(Closed) "It's your wedding" – anyone sick of hearing this?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@NYCowgirl:  ahaha yeah, this is the ultimate annoying passive-aggressive manipulation.

Post # 4
Member
983 posts
Busy bee

That statement is getting old.  I feel for ya. 

Post # 6
Member
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Whenever someone says that to me I always want to say, “well if it was really my wedding we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation..”

 

 

Elopement starts to sound pretty nice : )

Post # 8
Member
3001 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@ellyse:  hahaha yes

I keep hearing ‘its your wedding’ followed with ‘but I really like xyandz’

-_-

Post # 9
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I wanted to elope, but the family would not have let me get away with that, which is annoying.

I didn’t discuss any aspect of my wedding with anybody.

Post # 10
Member
3156 posts
Sugar bee

FMIL is planning and financing 90% of our wedding. She tried the “It’s your wedding” once and FH was like, “No, not really. It’s your wedding.” I wanted to elope, she wanted a wedding, so she’s planning it with little to no input from me.

Post # 12
Member
1548 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

When people say “its your wedding” as a passive agressive comment to me, I usually follow it up with “you’re right, it is my wedding, I’ll do as I please” – it usually shuts them up. 

Post # 13
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@NYCowgirl:  the groomsmen didn’t care about the details, and my bridesmaids’ only concern was the dress color I wanted. both sets of parents were respectful of the fact that DH and I were paying for it ourselves, so basically nobody got any input whatsoever because I didn’t ask for any opinions nor discussed any of it.

Post # 15
Member
5969 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@NYCowgirl:  Brides are delicate creatures and I avoid them when I can because before you even know what happened, you have stepped on some delicate toes without even meaning to…whenever one asks my opinion I’ll actually reply with a question instead of answering and usually that works pretty well, because it’s not even important, what I think….as long as she’s happy we’re all going to win….on the rare occasion that a bride gets wise to my tricks and corners me on something I will avoid making a declarative statement at all costs…because there is no right answer, and that’s what no one gets.

In my past experience, and I’m not implying you are even remotely this extreme that this is what happens:

If I agree with her, then I’m just giving her lip service…I don’t care…I’m lying

If I tell her what I think I’ll be treated to a snarky lecture about why I’m wrong and this thing is awesome OR I don’t understand, I’m wrong about her “vision”….

Either way, there is no winning in this scenario…only varying degrees of loss….so its my understanding that, “It’s your wedding.” is actually code for, “PLEASE DON’T STAB ME!!!  I WANT WHATEVER YOU WANT!!!”

Post # 16
Hostess
2556 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Yup, I’m over this saying already.  Thankfully, we haven’t heard it much now that we’re kind of in that lull between booking all the important things and really planning details.

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