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I love this post. I have not had much experiences with weddings, so I am planning mine kind of blind. But when my FI and talk about what we want we use the words "comfortable" "fun" and "family." I think "feeling the love" and "warm 'n fuzzy" are great ways to think about it! I think you wedding will be fabulous!
I went to a wedding this weekend that was much the same as the one you described, as happy as I was for the couple, they didn't seem to be exuding the ecstatic, love filled vibe one would expect from two people in the midst of being married.
There were no meaningful vows, or speeches, not that you need those things to make a wedding, but they certainly would have helped the guests and attendants feel more involved in the ceremony. But to each their own.
I felt like such an awful attendant because all I could think of all night was "this is not what I want. Where's the love?"
@ScarletJwl Thank you! I know we all have different wedding styles, but I guess I just assumed that "love" was kind of a universal theme, y'know? And don't worry, I think everyone plans "blind" to some extent -- that's what we have Weddingbee for!
@missmouse29 I think experiences like these just serve to reinforce how we want our weddings to feel. All the talk about theme/mood/atmosphere is fine, but you can't use flowers in place of the warm fuzzies.
Thanks for the comments ladies, and good luck planning!
Thanks for posting something like this. In a way it makes me feel a little sad for them. But it's a nice reminder of what the day is all about... Love!
I guess I just don't see how someone isn't happy on their wedding day! I can't imagine being anything other than happy :] I get excited just thinking about it!!
I think the theme of Love is a great idea!
I've been to a couple weddings like this, the couples are still very happy and in love now but somehow their wedding stuff went awry. Like, it was too generic and the couples personality was just lost in it and you could tell they didn't feel like themselves that day or the bride was still sooo stressed about wedding planning and couldn't let it go the day of.
That's one thing I'm the most happy about with our wedding, everyone let all the stress go the day of and just had fun, I think everyone was a bit more emotional because of all the work and tired but it came out as love and tears and silly giddiness.
@Miss Chocolate: I think the bride and groom were happy in a general way (he's pretty quiet anyway, and she was smiling), just not as excited as I expect to be on that day!
@troubled: I'd take emotional tears and giddiness at a wedding any day!
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A recent family member's wedding has served as a reminder -- and perhaps wake-up call -- about how I want the atmosphere at our wedding to feel.
At this ceremony and reception, I didn't "feel the love". There was no romance, no incandescent smiles, no sparkling eyes, no happy laughter. The ceremony was solemn, completely devoid of inspirational readings or personal vows; both bride and groom spoke so quickly that it felt like they were completely unaware of what they were repeating. The buzzwords of the officiant's comments were "responsibility", "solemnity", and "serious undertaking of committment". Even the first kiss was a blink-of-an-eye peck.
The reception was, if anything, even worse. No cheering, little clapping, half-hearted toasts, and all the usual traditions (first dance, parent dances, bouquet/garter toss, cake cutting) were undertaken with little fanfare and much awkwardness. Few people even paid attention.
I requested songs from the DJ that got people up dancing; the songs he chose cleared the dance floor rather than filling it. Few people bothered to stay past the cake-cutting, and fewer still took the time to sign the guestbook or take fun shots at their fauxtobooth.
What's my point in sharing all of this? I have renewed and revised my goals for the wedding, and after lengthy discussions with my parents and of course fiance (who were all in attendance), we have agreed to remind each other to focus on the warm 'n fuzzy, loving, romantic, teary-eyed, overwhelming happiness that should be the only requirement of a wedding.
I just want every guest to feel the love -- of family, of friends, and between myself and my husband-to-be.
What are your thoughts on the atmosphere of weddings?