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I have a teaching interview next week (as a side note, thanks all you teacher bees for help on the phone interview - apparently it went well!), and I remember reading something a while back about how you shouldn't wear your engagement ring on an interview. Why is this? Anyone have thoughts about it? Should I keep it on or take it off? Also, any tips on what to wear would be great too.. I was thinking pantsuit (or blazer and skirt) but is this too formal/boring for a HS teaching job? I know teachers typically don't wear suits to work, but are you supposed to get more dressed up for an interview? Anyway, I was just curious about the ring/interview issue. Thanks!
I've never heard any advice about not wearing an engagement ring to a job interview, and I don't think there is anything wrong with wearing it, or conversely, not wearing it. I wouldn't do anything to bring attention to it (like fidgeting with it or anything), but I don't see a problem with it!
Definitely go with some sort of a suit, whether it be pant or skirt, with either a pressed button down shirt, or a nice sweater underneath. You want to dress your best to present yourself well, regardless of how you may dress once you start the job.
GOOD LUCK!!!
I wore my ring to an interview, and I got the job :D.
I was always told as a rule of thumb to dress two steps above what you would normally wear in the position you are applying for. So in that case, a pant suit or the skirt and blazer are probably right on target.
I am a teacher too, and wearing a suit to interviews is a must! Also, you may want to make sure you wear a blouse under your blazer, not just a cami. I don't know where you live, but if you wear a skirt suit, make sure you wear pantyhose and closed-toe shoes...some areas are really strict about the little stuff. I'd def wear my ring and be proud though! Good luck!
Ooooh there was a long thread about this a while back I think. From what I remember, the arguments against wearing your ring fell into 2 camps, 1) the employer will assume that you, as a woman, are either going to be too busy planning a wedding to get the job done right (if you're only wearing an e-ring) or will be planning on getting pregnant and taking time off and 2) it's "flaunting wealth". I'd like to say I don't agree with either argument, but I don't have any experience with which to back that up. Either way I will probably be wearing my engagement ring to any interview I attend.
I think you can't go wrong with a suit or a blazer and a skirt. I always think it's better to be a bit more dressed up than to be dressed down and appear sloppy. Shows you care about getting the job, IMO.
Oh and good luck!!
I wore my engagement ring to a job interview and they asked me if they would have to worry about me taking time off for a wedding and honeymoon. I was caught a little off guard considering it was my first interview with them and it was extremely short. Not sure if that was appropriate. I didn't end up taking the job
I didn't wear my engagement ring to my job interview (at a hospital). I knew they were looking for someone more permanent, and would probably think that I wouldn't be available come wedding/honeymoon time. I got the job and ended up wearing my ering to the orientation. The manager raised an eyebrow and said "oh! you're engaged?!" Hell yes I am.
Blouse, blazer, pants or skirt, hose, closed two shoes.
I don't think there's anything wrong with you wearing a ring-- in fact I think teaching might look more favorably on a ring. (I do agree that some jobs might get wary about vacation-time, but most schools have summers off for a wedding/honeymoon!)
I'm a law student, and a few months ago I did a ton of interviews with big firms. The career services office at my school actually told us that young engaged/married women should take off our rings. I was shocked, but it made sense (law firms don't want to hire someone who will get pregnant and become a SAHM after a couple years, or someone who will end up being gone a lot for maternity leave).
I didn't do it though. I felt like it was lying (they'd find out I was married eventually anyway!). I did really well in interview season anyway and got a job with my first-choice firm. I just think it's sad that a career services office would feel the need to suggest something like that.
I think a suit is appropriate for any interview!
Interestingly enough, married men were told to DEFINITELY wear their rings... apparently for men it's a sign of commitment and work ethic (shows they have a family to support). Crazy.
@WantToBeM.E.: I'm in Boston so I'd be wearing pantyhose or freezing my butt off! And I've always been on the side of never wearing open toed shoes to anything related to work. Thanks for the tips.
@littlegraykitten: Very interesting! Wouldn't the first one be discrimination? I guess you could never prove it though.. I think my ring is an average size for this area and wouldn't draw attention to my finger, so I guess I'll wear it!
@Gabrielle123: Wow I can't believe they were so blunt about it! Maybe I'll prepare myself for this.. it may actually be an issue though because we picked our wedding date before I knew I would be graduating and possibly starting a new job in the fall. I'm assuming I would need a couple days off before the wedding but I was planning on postponing the honeymoon.
I think it depends on the place. I am a teacher and teachers go on maternity all the time. My principal and many others in the district are all moms and are VERY accomidating to that sort of thing, very supportive! But in other jobs yes, they do get more uppity about leaving to go on maternity. (But if you are getting married it might be awhile before getting pregnant and such...some people are so weird!)
My old job was at a big corporate type setting. You know, the kind where you play the game where you're the first one there and the last one to leave, so no one leaves until at least 10 hours after they came in because no one wants to be the slacker and no one dare leaves until all people who rank higher than them have left. Well my boss who was in charge of hiring people said flat out that he looks at people's ring finger to see if they're married/engaged or not and prefers singles because "they don't rush out of here to go see their family". Needless to say my jaw dropped when he said it, but I took it to heart. I never wear my rings on interviews. JUUUUUUUST in case someone else thinks like him.
@mrscheetos: That's kinda funny.. I wonder if it would have made a difference in the hiring decision. I'd hate to think that employers really will chose one candidate over another because one is getting married!
@Porkchop: Yeah the poll seems pretty one-sided!
@bookworm88: I know, I'm kicking myself for planning a fall wedding :/ Oh well, it's on Columbus day weekend, so hopefully I can just take a couple personal days the week before and postpone the honeymoon.
@bluebonnet: That's true, I feel like I'd be lying if they found out later I was getting married. I guess it does make sense, and what a double standard for the guys!
@Nicoley1985: I'm not so sure either, but I didn't want to risk it, I needed the job! lol
@Angelz_love: That's true.. I wonder if it matters if you are being interviewed by a man or a woman too. I think it would be different if a married mom was interviewing you as they might be more sympathetic.
@yellowshoe: Wow.. that's why I could never cut in a corporate job! Hopefully they'll be more lenient for teachers.. at least the hours are shorter!
I could see taking it off for an interview depending on the job. I think it's sad that it needs to be considered, but it's the way things for.
For a teacher interview I would leave it. I really can't see it making a difference as many teachers are also moms, so I don't think a ring would affect whether or not you're hired.
@Nicoley1985: yes, same reason I got out. It wasn't for me either! lol and btw I always wish I had gone the route of a grade school teacher. *sigh* GOOD LUCK with your interview!
I never took mine off for an interview. I understand that there's a possibility of a negative association with it, but it's part of who I am, and I'd hope the my resume would overpower it.
That said, for my current job, I wore my engagement ring, and even ended up mentioning several interviews in that I'd need to adjust their preferred start date due to my wedding and honeymoon. They wanted me, so they waited for me to start till after I got home from Maui.
P.S. Good luck!
@AB Bride: True.. I feel naked without my ring anyway so i'd rather leave it on!
@yellowshoe: I'm actually getting out of science and going toward the route of teaching (well hopefully if I can get a job since I have no real experience). Everyone is like "whatttt?!" but I'm finishing my PhD now and canNOT imagine going the academic route.. it's so cut-throat. I'm glad I at least found my passion semi-early on in my career.
@Gemstone: Yeah I am also wondering about vacation time and personal days since I will need a few days off, but I'm not sure if this is okay to bring up or not. I guess worst case I'll take sick days even though it'd be pretty obvious I'd be leaving for my wedding haha.
Ooooh as a fellow teacher - to be honest - I've considered taking mine off for interviews before. It can't hurt, you know? Employers don't have the right to ask, but you can bet that if they do and you refuse to answer, the job will go to someone else. I agree with PPs about dressing up as well!
@Nicoley1985: Time off, especially a one-time thing like wedding/honeymoon, is something you can negotiate about once you've received an offer. You could let them know upfront that you'll need the time, and see if it can be arranged.
Another option, though it's not ideal, is to take a few days of unpaid vacation.
@Juliepants: Oh that'd be a doozy...
"So I see you have an engagement ring on.. are you getting married?"
"No comment."
Awkward silence... haha
@Gemstone: Good to know.. I've been in college and grad school so long that I know nothing about personal days vs unpaid vacation vs anything else
All my professors said to never wear it on an interview. It tells them you will be taking a vacation soon or something like that.
@Nicoley1985: I agree with Gemstone here. Don't be the first to bring up benefits or even the salary. After you get a call back with an offer you can inquire or start negotiating.
I didn't have any interviews while engaged, but I have had a few since getting married. I take my engagement ring off and just wear my wedding band for the interview.
@newenglandgirl: Interesting. I wish there was a course on "Dos and Don'ts of Interviews" I could have taken in college... it would have been way more useful than that dumb Victorian Lit class I was forced into taking!
@JoJo Bananas: That's what I figured.. I know salary talk is a no-no. I hope it isn't just assumed I will be taking off weeks and weeks for a honeymoon, since I'll actually plan on postponing it for my job.
@Nicoley1985: Careerbuilder and monster have tons and tons of advice articles that are quite helpful. I agree that I wish I had had more career guidance during college. I probably would have majored in something different.
@JoJo Bananas: Didn't even think to look there.. thanks! I wish I would have just majored in education and saved myself from all this grad school nonsense that I won't even be using.
I'd wear my rings - if someone is going to hold a prejudice against me for being a married/engaged women, then it isn't someone I would want to work for anyway! Plenty of married women are very career minded.
I just know too many people who hate their life 40 hours a week because of bad work environments and, despite the economy, I'd personally rather spend a little longer job searching and end up in a good environment where people don't make rash and unbased assumptions about me than take a job that someone wouldn't have offered me if I'd been wearing my e-ring to the interview.
Oh - and I always wear a suit to every interview. This seems very appropriate for an interview for a teaching position. Good luck!
@Mrs.KMM: Well said.. I agree!
I'm not sure how the school/teaching hiring works, but I know for legal interviews, I leave mine at home and only wear a simple necklace. Unfortutely, women in the workforce are still judged under certain contexts, and even though they can't ask (like @Juliepants: said), it's hella awkward if they comment on your ring and you are basically forced to answer. I'd wear a suit with a nice blouse/top, but I feel like you can be a little more free with fun colors for your shirt (legal is a lot of blue/grey/white...bleh!).
Is not wearing your ring lying? Not really, you don't NEED to wear a ring to be married. Is it wrong for them to discriminate based on the amount of time off they assume you'll need or the # of babies you'll shortly be popping out? Of course! I'd rather get in based on my credentials than be pushed out of the running before I even get the chance because one hiring nimwit thinks I'll be out of the workforce in 2-4 years or that my hubs is wealthy so I don't really need the job and can leave when I want.
@Nicoley1985: I actually had a class like that in college, resume writing, how to interview...things like that. It was a very career focused school. Not at all an interesting class but useful. None of those teachers said not to wear one, that was mentioned in all my business classes. And all those professors were former or still current business executives and owners so that always stuck with me.
I wore my wedding set to my last two interviews and got offered both jobs. I didn't want to be lying, and I didn't want to be hired based on my marital status. As for taking a few days off for wedding and honeymoon... why would they care? People take vacations all the time. If I had an interview with someone who would rather hire someone less qualified just so they wouldn't have to find coverage for a vacation sounds lazy to me and I wouldn't want to work for them anyways.
I hope these antiquated ideas about women in the work force die out soon.
Dress like the professional you are!
In a school setting you technically are not supposed to take a vacation on school days. Your vacation time is technically the same time as the students's vacation time. Some administrators would not have a problem with you taking the time off to get married/honeymoon. However, any school district's official stance is that sick days are for being sick, not for marrying, honeymooning. You may get a few personal days. We get 3 for the entire school year. If you want to marry/honeymoon during the school year, keep this in mind when you make your decision about your ring. Actually, to be honest, I wouldn't take time off during the school year because I wouldn't want to come back to the mess and the lost educational time left because of there being a sub in my place. And, some might question your dedication to your job if you left during the school year. You would really need to read who you are working for and working with once you get the job.
@NDBee: It seems like the more competitive jobs with long hours look at this more than others, which I guess makes sense. It would suck to be out of the running based on a little thing like a ring, though.
@newenglandgirl: That would have been helpful!
@Moja Milosc: I agree.
@2ndtime: See that's the problem.. haha I wear jeans to lab everyday now (I mean there's no use in dressing up to do experiements and spill bacteria all over myself) so I have no idea how to be professional! I'll dress like the professional I hope to be soon! And I know, I want to be dedicated to my job but I think there's no way around taking at least two personal days off before the wedding. I'll definitely postpone the honeymoon, but a couple days off should be okay I imagine.
I wore mine and got the job I currently have. I think it sets a statement of being responsible and an adult. But that's me.
This is depressing. No one would blink an eye at a man wearing a wedding ring to an interview. Ugh.
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