Post # 1
I carpool to work with a couple people since my commute is about 45 minutes. It has really helped. I spend about $100 less on gas every month and it helps with not racking up the miles on my car.
Most of the time, I enjoy the car rides. But more and more so lately, one of the women I ride with has been taking little digs at me often. She’ll make catty comments about my hair, outfits, makeup, boyfriend, etc.
“Oh, you look like you just got out of bed. Good morning!”
“Wow, you’re actually dressed for the workplace today!”
“You picked THAT nail color?” Etc etc etc.
Today, she made a comment about my skin breaking out. She rarely has anything positive to say regarding my looks. These are things I would never say to someone else.
I’ve been biting my tongue and ignoring because I really don’t want to jeopardize this carpooling situation and most of the time, we have good conversations and she’s fine.
But I may something if it continues. What would you do?
Post # 3
@definitelymaybe: my mouth gets me into some BIG trouble sometimes, I would give it right back I actually enjoy opportunities like these. I don’t seek them out but when provoked I let em have it! Feels good to squash a bully. I suggest you try it next time:)
Post # 5
Post # 8
@definitelymaybe: I would say, “wow! Did you really just say that?” and then wait for her to realize how rude she is being. Say it with the same tone she does.
additionals: “you say the oddest things” “I know your mama raised you better than that” etc
Post # 10
@Birdi: I think I might love you.
OP, Google is the best. I present to you some highlights from the interwebs for responses:
“Do you always mask insults with humor?”
“Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn’t have given you worse advice…”
“If I wanted a bitch, I would have gotten a dog.”
“I’ve been called worse by better.”
And finally some literature:
“I desire that we be better strangers.” – As You Like It, William Shakespeare
Post # 11
@LittleCricket: Love you too;)
Here’s a good one…if assholes could fly this place would be an airport.
Post # 12
Yikes, I would be so upset! Is she picking on just you or is she this mean to everyone? I’d be so tempted to say sometihng to her. I worked with a girl who said stuff like that to me all the time. The worst was when she said something about how it looked like I lost a little weight, but then added that i was “really fat” before (anddd… it was right in front of another co-worker who is recovering from an eating disorder). I said something like, “Wow, that felt like a backhanded compliment to me! I must be really sensitive today b/c there’s NO way you would act that way”. She quickly walked away
Post # 13
@LittleCricket: love your responses!!!
Post # 14
@LittleCricket: LOL I adore the idea of using Shakespeare as your witty retort: “why don’t you just shuffle off this mortal coil?!”
@definitelymaybe: OP, I definitely think you should call her out. She thinks she’s getting away with her little barbs and zingers, and would be blindsided if you make her account for her words. It doesn’t have to be caustic or even especially witty, but it should at least be straightforward and civil (because that paints her in an even more foolish light).
Update us on how things go!
Post # 15
wow thats very ignorant of her and i wanna hit her for you.
im very intolerant to ignorant people.i know me,i would have said something to her such as” like are you really trying to put me down right now,are you trying to hurt my feelings for whatever reasons because if you are its not working and its starting to really piss me off,keep your rude comments and feelings to yourself or im a fraid my fist might want to meet your mouth.
ugggg,and i hate that is how im am,i try to controll myself,but i cant after at least 2 times of someone being ignorant to me.
you are a very sweet person it seems by your post and i sure hope there is something you could say to her that will get her to see its not cool at all to say something like that to you or anyone♥
and we sure dont want you to loose your car pooling deal 🙂
Post # 16
@definitelymaybe: I’m pretty blunt. The next time she says something, I’d just say “Is there a reason why you’re always attacking my appearance? It’s hurtful to me.” Just see what she says. But I wouldn’t just let it slide.