Is this RSVP wording rude?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1340 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Yes, it’s rude. You could say instead “2 seats have been reserved in your name”. Just name the amount.

Post # 4
Member
1715 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I presonally don’t think it is rude because it really leaves no room for error. 

Post # 7
Member
1838 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

i don’t think the “(helps manage headcount)” is necessary

Post # 8
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think the whole part at the top in bold is rude. Just state how many seats are reserved, the names on the envelope, and “adult only reception” somewhere on the invite

Post # 10
Member
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

not a fan

Post # 11
Member
292 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I think the top part in bold is part of the template? explaining the language that’s to come below…

 

 

 

Anyway, we did this. We filled in how many guests were expected, and our guests were to fill in how many were actually coming. This DID cut down on people filling in “5!” when they were only supposed to bring 3. etc.

 

 

 

Not rude at all.

 

 

 

The way you address the envelopes should make it clear if children are invited or not. If they are, include them on the inner envelope. If not, the whole thing is addressed to parents only. Let word of mouth take care of explaining for sure that children are not invited. No need to spell it out explicitly on the invitation at all.

 

 

 

Post # 12
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I don’t find this rude at all. Invitations need to be word for word drawn out for some people or else you’ll have confused people or people thinking they can bring whoever they want.

Post # 13
Member
2744 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

That’s what I had on my RSVP cards. I don’t see a problem with it.

Post # 14
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I think that the writing in bold will not be on the invitation. If that’s the case, it is not rude at all.

Post # 15
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

If you invite John and Jane Smith on the invite and then send them this response card with 2 seats have been reserved for your party, you might still end up having John Smith take Sally Smith his daughter if his wife will be unable to make it.

It isn’t rude but some people will take it to mean that you’ve got 2 seats set aside for them, and they’ll think they’re able to fill those two with whoever if the specifically invited people aren’t able to make it. Just a word of caution.

Post # 16
Member
1327 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I would keep their names on the card and then instead put “____ of 2 will be attending”.  Saying that a number of seats have been reserved sometimes makes people think that they have 2 seats no matter what, so if one of them can’t make it they’re free to bring someone else. 

Honestly no matter how you word things some people aren’t going to get it, but I think this will help.

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