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Is this offensive?

posted 5 months ago in Legal
  • poll: Is this offensive? Should they pay their bill?
    Yes it's offesnive : (290 votes)
    45 %
    No, it's just an accurate description like saying skinny girls : (28 votes)
    4 %
    Other (explained below) : (5 votes)
    1 %
    They have the right to refuse paying : (95 votes)
    15 %
    They DO NOT have the right to refuse paying : (221 votes)
    35 %
  •  
    1.
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    MrsWBS       

    Thought this would be an interesting topic to discuss...

    In this article, 3 women went to a restaurant and the waiter labeled their table as "fat girls" to keep track of them.  They were offended by it and felt they didn't have to pay their bill because of it.  

    What do you think?  Is this offensive?  Do they have a right to refuse paying their bill because of it?

    http://gma.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blogs/customers-called-fat-girls-restaurant-bill-165554715--abc-news-topstories.html

     
    2.
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    crayfish    September 11, 2010   Berkeley, CA

    Yes, it's offensive. But they still should have to pay.

     
    3.
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    msfahrenheit    August 28, 2011   Blacksburg VA

    Yes I would be offended and embarrassed in that situation. But seriously, that doesn't give them the right to not pay. They still ate the food so they need to pay for it.

     
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    Birdee106    October 6, 2012   KS

    Very offensive but that doesnt mean they get free food. Would be nice though.

     
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    discodance       

    I would be offended, but I would still pay.  I just wouldn't tip.

     
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    Mrs. Coyote    June 2012  

    Agree with PPs. Incredibly offensive, but that doesn't mean they get a free meal out of it. I would pay the bill and not leave a tip.

     
    7.
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    MrsWBS       

    Just wondering people's opinions who find it offensive - would it also be offensive if it was a table of thin women and the tab said skinny girls, what about a table of asian women that said asian girls? 

    Someone posted this to facebook and there's a big debate going on - it's very interesting.

     
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    MrsFairyBee    July 7, 2012   CO

    @discodance:  Exactly, they would get no tip from me. And I'd even tell them what I thought of the little discription and letting us see it. If you're going to classify like that at least don't let the customers know!

     
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    KateByDesign    October 29, 2011   Virginia

    That's why tips exist.  Pay your bill, but when it comes to how the wait staff treated you?  No tip.

     
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    Lyndzo    August 25, 2012   Milton, ON EDD Jan 12/2014

    It's offensive and I would have complained to the manager.

    Speaking from experience (in general) if a customer is unhappy the right things to do is apologize and offer to cover part of the bill.

    ETA: Just read the article and see that when they complained they were offered 25% then 50% off. I think the restaurant did the right thing.

     
    11.
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    Mrs. Coyote    June 2012  

    @MrsWBS:  Yes, all of that is offensive. I used to be a waitress and we had table numbers to keep track of our tables. We didn't label them based on the appearance of our customers. Gross.

     
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    KateByDesign    October 29, 2011   Virginia

    @MrsWBS:   Yes, both of these things would still be offensive. If they're labeled by the color they're wearing it's one thing, but they shouldn't be labeled by physical features they most likely can not control.

     
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    KH    October 22, 2011   Chicago

    @crayfish:  Agreed. The restaurant should have offered something to apologize (the bill comped, gift certificate for a return visit, etc). Unfortunately, we live in a time that "skinny" is considered a compliment and "fat" is an insult- it is not the same as "brunette" and "redhead".

     
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    mypinkshoes    April 28, 2012   mexico/ontario

    @KateByDesign:  i agree

     
    15.
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    hopefloats       

    Yup, super offensive. But I think the only thing they shouldn't have to pay is the tip.

     
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    cbee    July 26, 2010  

    Oh my gosh that is super insulting.  You still have to pay... I would just never go back!

     
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    FutureMrsShrewsbury    December 13, 2014   Maryland

    It would be very offensive! Do you think if that bartender had labeled the table "3 cripples", "3 ugly chicks", or "mom with retard kid" that manager wouldn't have been falling all over herself to make it right??? Making fun of anyone for anything is straight up bullying. He had to know those women would have seen that on their check. I think they are entitled to their meal being free.

     
    18.
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    Boston Bee      

    Yes it's offensive. Yes they should have to pay, but if I was the waitress, I would not be expecting a tip.

     
    19.
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    fishbone    September 2, 2011   washington, dc

    While I think they are responsible for the bill, I think it would be in the restaurant's best interest to comp their check in the name of good customer service.  So yeah, they owe the money for the food, but the employee royally screwed up by offending the customer, and the manager would be giving good customer service to comp the bill even though technically they don't have to.

    FWIW when I used to do restaurant work, we actually trained our bar staff on what they could and could not put on checks to identify customers. Customers seated at tables are easy because you just go by the table number, but when you've got a packed bar, it gets messy, especially if folks are standing or moving around and not sitting in chairs. We trained the barstaff to identify customers by clothing first and other generic details next, because no one would be offended to see "purple shirt" or "solo man @ window"  or "ladies @ beer taps" on their check.

    It just surprises me that service staff still make these idiotic mistakes.

     
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    Asia    September 2, 2013   Kansas

    The manager SHOULD HAVE given them the meal on the house. I have been comped for MUCH LESS than that. Horrible

     
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    lashphi    July 6, 2013   St. Pete Beach, FL

    I think it's evident that there's a problem with today's society when there's even a question if this is offensive or not.

     
    22.
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    lilone4403    July 30, 2011   Ontario

    That is horrible customer service and not only should they not pay for their meals but the gentleman who labeled that table should be fired immediately

     
    23.
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    Jellybones    September 1, 2014  

    Offensive and embarrassing on both parts. I feel bad for the waiter who lost his tip because the bartender put them under "Fat Girls" and I feel bad for the group. I don't think they should have completely refused to pay but the manager should have given them a nice discount.

     

    @MrsWBS:  I wouldn't say saying "Skinny Girls" is as offensive as saying "Fat Girls" because being called skinny and being called fat do not have the same connotations in our society.

     
    24.
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    MrsWBS       

    @FutureMrsShrewsbury:  I think your examples are obviously very offensive and insulting. 

    @KH:  

    But, fat may be an accurate description. Do you also think skinny girls on the tab would have been offensive? What about if we lived in a time when fat was "in" and skinny wasn't?

    Just playing devil's advocate here...

     

    Just as an aside, the tab was accidently given to them with that name on that I believe.  They weren't doing it to be mean knowing that the people would see it.

     
    25.
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    Jellybones    September 1, 2014  

    @fishbone:  When I was bartending, one of my coworkers got in trouble for keeping this guy's tab under the name "fuckface". Customer wasn't too pleased. The guy was a regular and a scumbag who regularly got warnings and escorted out so management couldn't blame her too much but she did get a slap on the wrist.

     
    26.
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    bella128    May 18, 2013   Canada

    I would bring it up with the manager who I would expect to take care of the bill and I might also bring it to a local newspaper and shame them for fat-shaming.

    I am offended by the "skinny girl" label just as strongly.  

     
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    FutureMrsShrewsbury    December 13, 2014   Maryland

    @lashphi:  +1

     
    28.
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    AB Bride    June 25, 2011   Canada

    Offensive, and a good restaurant manager wouldn't have made them pay.  They still have to pay the bill though, since the manager didn't offer then a free meal.

     
    29.
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    lashphi    July 6, 2013   St. Pete Beach, FL

    @MrsWBS:  I don't think the label "skinny girls" is in the same category as "fat girls". I think a label such as "anorexic girls" would probably be closer to the equivalent.

     
    30.
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    abbie017    March 16, 2013  

    Very offensive and rude, but doesn't justifying not paying for a meal they ate.  I would absolutely tell the manager, and not tip the server for the rudeness, but they still should pay.

     
    31.
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    FutureMrsShrewsbury    December 13, 2014   Maryland

    @lashphi:  +1

     
    32.
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    strawbs    May 15, 2012  

    offensive.

    still should pay.

    no tip.

     
    33.
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    MrsWBS       

    @lashphi:  I work in health care and have had people beg their doctors not to write overweight or obese in their medical records because they didn't want that label next to their name and found it offesnive.  Maybe there is a problem with society if people question if this is offesnive but maybe there's another problem when people are offended over reality and don't want to be held accountable for the truth.

    I grew up extremelyyyyy thin that I would get made fun of and called names for it.  People seem to discount those experiences because society says skinny is good, but it can be equally offensive to call someone skinny as it is to call them fat.  

     
    34.
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    WillyNilly    August 11, 2012   Seattle, WA

    I would have immediately notified the manager who would have comped the bill, absolving all need to tip. That is awful behavior.

     
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    HappilyEverAfter54    June 23, 2012   Central Pennsylvania

    I'd have walked out without paying... just saying. If this happened to me and I would have stayed there would have been a scene so they would probably just be happier if I left. lol

    That is so just so rude.

     
    36.
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    MariaW       

    I think the restaurant did the right thing by offering a discount on their meal, and they definitely still needed to pay. I mean, if the waiter had written "hot chicks" they probably would have been fine with it. Really, there are bigger problems in the world (says the girl who gets all torn up about being in the waiting stages of her relationship, perhaps somewhat hypocritically).

     
    37.
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    miss.wiggums    July 19, 2013   Pennsylvania

    I think that what the waiter did was offensive. I wouldn't have asked to not pay, I just wouldn't have tipped after speaking with a manager. It wasn't the restaurants fault. It was the waiter's fault. 

     
    38.
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    Tatum    October 2, 2010   Minneapolis

    When I worked at a bar, instead of labeling by table numbers, I would put in my own description. Mine were generally pretty benign, though, like "red shirt" or "Patriot Jersey". Even so, I always changed it back to the table number when I was printing it out. I am sure whoever entered it meant to change it and forgot, but that is the folly of using offensive names to keep track of your orders.

    I wouldn't flat out refuse to pay, but if this was an incident brought up to management, I would be shocked if they didn't comp the meal.

    Didn't this same thing happen last year with Papa Johns? Some guy who took the order wrote, 'Lady Chink Eyes' and the CEO himself apologized?

     
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    LiliKitty    February 15, 2014   Chicagoland, but wedding in Wisconsin

    @lashphi:  +1

    People usually don't go around insulting others by saying they're skinny, but they will with calling them fat. 9/10 times saying someone is skinny is a compliment. 10/10 times calling someone fat is an insult.

     
    40.
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    sn2bmrsmntgmry    September 29, 2012  

    It's offensive but they should still have to pay.

     

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