Just Found Out DH's Dad is in Love with Another Woman!

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
139 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Wow, I feel so bad for your DH’s step mom. To go through something like this is bad enough, but for it to happen while she’s battling cancer must be devastating. 

Do you live close to them?  I would try to comfort her and pure all my attention onto her and DH.  I know it’s easier said than done, but she needs to concentrate on getting better.  I don’t see this “Jess” character and your FIL having any type of real relationship.  That should be obvious.

Such a sad situation.

Post # 4
Member
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

 

CarterLove:  holy bananas!!!! I feel so bad for your DH’s stepmom. What a blow to her. This girl really sounds like a piece of work. :\ Im sorry this is happening. people can make life really messy sometimes. Geez…. what a mess your DH’s dad has made 🙁

Post # 6
Member
1249 posts
Bumble bee

I’m so sorry. I’m sure this must be hard for the 3 of you 🙁

Post # 7
Member
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

 

Wow…is she like, a great cook or something? TWO men who work with this woman have feelings for her and she acts like that? WTF?

But seriously that is such an awful to do to your DH’s stepmom. Poor woman.

Post # 9
Member
876 posts
Busy bee

Please tell your DH’s stepmom to go to the forums at *surviving infidelity*. They will have all kinds of support and also invaluble info on how to best approach this before it gets any worse. There is a very specific approach she needs to take to get her husband out of his *fantasy fog* and snapped back to reality. There are also several behaviors that will keep him in that fog if she engages in them. The sooner she knows how to approach this, the better chance her marriage has of surviving.

Post # 11
Member
6749 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Wow- that is a heck of a story.  What a dick that he is being unfaithful as she is fighting cancer.

Post # 13
Member
876 posts
Busy bee

Okay. Still give her that info please as that site is an excellent support resource for her. And, believe it or not, there is an actual board there for cancer-fighters who are being cheated on so she can get that extra shoulder.

And one thing about affairs is that of course he is going to think things could be better with this random woman because they are not living real life and dealing with real life issues together. Like housework and bills and all those little fantasy-eroding habits that come with a long-term close-quarters relationship. There are ways to force these *fantasy lovers* to experience real life and to accelerate that process. That website can help her with that. If she is going to just let him go and divorce him, she still needs to protect herself and her interests and there is plenty of advice on that site to steer her in the right direction in that regard.

Post # 14
Member
1249 posts
Bumble bee

CarterLove:  Actually,  I was referring to your step MIL, you, and your husband.  Infidelity often affects the family of the cheater before the cheater ever feels any repercussions. I cannot imagine how hard it must be. I agree the best you can do is be supportive to your husband &  step-MIL.

 

Post # 15
Member
525 posts
Busy bee

3 years ago a friends dad died. At the time, he was with this hysterical live in girlfriend. There is a very nasty etate battle still going on, as the girlfriend is claiming way more than was in the will. Just knowing that, I think that DH should be careful. This is not mercenary – my friend is torn up and in pain and has had to go to court numerous times. She is not fighting for tons of cash, but actually personal pictures and tapes that were left in her dad’s home. On one hand, this will not affect DH in many ways – but it may come back at him and I would worry that you are going to be his emotional support if this woman gets her claws into your FIL.

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