Post # 1
I’m filling out the contract for the officiant right now and one question has me stuck. The question asks if there’s anyone we would like to pay tribute to in the ceremony that couldn’t be at the wedding. The short answer is yes. I was very close to my maternal grandmother. I saw her everyday and was devastated when she died. She was the one person I wanted at my graduations and wedding (she died when I was 14, on my second day of high school). There are other grandparents that have passed away for both of us (I have my paternal grandmother and maternal grandfather that passed away, fiance’s maternal grandparents have both passed away) but we weren’t close to any of them or even alive when they died. I don’t want to seem like I’m leaving people out though, I just had a very strong special connection to my grandmother. The grandparents my fiance was always close to are still living. Would it be wrong to just include my grandmother or should I just leave it at the dedication on the program? (My mom is dedicating our recessional song to us in honor of my grandmother) It doesn’t feel wrong, but I don’t want anyone to be hurt.
Post # 3
Both of my parents are deceased, as are several of my husband’s aunts and uncles. However, my mom was the only one we mentioned in the ceremony. My dad died when I was only 4, and my husband wasn’t close to any of his aunts or uncles. Whereas I was so close to my mom that had we honored other people in the same section, it would have felt inappropriate to me. (I’m not wording that correctly, but hopefully you get what I mean.)
Post # 4
I get what you mean. That’s what me and him talked about. It’s not that they’re less important people but I mean, we never met them. I just feel like never having met someone is on a different level than going to my grandmother’s everyday.
Post # 5
Anyone else? My fiance said he doesn’t see an issue with it and my mom was excited about it but I just want to get any other viewpoints or insight that I may be overlooking
Post # 6
I think if your FI is fine with it – you should do it. Will you potentially offend someone? Probably. Most wedding decisions usually do. But, I think it’s a beautiful way for you to pay honor to your grandmother… who was more than just a grandmother to you.
Post # 7
We will definitely pay tribute to FI’s mom in some way, but I don’t think we’ll say anything about grandparents…7 of our 8 grandparents have passed away and the 8th probably won’t be able to make it. Not that they aren’t important, but I didn’t know 2 of my grandparents and FI didn’t really know some of his either…I don’t want to overly bring down the mood and for us, it works best to only mention FI’s mom.