Post # 1
I am getting a teeny, tiny bit annoyed with Darling Husband. I drink about 2/3 of a cup of coffee in the morning and that’s all of my caffeine intake. The other evening he had a Tab soda, and it just smelled good. I asked for a drink, and he was like, “You can have just one small sip” and gave me this face ಠ_ಠ.
I explained that it’s generally agreed that up to 200mg per day is okay, and a cup of coffee has about 100mg or less, and a whole can of soda is about 40mg, so I could drink the whole thing if I wanted. He still gave me the stink eye.
Then, I mentioned that later in the pregnancy, I might drink a small glass of wine or maybe a few sips of beer with dinner now and then. I thought he was going to faint. He looked so terrorized by the idea. I tried explaining that it’s generally thought to be fine to have a very limited amount of alcohol with food, and that I certainly wouldn’t be doing that often, or with hard liquor, or early in the pregnancy. He was like, “well, let’s just see what your doctor has to say about that.”
I feel like I live with the pregnancy police. He doesn’t even really know all of the other ZOMG-don’t-eat-this rules, and I don’t plan to tell him, or I will never be left in peace. On the one hand, it’s kind of cute, because he’s being protective of the baby. On the other hand, I want him to chill the F out a little. I feel like he’s judging me.
Post # 3
Yep – can totally relate and while it is very sweet- sometimes it would be nice to be able to eat and drink anything and give him the stink eye 🙂
Post # 4
@IAmTheShadow: yes. he is constantly asking “is that cheese pasteurized?” or “I wouldn’t order that from this restaurant, i wouldn’t trust it, etc.” I know it comes from a good place so I think it’s okay. And actually sort of sweet.
Post # 5
Has he gone to the doctor’s appoinments with you? That would give him a chance to ask his questions there, so he’s not just relying on whatever intuition or “facts” he thinks he has! You could also have him read a book on pregnancy or something, but those books tend to be really overly cautionary in my very humble opinion.
My husband is really relaxed about what I eat and drink, which is nice…I’m definitely the more coneservative of the two of us. At times I wish he would step in and tell me not to shovel snow, or something, but overall I appreciate his outlook.
I do think it’s sweet that your husband cares so much! But maybe some additional information will help him relax a little…and trust you to know what’s best for the baby.
Post # 6
Ha! My husband was always like: “why don’t you want to come out for a 100km mountain bike ride in the wild?” and I’d have to remind him that I had no energy, morning sickness and oh yeah, A BABY IN MY BELLY which made cycling pretty uncomfortable!
Post # 7
My Darling Husband didn’t like it much when I had a beer at 4 months pg in the middle of a July heat wave while we were at the cottage. I just ignored him and he went back to trusting me to make my own choices.
But after I fell down a set of stairs (no it wasnt after the beer! lol), he became more protective in general but not over what I consumed.
Post # 8
My SO’s totally going to be one of those. I hate when people boss me around about what I eat and drink though, because of bad childhood memories, so I’m going to have to remember to chill out when that happens, and that he only means well!
Post # 9
@IAmTheShadow: My Darling Husband is total food police. Although I’m beginning to catch on that he just doesn’t want me to eat food he finds delicious because he wants it all to himself…
Post # 10
@IAmTheShadow: hahaha! Darling Husband is going to be like that! Its cute thinking about it, but I can see where it would get annoying!
Post # 11
@kate02121: I will definitely have him come in to my appointments with me! But we don’t have our first one until 8 weeks, so it’s awhile yet before that. I like the idea of having him read more information, but I think he’s skeptical of some of the things I’ve read, so I’ll have to make sure it’s all scientificallly supported and from a reliable source (which totally makes sense). I think you’re right, I think some of it comes from just not knowing what the current thinking is on pregnancy, and going off of “well, better safe than sorry, just cut it all out.” I will be looking for some resources to give him which are reliable but not overly cautious!
Post # 12
I’m getting a lot of this from my husband too. “No, you can’t have coke!! or coffee…or tea…or chocolate…or junk food…or a freakin HOT DOG!!” He was eating a hot dog the other night and it smelled SO good and suddenly there was nothing I wanted more than a hot dog. I looked it up online and read to him as long as it’s cooked generally you don’t have anything to worry about. So frustrating to have to justify everything! I don’t even usually like Coke, but I’ve seriously been craving it since I’ve been pregnant. Not all the time, but maybe once a week.
Oh…if only he knew what I was doing while I was at work under non-judgemental eyes!!
On the other hand it’s kind of endearing that he wants to protect our little baby 🙂 So I can’t be getting too upset with him!
Post # 13
@the_newlymintedmrs-s17: ahahaha, maybe that’s part of it – he just didn’t want to share his soda with me! So selfish! 🙂
@ChicFoodist: Yes, exactly! I don’t like people being critical of my food choices. It makes me feel ashamed, then kind of stabby once I get over the ashamed thing.
@MaggieF: A beer during the summer sounds so good. I’m glad the stairs incident was not connected, though! And that you & baby were okay!
Post # 14
@Songbird29: haha, yes, I definitely have an internal struggle of “Awww, he’s concerned about the baby!” and “Aarrgh, just give me the damn soda already.”
Post # 15
@IAmTheShadow: Ah…if you haven’t been to an appointment yet I would cut him a little slack (even though I can see how annoying that is). He is probably very uneducated right now, or maybe too educated.
I am 29 weeks, and Darling Husband is protective about a few things such as lifting anything, even if it is light. He also puts my ice cleats on my shoes every morning because he’s so scared I’m going to slip. He also eyeballs me when it comes to soda as well, always asking if it is caffeine free. As far as food goes though? He leaves me the heck alone. I’m glad he’s attentive and looking out for my best interests. In your case though, had my Darling Husband been doing that since before week 8, I probably would have gone crazy!!
Post # 16
Darling Husband is very protective but I know it’s because he cares about me and baby so I think it’s kind of cute. I’ve only been annoyed a couple of different times, but once I usually explain things to him , he’s fine… (like caffeine for example). When we walk outside on ice he’s way more of a gentleman now than he was before haha. Always making sure he has me by the arm. I’ve never been a super healthy eater… I’m a carbs eater and not much for fruits and veggies. I’ve definitely been trying more and definitely taking my vitamin to make up for it, but he’s not always 100% happy with that.
Overall though, I have no complaints. I like that he cares and he doesn’t go overboard.