(Closed) is this rude/against etiquette or good to go? (wedding invitations)

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
3947 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think anything is against etiquette except for handing over the invitations.  No matter if you see them often or not, you should mail them the invitations.

Post # 4
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

Those things aren’t rude at all! I think you may be creating a little extra work for yourself by writing their names AND filling in the numbers, but if you want to do it go right ahead. 

Post # 5
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think filling the _ of 2 is fine.  I wouldn’t prefill the M___ line though and I would mail all invites regardless of if you see them or not.

Just be prepared for people to fill in 5 of 2 will come or cross out the stampe and fill in a different number.  It does happen!

Post # 6
Member
2106 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

___ of _2_ is fine, pre-filling the name line is NOT. What if you invite Bob and Mary. Bob can’t come, so Mary just writes her name. If you pre-fill them you won’t know who is coming which will be hell for your seating charts and escort cards. 

Do not hand out invites. Half of your guests will lose them between the car and the house. Always provide postage for RSVPs.

Post # 7
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I was going to hand out local invites to save money but I guess it would be tacky. I like the idea of stamped numbers. 

Post # 8
Member
745 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

My fiance’s co-workers were all handed their invites, but I still prestamped the RSVPs.

As far as the name line goes, I’ve never seen a problem where people don’t realise they need to put their name there. Many ignore the M, which is fine. For example, I’ve gotten M__Dave and Sally Soandso___ but everyone has known to put their names down.

Post # 9
Member
2287 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: Central Park

Most people do “We have reserved __ seat(s) in your honor” and then write in the number. Also it is never rude to hand deliver an invitation. But you should include a stamp for every RSVP card. 

Post # 10
Member
4513 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think you’re good to go. I don’t think you need to pre-fill the M________ line, but you know your guests better than I do!

Personally I’d just mail the invitations, but if you do hand them out, definitely pre-stamp the RSVPs. 

Post # 11
Member
1928 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I had        of   2    on my RSVP cards and I had zero complaints or problems with it. My Dad’s best friend wrote in “12” instead of one and he also put that he will be bringing “A bunch of beauties” on his response card. Luckily I knew he was kidding. Other than that I had zero problems.

 

Post # 12
Member
10454 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I’ll be doing that and for the same reasons. Totally fine to do! The guests trying to invite extra people are the rude ones!

Post # 13
Member
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I have no idea the etiquitte as far as the number of guests allowed goes, but I can tell you what we did for the M______ part. I didn’t like that either, I thought it would be confusing and looked weird. So instead I put just a blank _________________, and then underneath the blank put (Who’s Coming?). Admittedly, our RSVPs and invitations were a lot more informal, but if yours are more formal, I’m sure there’d be a formal way to do that. To me it seems less confusing, and then also saves you the work of pre-writing all the names!

Post # 14
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

I originally had _ of # will be attending on our invites, but FI didn’t understand what that meant!  For that reason I changed it to “we have reserved # seats in your honor”.  Looks like others said they have had no problem, but just my two cents~

Post # 15
Member
3589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@loverlylane: I don’t think it’s tacky to hand over invitations, not at all. Remember that ins the good old day sof polite society, one’s driver might have delivered one’s handwritten invitations.

But I DO understand that the recdeipients will lose them if they are handed out at a social gathering, and for that reason, it’s smarter to mail them.

Post # 16
Member
355 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I disagree that it’s not okay to hand out invites. All the weddings I’ve been invited to from work friends have been hand delivered and I did not feel offended, nor did I lose them. I just left two save the dates on desks this morning 🙂 After hand addressing over 100 envelopes last night, I was too eager to skip any writing that I could get away with!

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