- 7 years ago
My Fiance and I are having some major problems with my future father in law.
Some background: He has a very um “difficult” personality to begin with. Him and my Fiance have a complicated past too, my Fiance was literally abandoned by both of his parents. His dad was having affairs through out the country traveling with work, his mom eventually got re-married, moved into a house with her new husband and his kids and took care of them leaving my Fiance and his two older brothers to fend for themselves. He always wants and needs everything done HIS way and on his terms etc. You get the idea.
MY Fiance and I have been engaged for 3 years and booked our wedding venue last July. We’ve told everyone via word of mouth when our wedding is and my bridal shower and have a wedding website set up to keep people up to date. My Future Father in Law had a gathering last labor day at his house with some out of town guests from my FI’s side and we told them all about the wedding, they even drove to our venue and checked it out which was very nice. My Fiance and I have gone over there and told my Father-In-Law when the date is going to be and where etc. several times since then. Despite this, Father-In-Law says he had no idea when and where our wedding was, thought it was very rude that no one has gotten their wedding invitations yet for our 7/2 wedding and doesn’t understand why our wedding is on 4th of July weekend because it interferes with certain peoples vacation time. He’s even come into my FI’s work yelled at him about it and calls him at work yelling about his feelings. In response to this I sent my Father-In-Law and his family a nice email saying when the dates were for all the wedding stuff, and explained I’m getting my masters and go to school every Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, work 2 jobs, and am doing 50 observation hours while trying to plan the wedding. My only free time off school all summer is 4th of July week, thus our wedding date. MY Father-In-Law send an email saying “Thanks, looking forward to your wedding hoopla” theeen he sent me another email yesterday asking me to hold off on sending out his guests invitations until he has a better understanding of their schedules.
My Fiance is very annoyed and hurt, wants his dad off the wedding invitation wording since he is contributing nothing but frustration to the wedding, doesn’t want his brother to stand with him in the wedding because he agrees with their dad that it’s rude no guests have gotten invites yet. I’m telling him to hold off on thinking hastily and not to do or say anything he’ll regret.
I guess I’m looking for some advice as to what to say to him. I’ve been very polite, killing him with kindness. I’m just getting tired of FI’s family thinking our wedding is a low priority and having to alter things around them. It is our wedding after all. Isn’t the part of the point of sending invites out to inform people when our date is? I understand not everyone will be able to make our date because it is on a holiday weekend and people are busy, but geez. *sighs* Should I just tell him yes? I just don’t want to be blamed for slacking on the wedding invites by holding off on sending them.
Thanks for listening Bees!