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My Wedding....It is Done!

It's a ring thing..

posted 1 year ago in Etiquette
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    1.
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    Blushing bee
    cliffette    November 10, 2010  

    Are any of you planning on wearing your engagement ring into your ceremony? I heard that most brides give their engagement ring to someone else to hold on to, and walk into the ceremony bare-fingered... it's only during the signing or after the ceremony that they put the engagement ring back on.

    My wedding ring fits above the engagement ring, so it seems just natural to go in wearing the engagement ring, but I'm wondering if there's some sort of symbolism or etiquette to do with bare fingers that I'm missing.

    Also, I have a golden ring (the rest of my jewellery is white gold) that my grandmother gave to me. I wear it on the middle finger of my right hand.. would it be okay to wear that into the ceremony as well?

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    I think it is okay to do whatever you want! I have not decided yet... but I kind of like the idea of wearing my ring in on its correct finger. I know that the wedding ring goes on the inside (closest to your heart)... but to me I like the idea of slipping it on over my e-ring during the ceremony. 

    Kind of like... he put the first one on my finger as a promise to marry, and then he'll put the band on to "seal the deal" or something. :)

     
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    Traditionally, the wedding ring is supposed to be closer to the palm of your hand than the engagement ring ("closer to the heart").  So, some brides don't want to be wearing the engagement ring when the wedding ring is put on.

    However, this reasoning clearly would not apply to your grandmother's ring.  And even with regard to the wedding ring, brides do different things.  Some give it to someone else to hold during the ceremony.  Some wear it on their right hend during the ceremony, then move it back afterward.  Some just have the wedding ring put on over the engagement ring, and then switch them around later.  For Jewish brides, the wedding ring is initially put on the index finger of the right hand, so it's not an issue.

    We didn't need to worry about this, since we didn't have engagement rings at all.  But you can figure out what works for you.

     
    4.
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    Blushing bee
    cliffette    November 10, 2010  

    Oh, the "closer to your heart" explanation sounds really lovely.. Unfortunately we opted for an e-ring that, while beautiful and delightful to me, doesn't really allow for the wedding band to go underneath.

    Because of the way my rings fit together, if I went in bare-fingered, I'd have to remove my wedding band very soon after the ceremony to put my e-ring back on, and ideally I'd like to keep my wedding band on for as long as possible. It's not a huge deal, but just nicer to think that once it goes on, it's not going to come off for a very long time. :)

    I like CorgiTales' thinking though--that he's just 'sealing the deal'! lol!

     
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    @cliffette:  If your wedding ring is meant to go over the engagement ring, then you don't have a problem.  You can wear it into the ceremony, and just have him put the wedding ring over it.

     
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    Blushing bee
    ldyparadox99    September 10, 2010   Netherlands

    I've been wearing my e-ring on my right hand and my wedding ring will go on my left.

    Since living over in the Netherlands, I've looked up the engagement ring/wedding ring traditions.  Protestants wear the e-ring on the left hand and the wedding ring on the right.  Catholics do the exact opposite.  Also, something that I didn't know until a few months ago and FI got berated for not telling me...he should have gotten an e-ring as well!! LOL

    Other countries do one way or the other and it usually depends on the bride's religion.  Wearing both rings on one finger is a very American thing (slowly being taken up over here, but simple wedding bands are holding out).

     
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    Sugar bee
    slicey19      

    @ldyparadox99: haha it's the same in Germany with the seperate hands but it is engagement on left, married on right. FI also had an engagement band, actually even before we were engaged they were partner rings or something - v. common here but he lost his on vacation this year so now he has to wit until next month for a wedding band. It's been really good practice for him though since he never wore any sort of acessories before. Hopefully, he won't lose the platinum wedding band which is much harder to replace than his sterling silver ring.

     
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    Blushing bee
    cliffette    November 10, 2010  

    It's amazing hearing all these different traditions. In Australia, I think we are adopting the American style of wearing both on the ring finger at once, and generally e-rings and wedding bands will go on the left hand, whether you wear one or both at the same time.

    I was a fan of wearing just a beautiful plain band on my ring finger, and moving the e-ring to the right hand, but managed to choose an e-ring style that will only look good on my left hand AND must be worn beneath the wedding band *facepalm*. Ahh, the joy of choosing impulsively! I still love my e-ring to bits though.

    @slicey, I hope he doesn't lose his wedding band either!

    @2dBride, I'm going to do exactly that, now that I know there are so many different ways to wear the rings going into, and going out of the ceremony!

     
    9.
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    Blushing bee
    karab819    November 20, 2010   Tewksbury, MA

    I actually think it's the other way around.

    The wedding ring goes on first "closer to your heart" and your engagement ring goes on the outside. That is why the engagement ring is taken off (aside from any other personal reasons) of your finger and switched to your right hand or another finger so you can slide it back on the correct finger after the wedding ring is placed on your finger first.

    Might be worth researching but that's what I was always told - and I was told by my jeweler.

     
    10.
    163 posts
    Blushing bee
    karab819    November 20, 2010   Tewksbury, MA

    OK sorry I just did some research on wikipedia because I was curious now... and here is a paragraph from what I found:

    One interpretation states that the woman wears the wedding ring below the engagement ring, thus making it closer to the heart. Another practice holds that the woman should wear the wedding ring above the engagement ring, thus sealing the atmosphere of the engagement into the marriage. Still others prefer that the wedding ring should be worn alone. Further, modern ring sets in the United States are often marketed as a three-piece set, including the man's wedding band, the woman's engagement ring, and a slender band that is mounted to the engagement ring before the wedding, converting it into a single, permanent wedding ring.

     

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wedding_ring

     

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