(Closed) It has started… Someone invited herself to my wedding.

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
12816 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

People are rude.  She’s fishing for an invitation, but only you can invite her.  So, don’t, if you don’t want her there.  But keeping all wedding plans from her is a smart decision!

Post # 4
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Sometimes…. I just wonder what people are thinking when they do things like this…..

Post # 5
Member
3668 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Wow, how presumptuous of her! If she wants to have a reunion with her friends, she can arrange one. Sheesh.

Post # 6
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I hate that! I’m so sorry you had to deal with that.

Must totally have a right of passage- I have a “cousin” (she is my dad’s brother’s ex-wife’s daughter with her new husband) I met her once… She posted on my fb, months after I got engaged, on a post about the sandy hurricane (my fam is in nyc), “congratulations on your engagement, i am expecting an invite, thank you” WTF! I ignored it, laughed, and then ignored it…

I seriously want to delete my fb when shit like that happens.

Post # 7
Member
64 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I’ve had this happen too. I’m having a small budget wedding and I really can’t afford to have people I haven’t talked to in years there. I would never take it upong myself to be like “so am I invited to the wedding?” It’s rude and puts you in a really weird spot of either saying yes or having to say no. 

 My little story of someone assuming they are invited-

~I had a girl I worked with who I hung out with a couple times outside of work, but she quit a couple months ago and I haven’t talked to her since. When we hung out a couple times she’d bring up my wedding and wanting to go and I’d always tell her that we’re keeping the guest list small to save on money and that we really want to do only close family and friends. I figured that was an understanding that I wouldn’t be inviting her…well she stopped into work the other day to say hi to everyone and comes up to me and says “Hey just wanted to let you know I got a dress for your wedding and I’m either going to bring Jake, Kyle, or Mark” (I don’t remember the exact guys names) She then went on to say it’s between these guys because she’s trying to figure out who she’d have more fun drinking and dancing with. I was in shock my jaw just dropped. 

Post # 9
Member
20 posts
Newbee

Tell her your guest list is full. End of story. That is just ridiculous 

Post # 10
Member
1044 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@LiliKitty:  I know! I would never say that to someone!

Post # 11
Member
160 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I have found this a lot with younger people, women especially (guys don’t seem to care as much, I guess!). I had a not-so-close friend ask me if she was invited. Luckily, she immediately followed it up with, “It’s ok if I’m not, I know weddings are expensive.” And why is it’s always the people who aren’t invited are the ones to ask…?

Post # 12
Member
11753 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

i wish this would happen to me – i think it’s fun coming up with funny ways to tell rude people off!

Post # 13
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Our gave us this doozy a few weeks ago… “I hope you arent doing it March 23rd because we already have a wedding to go to that weekend and we dont want to miss yours!” LOL. I was like… what?? We have only lived here a few months and hardly know you lady!

 

Post # 14
Member
3698 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Good for you for the way you handled it! I’ve had a couple people come up to me and flat out ask if they can come to the wedding. It’s such an uncomfortable situation and I don’t think fast enough on my feet.

Post # 15
Member
170 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

lol this happened to me on FB of course (where else) I announced my wedding date and an old friend who i have not seen in years and who didn’t invite me to her wedding said ” I better get an invite” she also happens to be the same person who asked me to be a bridesmaid then unasked me…..yah no your not getting an invite, i didn’t even respond but she will figure that out when my wedding passes and she doesn’t receive an invite.

Post # 16
Member
3199 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This kinda reminds me of someone (the only person) I feel obligated to invite. A day or so after we set a date/location I was catching up with a law school “friend.” We’re cool and all, have been shopping together and have done lunch from time to time, but we’re not besties by any stretch (also I think she think more highly of me than I think of her) said “well just make sure you invite me, ok?!” and I was so giddy and happy and not thinking straight. I just said “uh huh. sure” and kept talking about whatever I was talking about. We have only had one conversation since then– and it wasn’t really pleasant. She said some things about my FH that I took as disrespectful. It’s been 2 months or more. In that same conversation she told me about her new “boo” and remarked that she’ll be bringing him to the wedding and treat it as a romatic vacay for them. M’eh. I really wouldn’t mind if she didn’t come (especially given that I don’t intend to invite this guy I’ve never met to my 40-person wedding).

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