(Closed) Is this normal Cold feet?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Depends on what’s triggering this I think.  Is it crazy family drama? FI’s annoying habits?  Something he did?  The idea of being tied to one person forever?  Your life changing forever?  All of the above?  

Post # 4
Member
4328 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@alishaloo:  I bet that’s why your avatar is so unhappy. A tiny bit of “what if” cold feet is normal, but I think your degree of avoidance sounds like a problem. You should not feel like you are physically “dying” while planning a wedding. I would definitely reconsider.

 

Post # 5
Member
9057 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

That sounds a little intense… is there something specific that’s bothering you?  Really only you can answer this question.  For me, I was very afraid of my actual wedding/being judged/not good enough. 

I was driving in my car to work a week or so before, and my mind wandered to those people who end up getting in an accident right before their wedding, and have to cancel and get married in their hospital room… and that sounded pretty darn good.  But not because I didn’t want to marry my husband, just because then nobody would judge the wedding of a poor bride who got in an accident and made the best of it… it was a little crazy.

 

Post # 6
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

it sounds like pre-wedding jitters/stress to me. 2 of my friends are getting married the same day you are, and they’ve both come down the similar symptoms, physically ill, nervous, stressed. itll pass 🙂

Post # 7
Member
438 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree with PP, only YOU can decide is this is a bad sign. If you’re still excited for the day AFTER your wedding, and beginning your life together- I think you’re good. I get being stressed, and feeling unenthused by wedding stuff. But the reference to feeling like you’re dying is…worrysome. 

Post # 11
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@alishaloo:  It sounds like you’re more upset about the wedding than the impending marriage.  Why not elope?

Post # 12
Member
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I really think you need to reasses whats happening right now.  Is getting married really the right thing at this point in your life? 

Post # 13
Member
1462 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I know you probably beg to differ, but I think that you are SO YOUNG. You shouldn’t be feeling this way so close to your wedding at any age, but especially not while you are under 20. Why don’t you push everything back a year or two and wait?

Post # 14
Member
1681 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Ok, deep breaths. Instead of focusing on what you don’t like, think about what you DO. You get to marry the man you’ve been counting down the days until. It’s just a day like any other, that signifies your love and nothing more. If things aren’t perfect or people don’t “get it” then let it go. All that matters is that the one person who will make you feel better is promising to always be with you.

 

And as a side note, if you’re worried you won’t like it, don’t fret. Who says you can’t throw a killer vow renewal when money isn’t so tight?

Post # 15
Member
4328 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@alishaloo:  Well wait a minute, you think there’s an issue with the exchange student?

 

How old are you? Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to put the breaks on getting married right away.

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