It's so annoying when…

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3268 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@juliana192:  EEEW what a creeper! Seriously, what a jerk that guy is to behave that way. I guess it might be a good thing you found out he’s not such a nice guy after all, so you can look out for any antics he might get up to while you have to work with him.

Obviously you did as you needed to and shut it down, but it’s still icky. I sympathize with you for being grossed out and surprised! I hope that guy will have the shame to act appropriately around you when you have to work together again.

I’ve had something a bit like that happen to me, but not quite so overtly and it might have been an honest, clueless mistake (though I do emphasize that MIGHT is the operative word here). A guy I go to grad school with, who started out as one of my friends, and who was well aware that I am in a committed relationship, asked me to watch movies with him at his house, just the two of us. Granted, the movies he suggested were documentaries about the sorts of things we are in school for, but still– not OK!! 

Post # 4
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee

@juliana192:  aww what a creep. You seem like a sweet girl but you know what? Its not your fault if he mistakes your friendly manor for flirting!

I would say a casual hello to him around the office and keep talk to strictly business. Perhaps even a *little* cold so he gets the message. If any behavior like that continues or escalates I would bring it up to HR

Post # 5
Member
2116 posts
Buzzing bee

@Creiddylad:  ok THANK YOU! so you agree it is not appropriate for a guy and a girl to hang out and watch movies alone at night when at least one of them has a SO???

because I had a pretty weird predicament a few weeks back. My cousin/best friend’s husband moved back to the area (she is soon to follow) and we work together. We never really talked before but we are pretty cool now and have had lunch a few times, as well as me hanging with both of them when she was visiting.

HOWEVER!!! he asked me a few weeks ago (since we were talking about a certain brand of alcohol) if i wanted to come over and watch disney movies and try the drink. ummmm what? just us? no thanks. I know my BF wouldnt care as he knows i have NO INTEREST whatsoever, but still thats weird right? He said she was perfectly OK with it and looking at their relationship im sure she didnt have a problem but … I didnt think it was appropriate.

Post # 6
Member
230 posts
Helper bee

@juliana192:  That is annoying! Especially since you didn’t see it coming. And how disrespectful to be arrogant to your boyfriend.

I was in not a similar situation but a creepy situation with a guy. We tried dating quite a few years ago but after one movie and a lot of drama caused by him I realized it wasn’t worth it. We later became friends again while I was flirting with my soon to be boyfriend (now ex). So he laid the flirting on thick but I became taken by the ex. He became pissed off, drama ensued, months later he asked if we could be friends again. Ex moved away but we were LD for quite a few months. Creeper started hanging around and showed up at my usual haunts (that he never used to go to). My friends would start bumping into him there and he’d ask them where I was and would start searching for me. One time I was sitting behind a large plant and my friend texted me to stay there because it was the one place Creeper couldn’t see me and she knew he was running around looking for me. He dedicated a karaoke song to me after I ignored him all night. He started sending me messages saying he knew I was cheating on my ex (I was not!) and I should be dating him instead and we could move in together and he’d take care of me and we have a connection (WTF?). I told him repeatedly I wasn’t interested and if he carried it on further I’d have no choice but to cut all contact.

So I stopped going to my ‘haunt’ for awhile, my ex and I broke up, it had been a few months and I thought that was the end of it. My now SO moved back to town (we were friends before but he went out of town for university) and we decided to go on a date. We went to the movies, decided to go to the haunt for a couple of drinks and socialize with people. We sat down at a table and Creeper walked over to a chair that was right near where I was and STARED at me!! Like didn’t try to join in with anyone at the table, didn’t say hi, just moved a chair a few feet away and turned it towards me and stared. It was directly behind me and my friends pointed him out, a couple of acquaintances went ‘Who’s the weirdo sitting behind you!?’. Someone I barely knew yelled out he was ‘F***ing creepy’. He didn’t get the hint.

He used to seem normal and fun. Now I keep my distance. And he keeps his distance more now that my SO did the chest-puff thing to him.

At one time he was just really annoying. I hope unlike me you don’t get yours as a stalker! They suck!

Post # 7
Member
3268 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@leisha606:  Yes, I agree! I do not think watching movies one-on-one w/ someone of the opposite sex (or of same sex if both are gay) when at least one person is in a relationship, is appropriate, at all! Especially if alcohol is involved. Either that guy is also clueless, or he was planning to not behave properly. Blargh! Glad you got out of that one!

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