Post # 1
So FI and I are getting the ball rolling with the planning. Securing a place and a date this weekend, most likely!
We’ve announced our bridal party, and all of my maids are super stoked! I really feel blessed to have such wonderful women in my life.
I tend to run on really high anxiety. I freak myself out about stuff, get super worked up and feel overwhelmed often. I’m thinking that in regards to wedding planning: I need to let go a little and pick my battles. There are certain things I don’t and won’t care about: what the cake looks like, not horribly concerned with flowers, etc.
Would it be an absolutely horrible idea to allow the maids to have some free reign with their dresses? If I assign a color, and a fabric and a length (sage green, jersey or chiffon – just not shiny satin, knee length) is it safe for me to let them go to town? I have petites and plus sizes, 5’0″ -6’1″. I don’t want to make people wear something they’re not comfortable in. I also don’t necessarily want to wait to get everyone together and have a big trip to the bridal salon.
Am I being negligent, or is this a good decision?
Post # 3
@hazeljayne: If I decide to have a bridal party, I would take this route as well. You mentioned that your girls have different body types and it is definitely difficult for one dress to flatter everyone. Maybe have them pick a dress and let them show it to you so you can get a feel for how they will all look together?
Post # 4
@hazeljayne: if you’re VERY particular about the color/ fabric being the same, I would say pick a designer that tehy can choose their own dress from. A lot of designers use the same fabrics in a variety of dresses in all sorts of lengths, necklines, etc. Your girls would still get the option of choosing the best dress for them, while still falling in line with your vision!
Post # 5
@hazeljayne: good decision! I was a bridesmaid and the bride did just that! We all went shopping and picked a designer we all liked (Bill Levkoff) and we all picked a chiffon dress and they were ordered in the same color. If you don’t mind different shades of green, just give totally free reign. Mismatched can look awesome! I found the one of yellow dresses on Pinterest!
Post # 6
@hazeljayne: I think it is a very generous and thoughtful idea. As long as you give them parameters within which to operate, they will each be able to find a dress they feel good in.
Don’t just tell them a color though, if you really want the colors the same. Give them a paint swatch of the color so they have something to carry with them when shopping.
Ask them to run the dress by you when purchasing. Easy enough for them to send you a quick pic so you don’t end up with a navel baring deep V neckline.
Post # 7
I think it’s a great decision. A coworker of mine did this for her wedding and it worked out great. I think it’s a good idea to provide them with some examples of what you would like to see, or even some stores with styles that would work well.
Post # 8
@hazeljayne: I say go to’er! Some of the coolest pictures I have ever seen have semi matching bridesmaid dresses. I think if you pick the colour, fabric and length, even if they aren’t perfect matchy matchy it’ll still look great!
Post # 9
@hazeljayne: What?! You’re not being negligent! I think letting your BMs decide what they want to wear is the best decision you could have made, it’s unlikely you will be able to find one dress that all of your BMs love, look great in and feel comfortable wearing.
Post # 10
I might pick a designer too, just so the fabrics and colors match. It drives me nuts when every bridesmaids has a slightly different color dress. And a length too- it is likely that they would wind up picking short because they are cheaper and more rewearable, but if only one picked a long dress, it might be kind of weird unless she was MOH
Post # 11
- Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI
I picked a designer because my dress had a little color in it and we wanted the color of the BM dresses to match but I let each girl pick their own dress in that color once we all decided on a fabric and length.
This is what I ended up with…all of the girls were VERY happy about being able to pick out their own dress. The downside was two of the girls were not able to try on their dresses. My plus size bridesmaid didn’t fit any samples and one other bridesmaid liked a dress that no store near us had a sample of so we just hope it works out when the dresses actually come in but I think we’ll be okay.
Post # 12
I was a MOH at my best friends wedding and she did that and it was so AWESOME. I was fine to pick a dress that fit my size and was in my comfort level while keeping the bride happy by staying in a color/length boundaries. Plus the pictures look great since everyone is happy and confident in the dress they have on!
Post # 13
@hazeljayne: Sounds wonderful…it’s what I am doing! I gave them a brand, fabric, color and length and told them to have at. I am not in the business of micomanaging what people wear…in the grand scheme it’s a small detail.
Post # 14
I think you should also give them a designer and the designer’s specific color. Otherwise it can be overwhelming to them.
Post # 15
Yep I’m doing something similar (a little less specific)…
I went shopping with my MOH, she found a great teal dress she loves (for $25 too!!!!) and my other bridesmaids are going to pick blue dresses that will look good with it.
Done, done, and done.
Post # 16
This is exactly what I did. Only in yellow. I asked my bridesmaids to get a yellow, knee length dress in a non-shiny fabric. I think one went to David’s Bridal, one went to a private local bridal salon and one got her dress at Macy’s. They looked great together. And they could find something that looked good on them and that they could afford. And I didn’t have to worry about it. It was great!