Post # 1
I think I can start yelling and screaming and throwing stuff off the balcony at any time now… I am going to BLOW! I have talked to him about it several times and it’s always the same answer…. “It’s temporary!”
Hoarding is just not my thing… Fiance says it’s temporary… But when does the “temporary” become permanent? One week, one month, months, years?
The tires that are in my our livingroom has been there since February. Let’s see… this temporary arrangement has lasted… 7 months! And still going strong as “temporary”.
The spare room is just breeding bags and things and stuff all on its own… again, temporary. We now can’t close the door and can’t get inside at all. It is ceiling high…
The TV in the bedroom closet, the spare van seat on the bedroom floor, the tables and sound system set around the bed, making it IMPOSSIBLE to put clothes away… the closet is inaccessible with the van seat and bags of clean clothes. Can’t open drawers becasue I only have a few inches between the dressers and the bed, can’t really walk around the bed because of the above mentioned items…
So What to do? I have decided to stop ignoring the issue and gasp… stop weddingbee posting for one whole week, 7 days… until I get this under control!
Who will support me on this? I will check this thread and this thread only!!!
Here is one example, of course you don’t seee the surrounding floor… But I will post before and after pics of all the other rooms in a thread called “Hoarding Conquered” in 7 days!
Post # 3
I totally 100% support you and I really hope you can get your Fiance to help with the big clean out. I worry that if you do it all, he’ll get upset that you got rid of “his” stuff, or that you’ll just make him think you’ll do it over and over for him and he won’t have to ever confront the issue.
My Darling Husband is a bit of a packrat too, and I book off days (like this later this afternoon actually!) where I say ‘Okay, you’re going to clean up X area, and I’m going to clean up Y area’ and we work on it together so it’s not so overwhelming for him.
Sending you lots of happy clutter free thoughts!!! Good luck!!!
Post # 4
Good luck! Why IS there so much stuff? Are you moving? Is Fiance a hoarder? Whats the deal?
Post # 5
Oh! I don’t know how many times I have to nag on my Fiance to hlep me out clean his clutter.. circuit boards and cables everywhere.. his books everywhere.. It doesn’t take that long to clean, and stack away, but it would be so nice if he could do it himself sometimes! He always say: ” I’ll do it soon honey, just leave it be”.. LOL
Good luck with your “project”, hope you get it sorted out soon!
Post # 6
You poor dear. Now I feel bad for nagging Darling Husband for wearing his shoes indoors and leaving empty popcans in the living room. Good luck making major progess this week!
Post # 8
DON’T DO THIS! Not by yourself, I mean.
1) It’s not fair to you to pick up after his exploded messes,
2) It trains him he can do this whenever he wants and not care about the mess (as you will eventually pick it up)
3) There’s no telling what he wants and what is legitimate trash. (Note, I did not say “Legit,” as that is not a legitimate word…. *hint hint, other bees!*)
Instead, I propose you give him a timeline (you thought you were done with those, didn’t you?) to clean up a particular room. If he doesn’t clean room X by Y date, all the shit on the floor / not belonging in the room goes right in the trash. No questions asked.
Hopefully that will hold his feet to the fire and get him moving. Space out the rooms so he can time manage and staggar himself. It seems like there are a lot of out of control rooms going on. Furthermore, you guys clean stuff for a living, right? Not many people are fond of “working” on their time off…. that’s kind of bringing work home with him, so be patient with your timeline dates to account for the groan period that’s bound to happen. Be supportive but firm. He can do it!
Post # 9
@happyface: I am so sorry for you. I moved in with my Darling Husband a few years ago and he is from a long line of hoarders. Luckily he is a placid guy and didn’t mind that I overtook his place and made it into a minimalist haven.
Unfortunatey with the way my Darling Husband is I just have to follow him around and pick up his trash/mess. Its like he dosen’t see it at all. I used to argue with him all the time trying to get him to pick up after himself/keep things the way I like them. At the moment I have just given up on that and just manage the house myself.
I wish you the best of luck!
Post # 10
PS: Until he cleans, change your avatar to ““
Post # 11
@StuporDuck: But, but ,but
- He also has a day job and I don’t!
- I am the one who is sick of this, he isn’t
- My stuff is in those piles because I had to move in , in a hurry because of my house renovations
- There is literally no place to put anything except hang stuff from the ceiling? Ha Ha!
So, I will document everything for you bees, on how I will tackle this problem, maybe he will help, maybe not, but all I know is that I just can’t breathe anymore… and want to stay on the computer chatting on weddingbee because it’s my “escape”!
Post # 12
@happyface: You can do it!
Post # 13
@happyface: Ok, after that clarification, you win.
Know what might be helpful? What about these sorts of shelves?
And these handy dandy vacuum bags:
Or this closet doo-dad
Post # 14
Tires in the living room? Oh hell no, I’d be throwing shit out left and right. I’m not a complete neat freak, but I can’t stand clutter. A little bit is fine, but if it gets to be too much, it gets tossed.
Post # 15
Good luck cleaning. It sounds like he needs a better organization/storage system for his stuff.
Post # 16
@StuporDuck: Thanks for those suggestions! I will be making notes on what I need and getting them!
@MrsBlueSeptember: I am a neat freak but I gave up. Things like tires we need because they’re going to go on our cars for the winter… but I just thought of something… where are the summer tires going? sigh.