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I have a wedding of a friend at the end of March I was planning to wear a certain dress to. I showed it to another friend just mentioned "do you think {the bride} will think that is too white?" -- I hadn't thought of it! ... let me know what you think!
(I'm in the middle -- it's the white/silver/gold dress)
I am usually not sensative to this white dress rule at all, but for some reason, the all over whiteness, and the sheen to it make it seem, not inappropriate, but definitely an awkward choice for someone else's wedding. So sorry, I hate finding a new outfit!
In the picture here it does look a little too white. Are you close with the bride? If so, shoot her an email and ask. If not, I would go with a different dress. It may look different in person, but if you show up in any of their pictures later on, it may look like it does here.
Hmm, I have to say, if someone brought up in a nice way, it really means that as soon as they saw it they probably thought OMG YOU SHOULDNT WEAR THAT TO A WEDDING, you know? It's a cute dress for sure but I don't think I'd have the gall to wear that to a wedding!
Also I never liked those "what about asking the bride?" things... I just feel like I'd have to be too nice to someone if they asked me that kind of question, when really I'd feel like saying no. Gosh I know I sould so harsh! I'm soooo not trying to be... I just feel passionately about white at a wedding. lol.
As a rule of thumb, I try to stear clear of too much white to anyone's wedding. The most white I have worn was an off white halter top. With that being said, I don't think you could get away with it. Since there is the possbility of doubt...you'd be safer not to do it. Do you have an up close picture, to be sure?
Oh, I want to add that I totally agree with Laboroflove, I would HATE if someone emailed me with a pic of their dress and asked me if I would be okay to wear to my wedding. Unless it was a wedding gown, I would absolutely lie and say "of course!" just to be nice. I would wonder why they would wear something that they felt warrented an email to me in the first place!
If I were going to take offense I wouldnt have posted! I appreciate everyone's honesty! I do have to say I am shocked by the fact that everyone said yes so quickly!! I had someone wear a very similar dress to my wedding and someone asked me after if I was upset about it and I was like umm nope, didnt even notice! Here's a closer picture. It probably also looks so white in comparison to everyone's dark dress in that photo. It's really much more metallic. But I am definitely re-thinking this!
dress2.JPG (46 KB, 47 downloads) 2 years old
Yeash, so I still say cute dress, but find something else. The Bride might not notice, but it's more of a respect thing for me.
Hmm.
I still say no based on the fact that it's more than 50% white, and the fact that in pics, it could look as white as it did above. Sorry! I know it sucks trying to find the perfect thing to wear.
I guess If you have to ask you probably shouldn't...... just incase since we don't know the bride.
Gosh you're so gorgeous! And I do love the dress, I love gold anything. Also, have relatives in Humarock--GREAT PLACE. It does help with the closer pic, there's def more gold than I originally saw...
The first pic, I was thinking no, the second, I'd say yes. It's not an obvious no (especially because it's short), but I'd probably lean towards erring on the side of caution and skipping it, especially since someone else questioned it.
Really? I was thinking that this wouldn't have been a big deal. But I guess to be safe maybe a different dress would be a good idea, since everyone else seems to think so. :)
Also, I wouldn't care if you wore that to my wedding, but what is this bride like? Some really care, others, not so much....
@spaniel - I'm with you! I just honestly didnt think it was an issue at all until my friend mentioned. So I was like "hey i'll check with weddingbee why not" oh man!
@all - thanks! looks like i might have to find a new dress!
Personally, I'm not a fan of the "no white" rule at weddings, but so many other people take offense to it. Because of that, I will never, ever wear anything that resembles white to a wedding so that other guests don't mark me as the "Oh my gosh! She's wearing white! Who does she think she is!" girl.
I would be safe and start shopping :)
Yeah I dont think it is a big deal if you wear it. I wouldn't have cared if one of my guests wore this to my wedding. It likely woudnt have even occurred to me! Super cute dress!
Very cute- but I would go with something you are 100% sure of just in case!
personally, I am one of those who IS a fan of the "wearing white" rule and ya, I'd be mad. I'm really sorry, but even as a vendor I get pissed of FOR my client when I see guests come in wearing a mostly white dress.
On this one, I think the dress is MEANT to be the "white" party dress so I say, no.
It looks nothing like a wedding dress or anything that would compete with one. If someone wore it to my wedding, I wouldn't mind at all.
Whatever you do, I wouldn't email the bride. 9 times out of 10 the bride isn't going to give you her honest answer anyway because she doesn't want to sound ilke a "bridezilla." But based on the overwhelming number of brides on here that are against the dress, she probably will be too. Also, it's just going to cause her added stress and probably, irritation. :)
as a bride i would not notice but you never know. i would never wear a full white/cream dress to a wedding. pretty dress though...
whatever you do...do NOT ask the bride if it is ok. this will only bring attention to it and make her think that you possibly are trying to offend her on purpose. i know that sounds kind of silly but some ppl really freak out during their wedding. just save yourself and her the stress and wear something else.
have fun...you are beautiful and i am sure you will find a fabulous dress for the wedding you can rewear
I wouldn't wear it - it's not worth it. It's too white, people will be staring at you all night wondering why you're trying to upstage the bride. Sell the dress on Weddingbee, I'm sure other brides would love to wear it to a bach party!
Just say no to anything in the family of white... as soon as you even question maybe... the answer is no don't do it!
Honestly it's not "white" but it skims the line of where you may feel like the bride would be slightly offended. So I'd say no too. It's a cute dress, just not a cute dress for someone else's wedding. Sorries!
Really, the great majority of you would be offended if someone came wearing this dress and think they're trying to upstage you? But it doesn't look anything like a wedding dress...This one really surprised me. Guess this is just another wedding rule I don't understand. Wow, now that I think about it, I must've really committed a faux pas when I wore a white strapless dress with a blue floral pattern and blue sash to a wedding two years ago! I'm certain though, noone was even remotely staring at me, noone seemed upset, noone confused me for the bride, and I definitely didn't take any attention away from her. I would think the only valid reason for being upset at a guest's outfit would be if they wore something noticably skimpy showing lots of skin because really, that's the only way any woman can possibly upstage a beautiful bride.
On my wedding day (previous wedding) I felt like a gorgeous princess, anyone else in the room were just ordinary people there to adore me :) I never even noticed what anyone else was wearing. Maybe I'm too laid-back and confident though.
I agree with meliss. I don't really understand the whole can't wear white to a wedding thing. It's not like it's an all white dress or a long gown so I don't understand why it would be a problem. I say if you want to wear it, go ahead.
I would not mind if you wore that to my wedding... other brides may feel differently though. I agree with @meliss and @summergirl... I don't get why some brides would feel "upstaged" by something so trivial. I'm going to concentrate on having a rockin' time at my wedding with my guests and my new hubby, not on what everyone else is wearing. To each their own I suppose...
I probably won't notice what anyone else is wearing... but if someone asked me if they could wear that dress, I would be uncomfortable saying no....
So yeah, you might want to chose another dress :)
that dress has lots of silver. i dont really consider that really white. i wouldnt care.
I think it is white enough that YOU might feel awkward all night because people (maybe the bride, maybe others, maybe both) would think it was borderline.
I also would suggest NOT emailing a picture...I think I'd find it weird if someone did that. If you have to ask...prob shouldn't wear it! Sorry, it is a super cute dress, but I bet you'll be more confident and have more fun in a dress that you don't have to question!
Think of it this way:
1) you might offend your friend and other guests
2) you can wear a different dress
Would it really be a hardship to wear a different dress?
Eeeeek, after reading all of these I am realizing how innappropriate a dress was that I wore to a wedding three years ago could have been percieved...To be fair, I'd never heard of that rule, it was waaaay before I knew anything about weddings and didn't think about it until after I had bought the dress but it was definitely white with a scattered flower print on it...WHOOOPS!
I honestly think it's fine but clearly I am in the minority with that opinion!
I wouldn't give a flying flip if you wore that dress to my wedding. In fact, I'd probably seek you out and compliment you - it's super cute. Personally, I wanted everyone to wear what they felt the best/most beautiful in. It just wasn't about made up rules and respect to me.
I think it's fine since it has a silver design all over it, so it's more silver-white, than white.
I think it's a pretty dress, but not for a wedding, sorry. The bride probably won't notice, or mind, but others might and the fact that it's white with metallic colors, it's not understated as it should be for someone elses wedding. I guess it's more of a respect thing for me too. If someone wore that dress in any other party, it would be perfect and it would get many compliments - but isn't that the thing you're not supposed want to get in someone else's wedding? But of coarse it's all very subjective and just an opinion.
Wow!!!
I started this at the end of my day of work yesterday and I can't believe the response I've gotten. To be honest when I bought the dress it was a bit out of my budget for my rehearsal, but I said to myself, "Well I will definitely wear it to Sue's wedding" ... and to be honest I think I still might.
Going against the Weddingbee crowd is going to be tough but there were enough responses on here that were on the side of wearing the dress that I don't think it will be the end of the world. As I said in my original post I had a guest (a good friend) wear a white-ish dress to my wedding and (1) I didn't even notice (someone else pointed it out after looking at photos) and (2) I promise she didnt steal any of my thunder (I was definitely the princess of my day!).
I do appreciate all the responses. I showed this to my husband (hehe it's still funny to say that) and he was so impressed with the number of people who responded - he said that we need Weddingbee for life to answer all the hard quetsions for us!
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