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Am I being irrational?

I've received "nos" from Save the Dates, what should I do?

posted 1 year ago in Etiquette
  •  
    1.
    Member
    269 posts
    Helper bee
    eholland    January 2012  

    I sent out my Save the Dates a few weeks or a month ago.  They've all gone out.  One of my very good friends told me he can't make it because of a work conflict.  Should I still send him a invitation?  What's the proper etiquette?  Thanks hive!

     
    2.
    Bee Icon
    Bee
    916 posts
    Busy bee
    snow      

    Yes... you can still send the invite. They may not be able to come, but their plans may also change. The invite signals that you still want them included as part of your day. 

     
    3.
    Member
    1,644 posts
    Bumble bee
    Mermaid1082    September 4, 2010   St Louis, MO

    Yep, still send an invite.  You never know when plans will change and they can come anyway.

     

     
    4.
    Member
    2,742 posts
    Sugar bee
    ktisthatbees    May 1, 2011   Atlanta GA/Charleston SC

    Still send the invite. plans can change, plus you want them to feel included even if they can't make it. If they question why you sent the invite anyway, just explain that what you sent out first was more of a heads up than a formal invite and that you wanted to make sure they knew they were appreciated and thought of.

     
    5.
    Member
    269 posts
    Helper bee
    eholland    January 2012  

    Thank you for the replies, hive.  Sending the invite sounds like the way to go.  I just want to do what's right with reference to the people I want there, ie, let them know I want them there, while also letting them know that I don't expect them to rearrange their lives to make it happen. 

     
    6.
    Member
    664 posts
    Busy bee
    pren79    10/17/09   SF Bay Area

    I would also enclose a little card that says "sorry that you cannot make it. We wish you well. Hope we can hang out sometime soon" or something of that sort. This is so that you let them know that you already know that he can't come.

     
    7.
    Member
    6,816 posts
    Busy
    Beekeeper
    moderndaisy    June 2010  

    He does realize your wedding is NEXT year, right? Most companies don't schedule things a year out like that..

    Yes, you can still send him an invitation, because he is still invited. I was annoyed when I would ask people for their address and they wouldn't give it to me because they coudln't make it. I was like Grrr.. you're still invited and getting an invitation so fork it over! In my case I think it was a way out of buying a present..

     
    8.
    Member
    524 posts
    Busy bee
    futurediplomatswife    October 9, 2010   Washington, DC/Palo Alto, CA

    Definitely, still send one!  Even though he jumped the gun on the RSVP, it's important to confirm that he was to be included.  It's the classy gesture.

     

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