"It makes me sound old" alternates names for MOH

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
8426 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think the only other thing you could call her is Maid of Honor, or maybe Lady/Woman of Honor (since guys get called ‘Man of Honor’).  I never really understood this reasoning though; wouldn’t it be better to be recognized as a Matron of Honor and not look old rather than look old and be a Maid of Honor (i.e. “spinster” status)?  Maybe it’s just cultural (I’m asian).  I’m the matron of honor for my friend’s wedding and I love being called the matron of honor (I also love being Mrs. Marriedname) because I love being married.  Getting older is just part of life, some do it gracefully (Meryl Streep) and others fight it tooth and nail (Madonna).

Post # 4
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would just call them both “Maid of Honour” as it is the exact same position you are giving out. Just because she is married it doesn’t mean you must refer to her as a Matron instead of Maid. To me the Maid of Honour sounds younger that the Matron of Honour, the Matron just sounds spinster to me instead of the other way around. 

If you really don’t want to refer to both as a maid of honour you could always just switch to Bridesmaid for both or more greative with “Best Woman” “Woman of Honour” “Honour Attendant”… I just got these from an older thread on here http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/alternate-term-for-maid-of-honor/#axzz2vkyrd1lg

Post # 6
Member
11002 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

An alternative would be to refer to both of these ladies as “Honor Attendants.”

Post # 5
Member
8426 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

Matron just sounds spinster to me instead of the other way around. 

WeddingBells2014:  I thought that “matron” showed the woman was married, while “spinster” is usually a woman that’s older and never been married?

Post # 7
Member
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I like Lady of Honor – shows respect and doesn’t age you nor give off a spinster vibe.

Post # 8
Member
9533 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think “old” has gotten a bad rap. Why is it so bad to be old? Really? And Matron doesn’t refer to age. It refers to marital status. So why is it bad to be married? I just don’t get it. But I seem to be in the minority. I’d call her a Matron of Honor and she’ll get over it. But you can use Honor Attendent for both if you want. 

Post # 9
Member
2174 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

housebee:  This.  Also, not a big deal.  Anyone who can see her will know she isn’t old.

Post # 12
Member
918 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

It’s just a silly title that nobody will pay any attention to.

Post # 10
Member
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

linsical:  

You could always go with “Honour Attendant”

Post # 11
Member
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

 

linsical:  I would just call her whatever she wants to be called. I wouldn’t force “Matron” on her just because it is technically correct. And I know a lot of people who associate “matronly” with being older/wiser/motherly/grandmotherly whether it’s correct or not.

I’d go ahead and call her Maid of Honor…anyone who will make a big deal to you about the fact that she’s married and you called her “Maid” just has too much time on their hands.

Post # 14
Member
2871 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

linsical:  My younger sister was my matron of honor. We laughed about it but didn’t worry too much about it. 

Post # 13
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

You could call her the Best Woman.

Post # 15
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - The Runnymede Hotel

Spinster is actually just the same as Bachelor – a single person, but it now has sexist connotations (like ‘Master’ and ‘Mistress’). 

In the UK we don’t have a Maid of Honour, we’d call her ‘Chief Bridesmaid’. I’m calling mine ‘Best Woman’, because that is who she is to me!

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