Post # 1
So today our pastor calls FI and tells him “I don’t want you to worry, but… I will be travelling to South Carolina to preach on New Year’s Eve. I didn’t want you to hear it from anyone else and get upset. Everything will be fine, I’ll be back in time to officiate your wedding. Just in case, I have made arrangements with Reverend Noideawhoheisbecauseyouhavenevermethim to act as a backup in case I get delayed. But don’t worry, it’ll be fine.”
Ummm… We are getting married on January 1st. In New Jersey. She told FI she is driving to avoid any weather-related flight delays. Okay, but couldn’t winter weather affect your driving too, Pastor?And unless I am missing something, isn’t it a minimum 10-hour drive?
I told FI that I don’t want some random reverend we’ve never met to marry us & I would prefer my cousin who is licensed and ordained (which Pastor knows) to marry us. FI said it’d be rude to tell her we don’t want the backup she is providing. I guess we are going to be rude then because I want my cousin to do it if she can’t.
I’m just trying to remain calm and think positively… I keep telling myself that we are having all of these challenges now so that things will go smoothly on the actual day.
Woo sah! Thanks for letting me vent, Bees!
Post # 3
I don’t think it’s an omen but I do think you should go ahead and make arrangements to meet the replacement.
Post # 4
I would do the same thing…have the cousin on standby! I would be VERY worried if my officiant were travelling 10 hrs away — in the middle of winter! As for her being upset, I really don’t think she will be. I would simply explain to her the same way you explained one here…you don’t want someone you have never met to perform your ceremony so if something happens and she doens’t make it back then you will have your cousin on stand-by. I hope everything works out! 🙂
Post # 5
@tootietoo2: Do you know what time the pastor is preaching on New Year’s Eve? Maybe she’s preaching NYE morning and has all day NYE to drive.
I’d still have a contingency plan, just in case. (Just saw you have your cousin).
Let her know if she doesn’t make it you will not pay and you already have a contingency plan.
Post # 6
That is a really long trip…but let her know that you’d prefer to have your cousin officiate in case she is delayed and not her back up. I don’t think it’s rude if you don’t phrase it rudely!
Post # 7
It’s not an omen, she’s just being polite by letting you know. I would let her know that you would prefer your cousin to officate over a stranger, I’m sure she’d understand and it’s not rude at all. Are you going to have a rehearsal on NYE or before that? If it’s supposed to be NYE, I would bring that up to her.
Post # 8
That is annoying. I would definitely meet with the replacement to be on the safe side. Maybe you will really like the replacement and choose to have him do your ceremony anyway!
Somewhat related, a few months ago, I met with our photographer to go over some stuff. She asked if we could meet at the church on December 29 so she could check it out, etc. I said sure, and she mentioned that she was studying in Japan for the next 6 months, and would be flying in on the 28th – 3 days before my wedding!
Post # 9
i dont think its an omen, but a little irresponsible. i would def tell her thanks but no thanks, we absolutely want you to marry us but if you cannot make it i’d rather have my cousin step in. i dont know why that would be a problem, and i dont think its rude….rude is having someone substitute for you when you’ve already made a commitment.