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That's really hard, but I think all you can do is be there for him in the way you would normally, and, if he expresses any concerns, listen to them. I think it's great that you're so sympathetic and aware of his feelings - he just needs to know you're there for him. :)
Sorry to hear that. I think it would be nice to acknowledge that he is going through a difficult time. You'll be every busy and get caught in many things, so now would probably be a good time for you and your FH to spend some time with him to let him know how much you both appreciate that he will still be there for you both despite this big change for him. Also, in terms of guests, who he would like to bring, etc., I would ask out of respect to him and his situation.
My FHs brother in law is in our bridal party (he still wants to be in the bridal party) and he just divorced from FHs sister..
how awkward can you get....
my bro and FIs sister were married and are getting divorced! he was a groomsman and she was my MOH! Its so hard to know how to handle this.
ccranetobe and sjones724. Eek! I feel for you both. I thought my situation was awkward! I wish you both the best of luck.
I kinda think they are grown adults to deal with this, they will behave on our day but I think it will be okay with him standing there same for your groomsmen, they are there to support you on your day.
So tough, but remember it's his brother's wedding and I'm sure he wouldn't want to miss it for the world...
My FMIL is going through a nasty divorce. FFIL left for her one of his college students...who he has since MARRIED. Yes, my FFIL's wife is our age. She's young, hot, blonde. FMIL is, well the opposite of those things...My heart aches for her. We don't know how to handle the situation, invite the new wife or not? It's something we've gone back and forth on for months now.
Virginia I dont think you have too.. its not her day. the most important this is that your FHs dad and mum will be there, but you kind of feel obligated dont you?
Sucks having a torn feeling!
@Ccrane yes, I felt that way originally. I was certain we would not invite her. But I have since moved on to feeling "this is your problem, not ours". I think we'll invite her and hope they can figure out a way to make it work. FI and I don't feel it's our place to make a decision which will dub us "the bad guys". Divorce sucks, problems like these arise and I feel strongly that it's the ex-couple's responsibility to make things work, especially at their son's wedding.
@Virginia--
Not that you really asked my opinion :), but I would totally NOT invite the new wife. To me, it is more important to preserve the relationship with your FMIL than it is to preserve a relationship with your FFIL's new Stepford Wife. It would cause a lot of drama that doesn't need to happen on your wedding day. FFIL will get over it.
@thiscantbe: I totally appreciate it! It's a terrible situation. Divorce sucks. In my opinion, there is no good solution. Damned if you do, damned if you don't!
@ Virginia -
Tread lightly with not inviting the new wife -as you may insult your FFIL and he might then say he wont attend. This happened to a friend of mine, and in turn the FIL made them feel like the bad guys - and just overall made it a miserable time leading up to the wedding.
If you do not want her to come, sit down with him and "discuss" it him. Tell him that while you accept that he has married her, but you do not want to make anyone uncomfortable.
He may work with you more than you think!
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and our wedding is in less than two months. I feel terrible for the guy. I'm sure it is going to be really hard for him to stand up with FI (his brother) while we get married and FBIL is in the middle of a divorce.
Anyone else gone through anything similar? Any advice on how to help him through it?