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Anyone?
*This should probably be in the NWR section. If someone could move, that would be helpful. Thanks!
There is literally a Judaism for Dummies book. It's $15 on amazon. Also, you should just ask your husband what he believes rather than try to figure out what the religion teaches. Just like Christians, there are a wide range of beliefs amongs Jewish people.
1. Yes, technically required multiple times a day
2. Yes but probably not the "hell or heaven" you think of. this explains it well
3. not sure how to answer this or what you mean
I think it is great that you are wanting to know this. DH and I are not Jewish, we are Bnai Noah (Children of Noah, non-Jews). There is still tons of stuff I dont know a bout Judiasm. I am interested in reading the responses that you get. A lot of things depend on the type of Jew your DH is (reform, conservative, Orthodox, etc).
Good luck!!
@ETwedding: This thread stemmed from me asking my hubby questions about heaven (as I just finished reading "Heaven Is For Real"). I get the feeling that whenever we discuss religion-related topics, he's just NOT that religious at all. So, I'm trying to learn more because I feel like maybe I'm asking the wrong questions (which might seem ridiculous to him).
P.S. I just might have to buy that book! Thanks!
@bestbuddies: Thank you for your responses! I especially look forward to reading about heaven/hell. I also need to ask my hubby why he tells me "Jews don't pray"?!?! I believe his family members are Reform Jews, but I should doublecheck. I apologize if my third question was unclear. I guess what I'm trying to ask is...IF a person that believes in Jesus or was baptised is considered a Chrisitian, what would a person of the Jewish faith be considered? Is the BAR/BATmitzvah the event where you become a believer/follower?
Just like there lots of different type of Christian faiths that all believe slightly different things, the same goes for Jews.
You're husband sounds like a cultural Jew. This is what I consider myself. I identify as Jewish although I am not religious (I was raised reformed), don't know a lot about the religious side of things (although I did go to Hebrew Sunday school and was bat mitzvahed). I do still practice a lot of the traditions because I enjoy them and they have meaning to me since I was raised with them. We celebrate some of the holidays (my FI is not Jewish), but less since we moved away from my family. When we have kids, we plan to raise them Jewish, so we will celebrate the holidays more completely then and likely join a temple again so my kids can go to Hebrew Sunday school.
If you have any specific questions I can try to answer them. Feel free to PM me. I'm sure the questions you have aren't dumb, as it's hard learning a religion you weren't raised with.
P.S. His parents would likely want you to convert so that the children are Jewish. By Jewish law religion is passed through the mother, so the only way to have Jewish children is to have a Jewish mother.
@melisslp: I have the Judiasm for Dummies book, its pretty good but also very general. BAR/BATmitzvah = children are not obligated to live under the convenents of Moses but this ceremony formally, publicly marks the assumption of that obligation and other things.
@melisslp: No, a Bar/Bat Mitzvah is when one is considered an adult in the Jewish faith. Someone is Jewish if their mother is Jewish (or father, if you are reform), or if they convert. One does not need to pray in order to be Jewish. I really think you should talk with you husband about the details of his faith (or lackthereof). Besides, no one who's Jewish would force someone else to convert, so I don't think you need to be worried about your in-laws "forcing" you. (During the conversion process, one is discouraged a number of times by the Rabbi before proceeding, to ensure one isn't "pressured.)
Also, just like there are many different sects of Christianity, there are also different sects of Judaism. There isn't just one catch-all answer to your questions. If you are really interested in Judaism, and he's interested in attending, I'd suggest you guys attend a Judaism 101 class together. It would answer your questions (based on which group runs the course) and might be good for you to understand where he and his family come from.
According to the Reform faith, only one parent needs to be Jewish in order for your children to be considered Jewish. Therefore, your children would be recognized as Jewish at a Reform synagogue.
I highly recommend doing some reading, if anything to understand the cultural aspects of Judaism, which are just as important as any spiritual connection to the religion. If your husband is a little rusty in his knowledge, I highly recommend taking a class together at a local synagogue if there is one available to you. We did this when we got engaged, and even though I have not converted, I feel so lucky to have been educated on that part of my husband's background. There are so many beautiful things about Judaism that you will probably really enjoy, particularly since you are Catholic. My BFF was raised Catholic but recently because interested in becoming Jewish, and she actually told me that there are a lot of similarities between Catholicism and Judaism, strange as that might sound.
Good luck!
@flutterbi: You are probably right! He went to Sunday School, was Bar Mitzvah'd, and that was pretty much the end of it. He celebrates Hannukah (i.e. lights the candles and says the prayer), but that's about it (unless, his family is in town). If I think of any other questions for you, I'll definitely let you know. Thanks again!
@bestbuddies: Thanks for the heads-up about the book. I always thought the Bar/Bat Mitzvah was when you come of age and agree to follow the "laws" of Judiasm.
@rachaelrobin: I definitely plan to talk more with my husband about his faith (or lack of faith). I appreciate your input about having a conversation with my in-laws, however, I'm going to hold off. Thanks again for your advice and suggestions!
@Miss Root: Thanks for your explanations! From my discussions with his parents, it does sound as if both faiths have a lot in common. I really enjoyed reading the information that daniellealys shared with me about heaven/hell, because that is what sparked this thread. I will definitely look into taking a course with my hubby, if he's open to it (especially if we decide to have a child in the near future).
P.S. Your pic is adorable!
I'm learning a lot from this thread, thanks for asking about this Melisslp!
bar/bat mitzvah for Jews is kind of like Confirmation for Christians, if you're looking for some kind of comparison. It's not exactly the same, but to give you an idea. You're becoming a man/woman, rather than a child, and are ready to take on the responsibilities, whether faith based or not, at that point in your life.
Also - the things that are done in these ceremonies vary on a large scale depending on what sect you're part of.
I am a traditional Jew with a good background.
There are thousands of useful rules and authoritative sources that could inform you. Simply, Judaism itself, regards being Jewish as a heritage and not a faith. Of course, it is a faith, but you are Jewish if you are born Jewish regardless of what you do or believe. Similarly, if you are born in the USA then you are a citizen, even if you hate democracy or never have turkey on Thanksgiving.
To take the analogy further, if you are Hungarian, living in Budapest, then you are not American even if you light fireworks on July 4th, pledge allegiance to Old Glory, watch Monday night football religiously, etc.
Judaism has many many rules. It is fair to call it a religion of actions rather than beliefs There are specific prayers to be recited three times each day. There are specifically worded prayers over food and drink (different ones for different ingredients), prayers after eating, prayers upon waking, prayers upon seeing something for the first time, for seeing a long lost friend, for traveling a great distance, for surviving a life threatening danger, even for seeing a hideously ugly person. There are proper ways to eat, to pray, even to tie one's shoes. BUT the essence of Judaism (and this is uniformly agreed upon by all sages over millennia) is to impart moral behavior.
The most urgent laws, which must be followed even if doing so breaks other Jewish laws, are those regarding life and health. You must be honest. You must be charitable. You must give medical aid when needed, and strive to save lives. You must celebrate at weddings and you must drop all tasks to help bury the body of one who has died.
If a person needs to eat non kosher food for some medical purpose, then they MUST eat the non kosher food. If a pregnancy threatens the mother's life, then she MUST terminate the pregnancy. This 2,000 yr old ruling likens the fetus to a stalking killer, and you must protect the life from the inchoate threat.
Be good to people, because the Lord made all of creation in order to give Jews the chance to be heavenly rather than animalistic. All people are mammals who want food, sex, and happiness. Jewish law tries to force us to act with the betterment of the world and other people as our goals as we live in the physical world.
It is a far cry from a Christian idea that we toil in this world to enjoy the next kingdom. If spiritual matters were all that interested G-d, then it stands to reason that we do not need the physical world. Judaism sees this world as a dimension created solely to bring spirituality into the physical realm. There is a concept of heaven, but this world matters bc G-d made it and put us in it.
Last, just as American laws apply to all people in the USA even if they don't agree or concent, Jewish law applies to all Jews even if they don't practice or believe. Wishing you endless happiness together.
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Hello Bees,
I need a "Jewish Faith for Dummies" crash course! My husband is Jewish and I am Catholic. Although we have been married for 15 months now and have known eachother for nearly 4 years, I still feel like I don't know much about his religion. The reason I am asking for help here is because I am trying to figure out if my husband lacks knowledge about his religion or if he is just not a believer in his faith. I would ask his parents, but I'm sure they'll work on having me convert (like they did his brother's wives). Feel free to share with me the basics, including the following: 1. Do Jews pray? 2. Do Jews believe in Heaven? 3. What is the equivalent of being a Christian in the Jewish faith? If I seem like an idiot, I apologize.
Thanks for your help!
melisslp