- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2015
I guess this is a vent. . .
I’m just feeling grumpy, tired, run-down, and tapped out lately. I finished my last semester of graduate classes in December (when the next semester begins I’ll start working on my thesis), and was pretty much immediately flung into the insanity of the holidays. My FI and I just got engaged in october and because of being away for school, I didn’t feel like I’d gotten to enjoy being engaged much at first. I was hoping to be able to enjoy it more once classes were done, but with the holidays and having to do stuff with both families for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years, and my FI’s birthday over this weekend, and trying to fit in as much work at my job as I could, I still don’t feel like we’re really ENJOYING being engaged.
We only have a budget of about $5000-8000 for our wedding, and we’ve been trying to find a venue that we can afford. It is freaking hard, and every time a quote for a beautiful venue comes back costing most of our entire budget (and that never includes the food, which is another appallingly enormous expense) I feel poorer and poorer. I hate it.
For my FI’s birthday, I cooked a bunch of nice food, but we’d spent the whole weekend cleaning out our closets and cleaning the house, so I ran out of time to go get a nice birthday card. I had some gifts for him, but the card ended up being one I’d just had hanging around that he’d seen before, and I feel bad– I was so grumpy the evening of his birthday, and his family came over before we’d had dinner and I got even grumpier and sooo hungry and then when they finally left I ate hugely, which completely busted my efforts at changing my diet (though I am getting back on track today).
I guess I just feel bad. I was so grumpy on my FI’s birthday and I’m so tired out and I’m stressed about money and I don’t find wedding planning fun because everything is too expensive. Bleeccchhh. Plus I’m dealing with an ongoing health issue and I just feel run ragged. . .. I want to go take a day at a spa or something but I can’t.
Additionally, I’ve been away at grad school most of the time for the last 1 1/2 years and now I have no friends where we live. I miss my friends from school and it’s just odd readjusting to being with my FI all the time and never spending time with friends.
OK, I guess I should stop whining. At least I have a job and a home to live in!