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Jealous much?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
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    1.
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    shopgirl616      

    How are you dealing with people making comments about your wedding? Have you come across any negative comments being made about your wedding? I recently experienced someone calling my wedding REDNECK because it's in a tent. Frankly, this person's opinion means nothing to me (she's trash) but still the comment was quite hurtful. Oh and did I mention we will be family soon? How should I handle this?

     
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    Buzzing bee
    pvaulter718    September 5, 2009   Pennsylvania

    I'm going to start with "Everyone has their own opinions".  Following this, I must mention that some people's opinions are stupid (ha).  Some people will give you unwelcomed and unneeded advice.  Remember that this day is about what you and your fiance want, and brush off their comments.  Focus on the reasons you are so excited to have your tented wedding, what it is about that that makes it "you".  And if you feel so inclined, the next time she calls your wedding redneck, tell her that you think it is ________. 

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    gidget145      

    $crew her! let your haters be your motivators! just smile because trying to deal with her will waste your much needed energy for your wedding! Jealous much? :  wedding emotional Icon Razz

     
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    Helper bee
    kenziegirl    July 9, 2008   Seattle

    I have dealt with that, and the easiest thing to do is let it roll off your back.

     

    You can't please everyone when planning  your wedding, what matters is that you like it. Calling someone names and pointing out nasty things that they've said or done isn't going to help anyone.

    Do what you feel is best (who cares if it's in a tent, or you're serving sandwiches, or your budget is $1k, or you're not serving alcohol?) and plan out your day to suit you and your fiance, and just let it go.

    If I let every little comment or jab bother me, I would have been a cranky basket case and that just wasn't worth it for me. 

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    1. Jealous much? :  wedding emotional Img IMG_3919.JPG (1387.9 KB, 40 downloads) 1 year old
     
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    Worker bee
    Chianti    July 23, 2010   Northern Virginia

    Wow - that's harsh - and hurtful, despite the fact that the person's opnion in and of itself means nothing to you. Regardless, it still hurts, especially when you've put so much of yourself into the planning of your special day.

    The fact that this person will be family soon only makes it more difficult. Unfortunately, it's been my experience that my wedding has a tendency to bring out the worst in people, and especially my family, in particular. And try as hard as I can, their comments - and lack of enthusiasm about my planning - is really hurtful no matter how much I try to say to myself that I don't care what they think. 

    Is this person going to be close family you'll have to deal with regularly, or is she extended family whom you'll likely have infrequent contact with? If it's the first, you may have to sit down and tell her how much her comment hurt you, but if it's the latter, I don't know that confronting her will do much good and you may have to try to just let the comment roll off you as best you can.

    The only thing I can suggest is to try to remember what your wedding is about - you and your FH - whenever things like this get you down. Do you have something in particular that makes you smile whenever you see it or think about it? For me, it's my dress. Whenever I start to feel down or upset about my family, I just look at the pic of my dress, close my eyes and imagine myself in it on my wedding day, with my FI smiling at me. Does the trick every time for me.

     
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    shopgirl616      

    Chianti,

     That is such great advice. Think about sometihng that makes you happy about your wedding. I tried it and its like the worries are not even there anymore. Frankly the comment about tent's being redneck is somewhat absurd. People have receptions in tents all the time!

    Unfortunately, yes, she will be family. Fortunately, however, she is not close enough where I have to see her often. There's been a long history there that I do not want to get into but let's just leave it as she's not nice, never been nice, never will be nice. I guess there are just some bitter people out there.

     
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    Worker bee
    Chianti    July 23, 2010   Northern Virginia

    Shopgirl616 - it's always worked for me! I'm glad it helped you.

    And yes, there are people out there who don't know how to be anything but bitter. If she's always been this way, just chalk it up to her being her and ignore it. Not only do people have receptions in tents all the time, they're often very elegant ones at that! You have a vision of your perfect day - don't let anyone else mar it for you. Make it a reflection of you and your FI - it'll be absolutely lovely!

     

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