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If you ask his opinion you have to be prepared to take it into consideration.
That's what marriage is all about. You can compromise and still take the time to find something you love. Or, you could agree that you get to pick some things and he chooses others.
My FI is really really involved as well. Some times I wish he would just let me plan it but he has to be involved. He has let me do some things to my liking. He let me put together the outfits for our e-pics and he is letting me run wild with our STD. However, he did pick the invitations ( I like them but I want something else) and the venue was really about him and his family being able to come close. I would just have a talk and put your foot down and say we have to come to an agreement or its a no-go!
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We've been planning our wedding now for about 6 months and have another 10 to go til the big day. We've been pretty much on the same page with our general idea, but lately he's been nit-picking at everything I suggest or try to plan.
We registered a couple weeks ago and it took forever because I would suggest something like, "oh, what about this?" and he scrunched up his face and said "Umm, NO." Then he would suggest something way off the wall design wise (compared to everything we currently have), and I wouldn't agree. We went through this with china, linens, silverware, even glasses to the point where we went to 4 different stores before we found one we could both agree on liking. Just seems weird that he is all of a sudden super concerned with how a fork feels in his hand while he's using it, or the color of the rim of the fine china.
I've been going crazy emailing and meeting with caterers (mind you our wedding is 3.5 hours away from where we live) and finally got a proposal from my #1. I sent to FI and he writes back, yeah, maybe we should look at a few more, I wouldn't eat anything off that menu, (even though it was the same beef, chicken, pasta standard we had agreed on just with garnish/flavors he didn't like - definitely things that could be easily modified.) AND - it was way below our budget!
Even talking about our save the dates, he wants a post card, where as I was thinking something in an envelope. I proposed a design that I absolutely love, and he does the scrunched up nose thing and shoots me down... I could go on and on with these examples.
I'm just getting so frustrated that we're not on the same page. Its never been like this before in our relationship, but the wedding planning is really bringing it out in both of us. I tried to explain my frustration to him last night, and he says "well, its really all about compromise, I hate the idea of doing a "first look" but you wanted it so I gave in. You have to give in to some of my wants too... Or do you just want me to step back and let you plan the whole thing yourself?" Whoa - not a fun night.
Help me here, am I overreacting? How do we find a happy medium? I feel like this meeting in the middle thing is giving us a whole bunch of stuff that we're both like "eh, it'll do" about and not "OMG I love it!" OR, we have somethings that one of us (apparently) hates, and one of us loves...