(Closed) Is your SO/Fiance/Husband…

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: In a world where there are no physical relationships, would your SO still be your best friend?
    Definitely! We're get along awesomely and have everything in common and always have fun together : (187 votes)
    60 %
    Most likely! We have a great relationship, but there could be someone else more suited as a friend! : (48 votes)
    15 %
    Probably?! We'd be good friends at least... We'd sometimes fight, but best friends do that too! : (24 votes)
    8 %
    Maybe. We get along well, but without the physical aspect, there might not be quite enough!...? : (12 votes)
    4 %
    Probably not. We get along, but the attraction/physical part and attraction is pretty important! : (4 votes)
    1 %
    Highly doubtful. What's a relationship without sexual attraction?? I have other friends for that! : (3 votes)
    1 %
    Definitely not! I have other best friends already! Physical/sexual attraction is necessary! : (4 votes)
    1 %
    I'm not sure... hmm... It's pretty difficult to distinguish the two from each other, so I can't tell : (3 votes)
    1 %
    I have more than one "best" friend. They're just... different. So this doesn't apply to me really : (16 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    846 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    without a doubt! my FI and i are basically the same person, just different genders. we literally have everything in common and i have more fun with him than i’ve ever had with anybody else, and i know that would still hold true even if the physcial aspect wasn’t involved.

    Post # 4
    Member
    8042 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @yanamari:  Well I’m used to having female “best friends”. My SO and I were friends before we got together… he was with someone else so nothing happened between us until that was over. I think we definitely get along as friends but then again I like some female friendship every now and then as well. Difficult question!

    I don’t actually see my real life best friend very often while I see my SO every single day. I don’t really have any close male friends anymore since they all wind up hitting on me and it makes me uncomfortable.

    I suppose he could be my best friend if there was no such thing as sexual attraction lol. It’s all semantics really but for all intents and purposes since he is the most important person in my life, he probably is the best friend that I have even though I consider my BFF to be a girl I’ve known 10+ years.

    Post # 5
    Member
    4441 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

    @yanamari:  I think FI and I would be friends, but my good friend would probably be my BEST friend.

    Post # 6
    Member
    532 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

     

    Absolutely. 

    My FH and I were friends for five years before we started dating. I was his girlfriend that he shocked with all his sexual escapade stories. So yes – I even know his real history, and still agree to marry him.

    In addition – I helped him plan a proposal to a different woman… picking out the ring and staging it. I wasn’t ever jealous of her, it was years before we started dating. 

    Yup- the world has crazy ways. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1120 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2010

    Definitely. We were friends first and the physical attraction grew as I discovered how awesome he was. We have so much in common, yet so many things to learn from each other and there’s a complicity that I never had with anyone. We we often thinking the same thing at the same moment even before we knew each other.

    We have a lot of fun together and there’s no doubt in my mind that he’d still be my best friend without sex. Heck he’d still be my husband too, even if he told me we’d be a platonic monogamous married couple (which would never happen since we both enjoy sex so much)

    Post # 8
    Member
    3689 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    He was my best friend before we were a couple!

    Post # 9
    Member
    1333 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    If the standards are such that you, OP, stated, then I do not think my SO and I would be friends…at all.  Which, makes me laugh, now that I think about it from that viewpoint!  Our ‘ideas’ of a good time with friends are just different:

    He is a ‘country loving, beer guzzling, sitting in friends garages…playing with cars/trucks/tractors, etc MAN’, and I am a ‘wine drinking, game night, appetizer loving gal whom enjoys gossip, small plates of food, and a warm fireplace!’

    So no, if there was not attraction/lust/complete love for this man, then a) our paths would never cross, and b) I would not be so ‘open’ to the things he loves.  WHICH, is one the favorite parts of our relationship.  He has opened me to something new, and I him.  I will sit in the garage with him, and his toys, and he will hit up a wine bar with me after we see a movie, or shop a bit.

    It makes us us, and he is without a doubt my best friend TODAY, but definitely because we spend so much time together, share everything, and know each other’s personalities and quirks 🙂

     

    Post # 10
    Member
    821 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    yes, best friends for sure. we met and we clicked. we were best friends first. it was not a very physical relationship, and in many ways still isn’t. we hold hands a lot though! I’d be sad if it was a world without hand holding. D;

    Post # 11
    Member
    4275 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I really have no idea. We get a long great sure, but the physical attraction is a big part of our relationship as well. Plus, we were not friends before we started dating so….

    Post # 12
    Member
    9483 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    He is my best friend.  We get along so great and have tons of fun with each other.

    Post # 13
    Member
    4049 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I have my female best friend who is in a completely different category, as she is more like my sister and someone I can have constant “girl talk” with. My SO and I, however, started out as friends. We became so attached after a few months of talking, and it was only then that we woke up and realized, “Huh, there might be something else there too.” And we went forward with a romantic relationship.

    So based on our history of being close friends first, I can confidently say we’d be just as close even without a romantic involvement.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1719 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    DH isn’t my BFF.  I’d probably give up on our friendship after a few months.  lol  He is a grumpy man who hates talking on the phone.  And, I’m his opposite.  //  My two BFFs (one girl; one guy) are more like me.  We talk/text all the time.  The three of us have been friends since the 7th grade which makes that 14 years now!  It is nice to have a friendship outside of my relationship with DH.

    Post # 15
    Member
    9631 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Yes, he’s my best friend in the world and a very fun person to be with.  Every moment we can spend together is pure joy.  We have almost everything in common so it’s fun being together, regardless of what it is we’re doing.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2966 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Definitely. He’s my best friend and entirely different from my other best friend, who is a girl, who is like a sister. 

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