
I was really wondering, if our RSVP count was slim compared to other brides with wedding dates and RSVP deadlines similar to ours . . . . I was feeling neglected. LOL
Post # 10
LadySunshine–our RSVP return response was not even 20%!! It was ridiculous. We have had to call most people to get a response….etiquette is dead, what can I say! LOL!
We started calling the day before the RSVP date b/c there was no way they were all going to come in the day of. and they didnt.
good luck collecting them. this has been the most annoying and stressful part of planning for me! hope yours goes well 🙂
Post # 11
gurlwithapen — OH my WORD! A meager 20% return rate for your RSVP’s? That’s ridiculous! Man, makes me feel ok with the nearly 40% return rate we’ve had thus far!! You’re right, etiquette has practically died with most of our society. So sad. 🙁
I’ve pretty much decided with my fiance that we’ll see what we get between now and the 20th or 21st, and then start calling folks. Because the two-week minimum before our wedding is 25th!
Thanks for all your responses. I appreciate it! We’re still keeping our “fingers crossed”!!! I definitely don’t want to have to call all these folks!! I feel like I’m having to nag them to come!! GRRRRR
Post # 12
update . . . since my last post, we may have received ONE more RSVP. That is IT. So . . . guess what we have to do tonight? Look through all RSVP’s and make sure we have them all down, then start calling folks!! Grrr I hate that. Because I have NEVER been a phone person in general . . . and because I think people should use basic manners to respond. We gave them two EASY options — mail one, or email to my FI’s address and that would be even easier!!! What?!?!?
Post # 13
ugh.. what a headache!! can split them up between your FI and even your parents or his (if it’s family members that need reminding) and man the phones!
Post # 14
You’re nicer (or way more optimistic) than I am. Our RSVPs were due 9/20. I split the list among the moms, the groom, and myself, and we started calling/emailing on 9/21. I figured if they hadn’t sent the pre-stamped card by the deadline, it wasn’t going to happen. We’re only missing 4 now, and 3 of those are close friends who’ve been in contact but have extenuating circumstances that make a firm answer impossible right now. Overall, I think we’ll end up with about a standard 80% YES rate. I’m very pleased.
Post # 15
@LadySunshine: Maybe giving guests multiple options was your downfall? Instead of immediately filling out the card and sending it back, many may have just said to themselves “Oh, I can email it! I’ll just do that later!” and then put the card down, walked away, and forgot about both options…
Post # 16
We had about a 30% return! Etiquette has vanished!! And just think how much stamp cash could have gone back into my budget!!!