Just curious…do you prefer to give gifts off the registry or cash?

posted 2 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
4413 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I always just write a check, because then I don’t need to plan in advance and can write it in the car on the way to the wedding 🙂

Post # 3
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Boxed gift for the shower, cash/check for the wedding

Post # 4
1970 posts
Buzzing bee

Mrs.Sawyertobe:  I also prefer giving a physical gift (registry-listed or otherwise).  I imagine that when I am even older than I am now, and my cousins’ children get married, etc., I will be more comfortable giving them cash gifts than I am giving cash gifts to peers. 

I would never give cash to someone who outranks me (supervisor, older relative, etc.).

Edited: I also see checks from peers as possibly saying, “I didn’t think about this or you, so here’s a check,” especially since, when I am asked about the matter, I make it clear I personally do not prefer cash gifts.  (Of course, I accept all gifts gratefully and acknowledge them all with a handwritten note, and would never, ever breathe a word to anyone complaining about gifts I have received.) I see that a read of the prior replies to mine on this thread suggest that this is not always an unreasonable move on my part.

Post # 5
568 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Gift from the registry for the shower, check or cash for the wedding. I haven’t really seen people bring many gifts to the actual wedding, I would personally feel uncomfortable walking into a wedding with a wrapped gift.


I did joke with one of my friends that I was going to wrap up like a spatula or something in the most obnoxiously large box and bring it to her wedding, just because most people we know dont bring gifts just money.

Post # 7
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I’m usually not a fan of giving cash or gift cards as gifts, but weddings are one of the few occassions I do.  It is just so convenient not having to worry about lugging a gift, especially when traveling.  

As a married woman, at my wedding, while there were wedding gifts I absolutely love and use often, none of them were things we actually “needed.”  The cash is far more helpful for us to start our life together.  I would only be tempted to give a gift if I knew the couple very well and knew there were particular items they really wanted or needed, or something I knew would be very special for them.  One of my wedding guests gave us cash inside a picture frame.  I thought that was really cute!  We got cash which was more useful, but still had fun opening the gift and now we have another frame for our wedding photos.      

Post # 9
744 posts
Busy bee

I almost always send a physical gift off the registry, sent directly to the couple, well in advance of the wedding (both so I can make sure I get my choice of gifts, and because I figure it’s much easier for the couple).  I would be more likely to write a check to family members, but I feel weird giving my friends money.  I know they know how much the registry gift cost of course, just a weird psychological thing.

Post # 10
2791 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

I usually end up giving a check or a gift card for the place they registered. I always really stress about the amount though…. Sometimes I’ll buy a gift if I see something on their registry that interests me and occassionally add something ‘extra’ that i thought they’d like. It really depends on what they registered for and how busy i am at the time.

Post # 11
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

This is going to sound REALLY sad, but I haven’t gotten a wedding invitation in 9 years. Last one I got addressed to me was when I was 19 and it was a girl I graduated high school with. I also got invited to a wedding with my parents that year by our next door neighhbors. No one in my FI’s life or mine has gotten married since we were together.

However, I would buy off the registry. I despise giving money as a wedding present as I think it’s tacky. I would buy it ahead of time and send it to the bride’s mom unless the bride & groom were living together.

Post # 12
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Neither. I like to make wedding quilts.

Post # 13
884 posts
Busy bee

I prefer to both give and receive cash related to weddings since I am in my 30’s. All our friends are pretty well established and what they need most is money to pay off the expensive wedding. We have all the normal stuff people would want to give us. We actually have double most stuff since we met in our late twenties. We even have two houses!  

I imagine most gifts we will receive will either replace our stuff (if nicer) and our stuff will go to the garage sale or the gifts we get will be sold via kijiji. That being said I would love heartfelt, hand made gifts over cash or registry (we’re not registering…but that idea). My aunts are making me a quilt for a wedding present. I LOVE that. 

Post # 14
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: mountain venue

whatever is asked

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