Weddingbee boards

Hello Hive!

I’ve been a long time lurker and only recently joined the boards.

My question for the hive today isn’t actually related to my wedding (I’m a waiting bee) but that of a friend of mine (let’s call her Bride M).  Bride M got engaged a few months ago, is getting married later this year, and has picked 2 bridesmaids (let’s call them BM T and BM K).  The other player in this story is another girl in our group of friends (we’ll call her Friend H, or FR H).  BM K and FR H are basically attached at the hip, with FR H being more out spoken.

BM T has been saying recently that she thinks FR H is overstepping her territory and trying to take on bridesmaid duties when it isn’t her place – by seemingly inviting herself to bridal shows (that hadn’t been mentioned to BM T), trying to take over the planning of an engagement party BM T and BM K are throwing, and BM T feels that she’s being excluded and is not happy about that. 

I suggested to BM T that FR H is kind of like that (this isn’t the first time she’s tried to take over things), and that she should try to not let that get to her and instead make it overly, abundantly clear to Bride M that she’s very excited for the wedding, to be a bridesmaid and wants to be involved and help in any way that she can.  I thought that things were cooling down until today.

This coming weekend we’re having a girl’s weekend in Niagara Falls and FR H and I were discussing this morning how we’re all going to get there and back from Toronto – who was driving and what cars were going.  In this discussion FR H mentioned that Bride M was thinking of going over the border to look at wedding dresses in the States, and that she (FR H) would of course being going because in that case she would be driving.  This however is not correct because if that were to happen BM T could drive the car that then went to Buffalo, and I could drive the car that went back to Toronto.

To top it all off – I’m about 98% sure that the dress shopping plan was never mentioned to BM T. 

So long story short – is FR H overstepping her territory?  And should I tell BM T about this potential plan?  I know her feelings will be very hurt, but I think she has the right to know…

(Sorry it's long - congrats and thanks if you made it through!)

Thanks bees! 

I have been staying out of it, thanks for the reassurance I'm not being a bad friend to BM T!