- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
Sorry I don't find it funny at all. How does he know there isn't a history of violence? I am sorry if this was a bee who came on here and said her husband pushed her and grabbed her neck; we would all be upset and tell her to leave. Wait, there was a thread like that not too long ago! Way to make a joke of DV judge; hope they don't appear in his court again.
@redheadem: That is TERRIBLE. The wife needs for her husband to get counseling - not to be told by a judge that if her husband treats her nice on occasion, the problem is solved.
I disagree with this sentence, 110%.
Hmm, I'm not personally a fan, because shoving your wife against the couch and grabbing her throat ≠ 'minor' DV in my opinion. This judge better hope that things don't escalate for this couple :-/
O_O Disgusting. Shoving a woman against a couch and grabbing her neck is a minor offense? UGHHHH.
Hmmmmmmm sounds like the judge felt the incident was minor based on history, and even says he doesn't normally treat cases like this so 'lightly'......and it sounds like it started because he didn't wish her a Happy Birthday - in my mind this isn't some beaten woman cowering in the corner. My guess is they were both going at each other and she blew her lid and pressed charges.
Obviously that is all just guesswork....but none of us really know what happened - were there bruises, did she testify that she was afraid of him? We don't know, so in this case, I'm going with the judge, because he has all the facts (well, more facts), and we don't.
This rubs me the wrong way. It's like the judge is saying "It's okay, just take her out for a nice night and all is forgiven." Like taking a woman out for a nice night is any sort of punishment for physical violence.
@hisgoosiegirl: Ok what would you do if your husband, with no history, did this to you? We dont have all the facts either when bees discuss their DV but no one takes it lightly then. She may not have had bruises, maybe she didn't want to say anything to get her husband in trouble. The judge could have given a different discipline if he felt this was minor instead of making it into a joke.
To be fair to the judge, he also ordered that they go to marriage counseling. This is a pretty light hearted sentence for such a serious thing though.
@hisgoosiegirl: You're right, none of us know what happened. But what's worse:
A) A man has a one-time offense where he pushes his wife and grabs her neck. He goes through the court system and loses some money and time. He finishes up with the likely very minor repercussions and goes back to his wife. Happily ever afer.
B) A man pushes his wife and grabs her neck. She is afraid of him, so she calls it a 'minor incidence.' Plus it's never happened before, so she doesn't want him punished. The judge sentences him to take her to dinner. Husband gets the message that his DV is a joke and eventually escalates further, becoming highly violent and abusing her for years.
I'm sorry, but any man who does this--no matter how 'minor'-- should be sent a message that its WRONG.
I saw this too and was wondering if someone would post it. I thought the headline was funny and was interested to hear what his "offense" was. Then I read it. Shoving her down on the couch and grabbing her by the neck? I don't care how heated our argument gets, my husband would never put his hands on me like that, and I think a husband who would needs more than a "bowling date" sentence. Sure, she may have been a total bitch, but there's absolutely no excuse for shoving someone and grabbing them by the neck. And way to send a great message, judge! Report your abusive husband to the police and you could win a dinner at Red Lobster! **with the guy who shoved you down and grabbed your neck** Have fun! You crazy lovebirds!
@MissGreen: It would depend -is it a fight where I am hitting him too? Did I actually feel scared or was I just angry at him and decide that I could really get him in trouble?
Because that's what I feel like (from the little I've read) was going on here. They get into an altercation and she got so angry and decided she was really going to get him in trouble.
He is also making them go see a marriage counselor which sounds like a great idea, and hopefully it helps them work out their issues.
This is really disturbing to me. I think demanding that they go to couples counseling is appropriate, but the nice dinner seems like it's making light of the DV incident. "Just take the little lady out to dinner and all will be forgiven." Not cool.
The story doesn't provide very many details so I'm not entirely clear on what exactly happened - but the way the story is written and the "sentence" that was handed down rubs me the wrong way.
@MsMonkey: if that gets stuck on his record and he does any amount of time, he'll lose his job and be practically un-hireable in this economy. That is not harmless.
I don't take domestic violence lightly at all, I simply think this is a case of two people letting their tempers get th better of them.
Yeah there isn't a lot of information and we don't get his side if the story. I just can't believe that was actually the sentence!
I feel that we don't know enough about what really happened, but I also feel that the message here is wrong and dangerous. The hand on the neck thing just doesn't scream "funny" to me. If it was so minor, then why were the police involved in the first place?
What grosses me out the most is that NBC Miami reported, "Just in time for Valentine's Day..." UGH. A joke response to domestic violence is such a turnoff.
Wait a second, he didn't wish her happy birthday, so she yelled at him about it, and it ended up with him choking her and shoving her against the sofa? Something just doesn't seem right with this.
I am NOT OK with this.....I saw where they are going to marriage counciling but.... nope still not good enough.
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| Lyndzo | 46 |
| Brielle | 38 |
| AshleyR83 | 30 |
| mypinkshoes | 29 |
| rebwana | 26 |
| funkymunky85 | 26 |
| fivemonthsnotice | 26 |
| his chippymunk | 25 |
| Cady | 25 |
| fishbone | 25 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| tenacity | 4 |
| imageeksowhat | 3 |
| Cady | 3 |
| Ms Flamenco | 3 |
| keepsmiling19 | 2 |
| Sasha2011 | 2 |
| This Time Round | 2 |
| ladybugmommy2010 | 2 |
| mightywombat | 1 |
| vmec | 1 |
I can't with this article...
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/46310882/ns/today-celebrates_valentines_day/t/judge-orders-man-take-his-wife-bowling-date/
What do y'all think of this? Does the sentance fit the crime?