Is there any polite way to clue in a clueless friend?

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
5932 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@MichiganGirl24:  Not without hurting her feelings.  Self image is a mysterious and powerful thing, if she feels good wearing the things she does, more power to her!  Its just not your place or problem to sit her down and make her aware of what she shouldn’t be wearing….plus, she might not have the money to buy new things and is just a little strained at the seams from the holidays….

 

Post # 4
Member
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

There’s no nice way to come out and just tell your friend you think they should try to dress differently. If she brought it up you could tell her “you know I used to have that issue too and then so and so clued me in”. But you can’t just come out and be like hey, that muffin top you have, I know how to fix it.

Post # 5
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

If you know her size maybe you can buy her a pair and fib a little…I’d call her and tell her you’re buying jeans and they’re buy one get one free but there’s only one color in stock and ask her if she wants a free pair…say something like otherwise you might just donate them but that they’re cute.  Give them to her and see if she likes the fit.

Post # 6
Member
2114 posts
Buzzing bee

@MichiganGirl24:  The only thing I can suggest is going shopping with her and pick a few items you would think would suit her (or ask an associate in the store). When she tries them on make it a point to tell her how great she looks in them and she MUST buy them (of course, only if she doesnt actually look good in them). it may get the ball rolling.

Post # 8
Member
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@MichiganGirl24:  I wouldn’t say anything. It would be one thing if she was an XXXL trying to squeeze into a S/M, but your description makes it sound to be like she might not even be a size down (it sounds like a “between sizes” problem to me). You can go shopping with her and try to convince her to try on high rise jeans, but there is no nice to tell someone that they don’t know how to dress themselves.

Post # 9
Member
7075 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Unless she asks for your opinion I’d keep it to yourself.

Post # 10
Member
5932 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@MichiganGirl24:  Does it really bother you that much?  Or are you just tyring to help her before someone mean says something to her, like in a bar or something….

Post # 13
Member
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@MichiganGirl24:  The only thing you could say really is “do you like MY new jeans, I love them, I could not figure out why i always had a muffin top and this lady told me etc etc” and hope she doesn’t think you’re hinting at hers

Post # 15
Member
6048 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Do you guys go shopping together ever?  I was thinking maybe make a stop and get re-fit for jeans with her there, she might be willing to give it a go if she sees some one else doing it.  

Post # 16
Member
5932 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@MichiganGirl24:  Yeah…I get it…kind of, but unless there’s a really smooth way to bring it up, that’s just a room full of bear traps waiting to be stepped on.

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