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Kippahs for all guests, including non-jewish??

posted 1 year ago in Interfaith
  • poll: Should every male, regardless of religion, wear a kippah during a Jewish Wedding Ceremony?
    Yes, otherwise its disrepectful. : (10 votes)
    30 %
    No : (14 votes)
    42 %
    Whats a Kippah? : (5 votes)
    15 %
    Depends : (4 votes)
    12 %
  •  
    1.
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    64 posts
    Worker bee
    mosh20    September 2011   Ohio

    Hi ladies, I need some suggestions. I'm lutheran, the FI is Jewish and he seems to think all male guests should wear a Kippah. However I have reminded him over and over again that my family, 1) has no idea what that is, 2) what to do with it and 3) have no idea that it shows a sign of respect. Anyways, after a long discussion he still wants to order enough for all the males, just in case. blah blah blah

    SOoo how should I have them displayed so that my family will not feel obligated to take one??? Just put them in a basket, next to the programs? Post a little sign next to them saying 'if you wish'. ha- I have no idea. I'm probably making a big deal about this little detail.

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    tranquility    August 20, 2011  

    I think the sign with the basket is a great idea. It gives people the option if they feel like wearing it but doesn't make them feel pressured into wearing them. And if you want to keep the sign short and sweet, you could add the meaning of the keppah in the program.

     

     
    3.
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    4,151 posts
    Honey bee
    Meowkers    August 27, 2011   Los Angeles, CA

    I would say it depends on where the ceremony is taking place. If it is in a place of worship, (temple/synagog), then yes everyone should wear one as a sing of respect for the place of worship.  If it's elsewhere than it should be optional.  

    I'm in the same situation (FI is Catholic), and we're setting the kippahs in a basket for anyone who wants one but did not order enough for every man.

     
    4.
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    3,504 posts
    Sugar bee
    Ms Hedgehog    July 10, 2011   Dallas/ Ft Worth TX

    We plan on having enough for just over 1/4 of our guests. Some of my side might wear them but in all likelyhood, it will be mostly his side. We might do closer to half... but we will see. Buying enough for everybody is a bit much I think. I don't want to spend money on too many of them!

     
    5.
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    941 posts
    Busy bee
    judithsr    October 16, 2011   Hastings, NY/Wedding Bear Mountain, NY

    We're planning on ordering kippot for most people...my fiance is converting so his family isn't Jewish, but mine is.  And I want people to have the option of wearing a kippah, especially since it's a Jewish ceremony.

    The wedding isn't taking place in a synagogue, so there's no NEED for one.  Though, I don't want anyone to feel left out.  Though I think my main motivation is that they have kippot in our wedding colors which is really exciting.  :-)

    And for your thought--I think a sign is a nice idea, maybe with a BRIEF explanation?  Like, a kippah/yamulke (or whatever word you want to use) is traditionally worn in religious Jewish services.  Please take one if you'd like.  

    OOOOH...and just to put it out there...kippot aren't restricted to just men.  The synagogue I was raised in had an emphasis on egalitarianism, and women were strongly encouraged and often expected to wear kippot.  So, just something to consider as well.  :-)

     
    6.
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    Worker bee
    mosh20    September 2011   Ohio

    Thank you for the replies so far. The ceremony is in an atrium of an old historic courthouse, so in this case maybe I'll reduce the order since its not a place of worship.

     
    7.
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    Honey bee
    Ms. Meowerson    May 12, 2012  

    i wouldn't say it is disrepectful, but it might be nice to have them anyways.  we always have gentiles at our passover seder every year and they like to wear kippahs

     
    8.
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    3,662 posts
    Sugar bee
    hermitcrab    June 2010   NYC

    We ordered more than enough - many women took them too, as a keepsake!

     
    9.
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    1,071 posts
    Bumble bee
    jedeve    August 14, 2010   Montana

    As a non-Jew (and non-man, for that matter), I wouldn't think its weird at all. I know synagogues I've visited usually provide them, and though I've never been to a Jewish wedding, I've seen pictures of the baskets all the time on wedding websites. I don't think non-Jews would be all that confused or offended or anything.

     
    10.
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    Worker bee
    abarber3    May 27, 2012  

    I think most non-Jews know exactly what a kippah is and wouldn't even be offended by it. Furthermore, a small sign explaining the tradition to the non-Jewish guests would further alleviate any confusion and if they are religious at all they may still feel honored to be given a novel way to show honor.

    My mother grew up in NJ and had many Jewish friends and was eventually invited to many Jewish weddings. The kippahs served kind of as a "favor" for the guests.... think about what's done for bar/bat mitzvahs as well.... usually there are kippah in coordinating colors of the child's theme. Bottom line: I really don't think anyone will be offended.

     
    11.
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    2,104 posts
    Buzzing bee
    finnaroo    August 7, 2010   DC (living in nyc now)

    we ordered 100--we were expecting around 175 guests (out of 215 invited), and had about 150 come. our wedding was in a synagogue and we're both Jewish, as are many of our guests...and we had SO many extra! if i could do it again i'd have ordered like 60 or 75

    and for displaying, we had them in a basket next to our programs at the entrance. people can take it if they want but don't have to. it's the same as in a synagogue--there are always some extra near the sanctuary doors in case someone forgot to bring theirs.

     
    12.
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    6,643 posts
    Bee Keeper
    artbee    February 28, 2010  

    We're Jewish, but since we have friends that aren't we had some that weren't worn. I didn't expect them to. I think the basket and a sign is a good idea, and maybe you can say what they are in the program so people will understand better. We just put ours out in a bowl.

    Kippahs for all guests, including non-jewish?? :  wedding keppah jewish ceremony 232323232%7Ffp63267%3Enu%3D3263%3E337%3E4%3C8%3EWSNRCG%3D344697%3C3%3A532%3Bnu0mrj

     

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