(Closed) Just a bit hurt…

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
14498 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I know you are hurt and that was not nice of her, but you should take the high road and go to the wedding, never mention it, and have a good time.  However, just because you go, that does not obligate you to watch their children.  They are grown ass adults and can watch their own children, it is not your responsibility.  Go to the wedding and party it up like any other adult would.

Post # 4
879 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@tksjewelry:  I agree 100%

Post # 6
3264 posts
Sugar bee

Agree with the PPs.  There is nothing you can do about her wedding party (though it would cause me to reflect on the relationship, and possibly change how I feel about them and what I would be willing to do for them).

But I would tell them the next time that they mention it, that you are not prepared to be their babysitter at the wedding, and that they will have to find other arragements to watch the children. 


Post # 7
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

@tksjewelry:  also agreed.

You’re at the wedding as a guest, not a babysitter. Maybe Darling Husband can suggest that they sit you at his table? I would never dream of putting the best man or MOH’s spouses at another table.

Post # 8
3626 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@rebwana:  Yeah, I would insist that my husband sit with me. If he does, I probably wouldn’t mind being left out of the wedding party.

Post # 9
2965 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@andielovesj:  I agree with this and also I agree with letting them know you want to sit with your husband (how would she like if she couldnt sit with hers??).

Post # 10
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Sure you have a right to feel hurt but let it go.  Who knows what is going on in that girls head or why she made that decision.  I could see this happening to me because people know I would be helpful and secure and not care.  That is what I’m guessing.  Its not your day, who bleeding cares, you are married and your wedding was lovely.  Go, be happy, be helpful, its one day, let it go.  

Complain to us any time you want


Post # 11
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I would NOT be babysitting other’s kids at the wedding and make that well known. That is just RUDE that they even expect that from you. 

I sat alone at a wedding that my now fiance was a groomsman was in….I was kind of annoyed that I was sat with another groomsman’s short term gf, and another of the groomsman’s wife was sat with their family…..turns out she would’ve made a fuss if she was sat with randomers and they knew i would handle the situation well….so there was a method to the madness….I was always included in all the wedding stuff (showers, bachelorette parties, etc…..)

I would take the high road, not mention the seating arrangement, but I would refuse to babysit other’s kids…..do it nicely and suggest they hire someone to do this….

Post # 12
1866 posts
Buzzing bee

@tksjewelry:  Absolutely agree.


I would be irritated too if I were you, but the fact is there really isn’t anything you can do about it, and you don’t want to seem like you’re causing trouble by mentioning it.  I would go with your head held high and try to have the best time you can.  And you definitely do not need to babysit other people’s children.  

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