Is this normal or is it just me?

posted 3 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
2111 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

@me9874:  So he wants to be in control when you’re on top? He can do that. FI certainly manages. Otherwise, if he likes you being there and the only problem is being unable to finish in that position, why not just start there and then switch it up when you’re ready to stop? Honestly, it’s my favorite position to start with, but I hate ending in it. If that ends up being the case, he always takes control once he starts to get close. Basically, I hold myself up and he thrusts upward. He can control the speed, depth, move my hips as needed, etc. I’m just on top. 

Post # 4
3202 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@HonoraryNerd:  +1 I’ve never experienced anything other than what you’re describing, with DH or otherwise.

Post # 6
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

FI can pretty much finish any which way you turn it. We’ve never really had a problem with that. Now me on the other hand…

Post # 7
3097 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - A court...

Dh & I haven’t been together nearly as long, but yeah the girl on top is mainly for me lol. He finishes as well but not usually maybe 60% of the time? Do you ask him what he’d like? Ex. Maybe go faster/ deeper etc or he just can’t since he’s not on top ? If I were in that situation I’d probably still go for tying him up, go on top , finish, then help him finish with a hand job or bj.. Then untie him. Tmi? Lol

Post # 8
4698 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@me9874:  I’ve only managed that feat a couple of times, I think it is semi-normal, DH seems to have an easier time in other ways as well. It doesn’t really bug me though since I don’t like that position much lol (I’m the one that would prefer to be tied…)

My only advice would be to really work him up like crazy, to where just about anything would do the job? (That’s how it happened for me the once or twice it did.)

Post # 10
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

My SO has a hard time finishing when I am on top also. I know exactly how you feel. Most of the time he is on top. Even when he is on top he will have difficulties finishing, me on the other hand… I finish too fast any which way! I am a lucky one. 

Post # 11
3433 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

It’s actually more about anatomy, when you’re on top, it’s not hitting as many of the most sensitive spots, so it’s harder to finish. 

Personally, I hate finishing there because I can never get the timing right.  I prefer if DH takes control (even if it’s from the bottom) but I just don’t like being on top, I assumed it was because DH is the only guy I ever did that with, so I just didn’t have enough practice (with 7+ years together), but I guess it’s more common than I realized.  


Post # 12
5905 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@me9874:  If you think about what he does when he’s on top and racing for the finish line, you realize just how much sensation and movement a man typically likes and needs to get there.  If I’m all done up there and we’re wearing out, I’ll grab the headboard, get off my knees and bring my feet up under his armpits, if I arch my back and ride Mr. 99 like Seattle Slew…he’s done for in about 45 seconds.

Post # 13
886 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

It depends. I know how to make him finish if I’m on top but it takes a lot of work on my half, I always end up so exhausted. My only suggestions *TMI* would be to work those hips, thrust and grind and dirty talk … never fails!  


Post # 14
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

FI can only finish with me on top when he controls the movement. So (on the rare occasion) when we use that position, I get on top and lean forward, basically laying on top of him, so that we controls the speed and depth. He finishes very quickly that way. He enjoys it when I’m on top and controls the movement, but he can’t seem to finish that way, probably because I can’t go as fast as he needs me to (not for very long anyway).

Post # 15
2365 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

 He’s not the only one! What worked for us is to get him REAAAAALLY close to climaxing, and then I hop on top. It took a while, but now he can climax with me on top the whole time. It’s a pretty brutal leg workout though! 

Post # 16
9859 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

@me9874:  FH rarely finishes this way – he hated it up until recently actually.  He has a new love for it and we found the ‘magic position’ that makes it happen.  (reverse cowgirl seems to be a winner – I’m not a fan but he loves it)

Leave a comment

Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors